If he could hear

[fishy_go_byebye]

Your status is not quo.

[Spoken in the journal]

Your status is not quo.

[Written in the journal]

Your status is not quo.

[Drawn on walls in crayon and marker and something that looks suspiciously like spit before it dries.

Over and over and over again.]

Comments

dictated;

[workaphilic]

Had a reminder recently?

dictated;

[fishy_go_byebye]

It shouldn't have been real. It shouldn't have been... he would still be here, if it hadn't been real.

Their status is not quo.

dictated;

[workaphilic]

[a pause]

Not much to be done about it, is there?

dictated;

[fishy_go_byebye]

You were never simple.

dictated;

[workaphilic]

Still not. I don't have it in me.

[fishy_go_byebye]

Then don't say simple things.

[She didn't mean to yell, but it's all jumbled up and frustrated in her head and she just doesn't knowwwwww]

[workaphilic]

[His tone stays calm and even.]

I'm stating the facts as they are, Del.

[fishy_go_byebye]

I don't like these facts. They're stupid facts. They're not even factual facts when you disappear if you go too far.

[It must be easier to deal with her when she's willing to listen, even vaguely.]

[workaphilic]

Doesn't make them any less relevant.

We're visitors, all of us. You know that.

[fishy_go_byebye]

We don't get to have it when we go.

[It wasn't fair, that they forgot her.]

[workaphilic]

[Agreeing:] No.

Might be better that way.

[fishy_go_byebye]

[Mutter]

You think so...

[workaphilic]

Yes. And why shouldn't you? Saves you grief in the long run, doesn't it?

[fishy_go_byebye]

Your long is very short.

[workaphilic]

Maybe.

The point stands.

[fishy_go_byebye]

[She picks at something, and her voice says she's just being ornery and mean.]

Is John?

[workaphilic]

[His tone goes flat and cold. It's playing with fire, bringing John into a conversation like this, even (especially) for her.]

That doesn't matter.

[fishy_go_byebye]

You're not different for being special.

[It was not good of her, to tell him that. He needed being different. But she was angry and hurt and] they all ended up leaving and it wasn't fair when he said she was wrong to matter not matter they mattered she wanted to matter too.

[workaphilic]

I'm different for being right.

[She's prodding at all his sore spots, and it's making the bitterness and frustration he's been carefully controlling rush to the surface.]

Have it matter as much as you like. But don't pretend that won't change the moment this place decides it's finished with you.

[Because in the end, it doesn't. They'll go back and they'll forget and that will be that.]

[fishy_go_byebye]

Oh? No right ending for you.

[None at all.]

Don't have to go not to matter anymore.

[workaphilic]

[There's a significant pause.]

Fine. Are you expecting me to be broken up inside over it? Not as if you've said anything I didn't already know.

[fishy_go_byebye]

Shouldn't make light when you're already defensive.

[workaphilic]

Why shouldn't I? It doesn't matter anymore, does it?

[fishy_go_byebye]

Only when you're being mean.

[workaphilic]

[He scoffs.]

Frequently enough, then, if that's your definition of "mean."