[Backdated to around midnight. Action]

[cantacquityou]

 

[It was after midnight. Edgeworth was clad in a pair of deep-red pajamas, placidly enjoying a cup of tea in his kitchen, alternating between reading a chapter of the Steel Samurai manga, playing a digital game of chess, and idly researching comparisons between alternative medical treatments and conventional methods of medical practice of certain maladies on his tablet, when the Valentine's Day decor suddenly exploded into being all at once like some Harry Potter shit. Since he has headphones on, listening to 
Symphony No. 8 in B minor 'Unvollendete' by Schubert,  he doesn't notice the sudden change in decor until he looks up moments later.

He sighs. Another one of the castle's shenanigans, no doubt. He takes a few moments to check the Paradisa feed and notes that everyone else seemed to have the same 'problem,' so he realizes that it's probably unnecessary to make a castle-wide post inquiring about it.

He rises from the stool that he was sitting on, and walks about, surveying the place. As he descends the stairs towards his bedroom, his head turned upwards, studying the gaudy bedizenment of every nook and cranny of the place, he is certainly not prepared for the other part of the castle's surprise... 

He is, needless to say, very startled to find Phoenix Wright standing near the foot of his bed. His body tenses in fright upon seeing the unexpected visitor in his room, nearing dropping the tablet in hand. He begins to exhibit an array of speechless gestures of aggravation, including face!palming, clenching his fist and such, before he yells:]






...What the hell are you doing here?!


[/Edit: Room now looks something like this: Bed, Ceiling, Kitchen, and various elements from these rooms.  And when the lights are off, the walls of the room glows like this, this, and this. Others: Couch, Toilet, Misc1, Misc2, Misc3.]

Comments

[takethat]

[This... is a good moment, and Phoenix can't keep himself from smiling. This is what he likes about having friends--the happy, silly sharing of secrets from the past, and the quiet, gentle downtime like this, too. It's been a while since he's been able to relax like this in pleasant company.]





I don't know what's going on with this castle tonight, but if I had to get stuck with someone, I'm glad it's you.

[cantacquityou]

[For some reason, there's a sudden pang in his chest. Unidentifiable and fleeting, but not...uncomfortable, either. Was that little feeling there...happiness, perhaps? Firstly he'd wish to question why, because he simply couldn't fathom why anyone would want to be locked in with him for a prolonged period of time.]




I-...uhm...erm...


...Likewise?

[takethat]

[THIS IS MY REALLY HAPPY FACE

JUST DON'T SCREW IT UP, PHOENIX]




The supply of chocolates doesn't hurt either, huh??

[cantacquityou]

Hm... I suppose...



[He looks over at the pile of Valentine's Crap, and with his free hand, he rummages through it a bit more, before grasping something. He pulls it out and tilts his head confusedly.]



...What is this thing?

[takethat]

What the heck!

[cantacquityou]

[He drops it as if shocked by a sudden surge of electricity.]


What? What?!

[takethat]

Is that a--


[the final words are hushed and frightened, uttered as if the few short syllables might cause sudden castle-wide death and destruction]

--sex toy?!?

[cantacquityou]

How am I supposed to know?!

[takethat]

That's what it looks like.

[He picks it up and holds it far away, like a smelly, dirty diaper, and peers at it.]

...definitely a sex toy.

[cantacquityou]

...



...What is the correlation between 'sex,' and this thing?

[takethat]

....please don't make me explain how it works.

[cantacquityou]

...Perhaps I should refrain from asking you how you know how it works.

[takethat]

I've seen something very similar before...

[Shrug. Questionable magazines, questionable websites.]

[cantacquityou]

Well, I'll just presume that it's made for going into some orifice of the body and I'll keep it at that.






[...bends it.]

[takethat]

Y-yeah, that--why are you playing with it??

[cantacquityou]

Why are you alarmed? I doubt it has been used.

I need a D8! icon

[takethat]

I--you just shouldn't!

Why do we have that in the middle of all this good chocolate, anyway?

I need a drink >_>;

[cantacquityou]

...Hmmm. [he rubs his chin as he squints curiously at it] ...Is this by any chance commonly used in homosexual male copulation?

[takethat]

More often than not, I'm pretty sure. Not that I know much about that.

[cantacquityou]

I see.

[Tosses it aside.]

...That explains everything.

[takethat]

...how does that explain anything at all?

[cantacquityou]

Spontaneous 'romantic' decor, you, strange sex toys...


[He picks up the little teddy bear, inspecting it.]


...Obviously, the castle had it's own awry ideas. For us, no less.

[takethat]

What do you--

[He knows Edgeworth is right--it's all so obvious.]

...oh god.

[cantacquityou]

...There, there, Mr. Wright...

[takethat]

...and you're just okay with this?