[He's good at bullshit. He doesn't care, not about the Fireflies losing their opportunity to play pretend or the fact that he has to tell tales to himself in order to sleep at night, but he does care about disappointing Tess. He does care that it hurts her that he would make different choices in the end than she would expect.

But why did she expect otherwise? Why did she see so much in him that wasn't there? He was just her partner, not someone who could liberate her from the debt she owed on her second life. It wasn't on him or Ellie to live up to her expectations just because she was feeling guilty about the choices she'd made as a survivor. But that was too harsh for this moment, Joel decides as he spares her a side-glance, his brow furrowing up.]

Listen, whatever happened between you and me is separate from what went on in that fucking hospital. [Now he sounds old, his voice dropping to a low and stubborn pitch.] I know you think I'm a big damn disappointment right now, but I never made myself out to be more than I was to you.