069. For Your Life

[samson]

[Well, it's been a month. Slightly over a month, actually, but Brock can't help that. He's not in charge of when the castle decides to wig out. If he were, it'd happen a whole lot less, rest assured.

So, he's dictating to the pages in his usual hyper-blasé tone.]

Alright, that was a load of fun.

Look -- for those of you who don't me, I'm Brock. I've been here an extra long time, and I've seen a lot of bull happen, and I'm getting kinda bored of just letting it happen, you know what I mean?

A real long time ago, we had this thing called 'Peace Patrol'... if any of you guys remember it, don't worry. It was dumb as all hell and I'm not real keen on repeating that embarrassing mistake. But I think it's about time we formed some kind of defense force, right? Peace Patrol was all about policing each other, which is dumb for a lot of reasons, but long story short -- we need to start protecting each other from the castle and all the crap it throws at us on a, like, monthly basis.

[There is a brief pause. That was a lot of words. In the silence, there's the clink of a metal lighter and then an audible exhale.]

So. I ain't offering to be, like, 'Supreme Commander' or anything stupid like that. If you got more military training than me, freakin' go for it. I am offering to teach you guys non-lethal takedown methods in case your best friend tries to eat your face or something. Self-defense, how to analyze a threat, how to barricade, how to throw a punch -- whatever you want.

I don't do guns. So you'll need to get somebody else for that.

I've had a couple students before, but I'm thinking large-scale, here. So if you know any kind of offensive or defensive skill, let me know and I'll see if I can hook you up with somebody.

[A pause.] Uh, I guess I should mention if you wanna learn stuff just to hurt people, I'll probably just kill you. So. There's that.

- - -

[And, for people who want to run into Brock in person, he's presently walking up and down the castle walls, checking out the changes in scenery. He might occasionally give the edge of the wall a little kick to see how sturdy it is. He's dressed in civilian clothes, a light denim jacket and jeans that are slightly too tight, but he's got a crossbow slung across his back all the same.]

Comments

[dog_eat_dog]

Why the hell don't you do guns?

[samson]

[Oh, it's you.]

Guns are for pussies. A freakin' baby can kill a guy with a gun.

[sheps]

I agree. Any place as volatile as this needs a few good people to defend it. No matter how skilled someone is, they can always benefit by learning how to defend themselves and others.

[And here, have Shepard breaking the ice with the best lighthearted comment she can think to muster.]

Looks like I'll have the be the one to cover guns, though.

[rapscalliongirl]

How long is an extra long time?

I've got military training! But just the basic. If only the captain was here, [ suddenly she gushes about him wish a great smile in her voice ] he's be great as leader, he's amazing.

Did someone try to eat your face? Someone might have tried to eat Rohroh's face because he's got a big chunk missing! Did they try to cook you first?

Oh! And what's a gun?

Did you just say kill? If you tried, I'd eat your face, and you don't have to pay even a single denari.

[ A person should not talk so cheerfully about chewing off people's faces. Also not that fast. ]

Dictated

[indirectcause]

[After the Bloater incident, Ben has once again been taught he's not the best at surviving. Well, evidence back home is a testament to that. But if he's going to stay here, he's going to have to learn something. Rather with a stranger than someone who might give him an easier time over it.]

...I might take you up on that.

[dog_eat_dog]

[Yeah, her. The one you held at fault for not doing shit about the Bloater.]

That's ridiculous. If your gripe is about skill, then you obviously don't know shit about guns. And who the hell cares how "easy" it is? That's the point. Why waste my time and energy on fancy karate moves and that shit when guns are the most efficient way to stop people in their tracks? Sure, have a back-up plan for when you have no bullets, but why go for something more complicated and dangerous when you don't have to? Especially when your enemies don't have the same ridiculous biases

dictated;

[keelahs]

I'd hardly consider myself a military expert, but I wouldn't mind sharing a thing or two when it comes to handling a gun. That's as long as no one is stupid about it. [ She's not dealing with babies that shoot themselves in the foot or anything like that. ]

[samson]

[YEAH. YOU.]

Look, if you wanna shoot 'em up like you're John Wayne at the O. K. Corral, nobody's stopping you. I don't use guns, end of story. I don't need guns.

[samson]

[Oh, you're a new voice. Hi, lady, you sound attractive.]

I think the main problem is getting people off their asses to do somethin' about it. We got a ton of people here who are soldiers, fighters, whatever -- doesn't help us if we're disorganized and don't fill in our weaknesses.

[samson]

[That is... a lot of questions. All at once.]

Uhh.

forever!

[samson]

[Which is why Brock is bringing this up now -- too many people ran around like morons when the Bloater happened, and though he doesn't know the full extent of what happened while half the castle was sleepwalking (due to sleepwalking himself), he's pretty sure that ended badly as well. Seeing as how Cass apparently died.]

Hey, alright. What's your name?

dictated;

[samson]

That's... what's with your voice? [Because you sound like a robot???]

[rapscalliongirl]

Hello? You asleep? Or did a Maurenian rabbit get your tongue? Hey mister, hello~~?

[samson]

[Oh my god.]

You're... new, huh. Okay. [What did she even ask, he can't even remember.......]

I've been here like almost four years.

[rapscalliongirl]

I am, yes. I got here just two days ago.

That's a long time, huh. So you know a lot about this place, then? You were looking for soldiers and such, right?

[samson]

[WOW what a good time for the castle to shove someone in here. Right in the middle of one of its weird magic fits. A+, Paradisa.]

Yeah, I know some... I dunno how useful it's gonna be now that it decided to give itself a makeover, but. Yeah.

Soldiers -- yeah. You one?

[rapscalliongirl]

[ It changed just a few hours after she arrived, so yep. But at least she comes from a world of magic so she knows a little. ]

So it changed in appearance too? Because soon after I got here, the scent changed completely. It became, like, fresher.

Yup. I'm a member of the Reim Empire's special force.

[ And she's mighty proud of it. ]

We symbolize the power of the people!

[dog_eat_dog]

It's still a stupid attitude to take.

[samson]

For somebody who's such a bitch, you're like super judgmental, Tess.

[samson]

[THAT SOUNDS SUSPICIOUSLY LIKE COMMUNISM but he will get to that later.]

Wait, the scent?

[rapscalliongirl]

Yes, I have a very good nose, you see.

[ he just keeps focusing on the less important points, doesn't he. ]

[dog_eat_dog]

You know what? I've never claimed to be a good person, so if that's what you want to call it, fine.

[samson]

You mad 'cause I called you a bitch or 'cause I called you judgmental?

[samson]

[That's Brock for you.]

Uh. Okay then. [Whatever.......]

So... you're a soldier. What kind of weapons you use?

[dog_eat_dog]

Please. Neither means jack shit outta your mouth when you married someone worse in both categories.