055. The Ocean

[samson]

[Look, it's Brock. He sounds mad! Not as mad as last time; this time he's just more annoyed than anything else. But still, that voice sounding annoyed is not something you want to fuck with.]

Alright. People really need to stop taking shit from my cabin. Just a little reminder.

The stuff outside is for you people to use. And I don't really care if you go inside if I'm not around. But I swear to god, if I need to start booby-trapping my freakin' fridge, I will.

[There's a loud sigh. When he continues, he sounds a little calmer. Making an effort!]

Anyway... since the weather's cleared up, the greenhouse is gonna be used strictly for flowers and whatever until it gets cold again. So use the outside garden for your vegetables.

I also built a smokehouse over the winter, and that's ready if you want to use it. Don't put any weird stuff you found out in the Dead Zone in there, though. Just stuff you bought from town.

Uh, cabin's southwest of the castle, north of the city. In case you don't know.

[Away from Molotov]
And if you see a little redheaded girl around, don't screw with her or I'll actually kill you. It's Molotov on a loss.
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Comments

[gottaknockhard]

[Oh, that's right. Spike knew there was something he was forgetting... More importantly--]

I was wondering what that was.

[assassino]

So if I take my novice out hunting, you do not want any meat from those buffalo?

And I saw your little wife already. Strange, where the castle's interest lie.

[mal_addict]

I honestly don't know why you're surprised any more when people do things to or in your cabin.

[samson]

Faith in humanity? I don't know.

[...but on a more serious (no, really) note:] Do you think I built it on a cursed plot of land or something?

[samson]

Yeah... she was just a cat a little while ago, too.

And no, I don't know what those things are made of. I heard that -- wait, since when do you have a "novice"?

[samson]

[YEAH, SPIKE... Brock's clueless, though.]

The smokehouse?

[assassino]

She is much less annoying as a little girl.

[And he laughs...]

Recently. What is wrong with the buffalo?

[samson]

I heard it's made of people or something.

[GOD HE WANTS TO MAKE A SOYLENT GREEN REFERENCE SO BAD........... restraint, Samson. Restraint.]

I don't know for sure. But it creeps me out.

[assassino]

How the fuck is a cow made from people?

[samson]

Maybe it's just a rumor? I don't actually know. But I heard people took some back from the Dead Zone sometime, like even before I got here, and cut it open or something. And inside it was people.

lmao

[kryptonian]

[Popping in]

Hey there!

Confirmed, it's people. I took a look at their internal structure and they definitely have human anatomy on the inside.

You're welcome.

Bye!

[assassino]

Would that not mean it ate people?

omfg

[samson]

[what the fuck

who the fuck]

Thanks?

[gottaknockhard]

[Do you think it would be too suspicious now if he shows up with a pack of the same beer that's missing...]

Yeah. I would have guessed outhouse, but it was a little big.

[samson]

I mean, I don't think it had body parts floating around in its stomach or anything.

[Before Supergirl corrected him up there, he actually thought it meant that they cut the buffalo open and its muscles, etc, were composed of human limbs??? But Brock is a little more fucked up than he lets on, so.]

I guess its... bones...? Are made of people bones.

[mal_addict]

...It's somewhat touching that you still have some of that.

[She takes a moment to consider this. REALLY consider it] It's possible? I mean, I wouldn't put anything past this place.

[samson]

[Just leave it anonymously on the doorstep, Spike. In a basket, swaddled in blankets. Orphaned beer.]

There's a bathroom inside the cabin.

[assassino]

How is that possible?

[Pause.]

I wonder if it tastes good.

[gottaknockhard]

Hey, I don't go snooping around all your rooms.

[See how unsuspicious that sounds? He's ace at this.]

[samson]

What the fuck.

[assassino]

It could just be part ape, instead of human, you know.

[samson]

I really don't want to rebuild it... I wonder if I can find a necromancer or an exorcist or something...

[samson]

That's not a whole lot better.

[samson]

[A+ Spike]

The cabin is only one room. There's only one other door, and it's to the bathroom -- you know what, never mind.

[gottaknockhard]

So have you used it yet?