03. Action for Demeter

[fatherandsun]

[It's been a few days since Goku left for camp and Konzen was hilariously transformed into a beautiful statue. As the days ticked by without his realizing, something happened. Somewhere, somehow, someone decided to allow him the honour of experiencing the joys of camping, and so with a crackle and a crunch, Konzen's statue sheds its stone and the God tumbles to the ground, gasping in shock as he has no idea how he's gotten outside or why. As common as it was for his aunt to troll him back in Heaven, it never ceased to infuriate him. He looked about, seeking answers and finding none though the nearby cabin he seemed to have been a statue close by did seem a much better place than the little clearing he'd been standing in.

And a bird had been putting nesting material on his head. That had to go.

He stretched, groaning and trying to ignore the rising fury in the back of his mind as he approached the cabin... but as his high-heeled sandal caught the edge of a tree root and he tumbled to the ground in a lump of awkward God, he let out a cry of frustration that startled the birds from the trees.

Nature, he decided while pulling grass and twigs from his long hair, was best viewed from a distance on even the best of days.]

Whoever did this to me is going to pay for it! This is unacceptable and absolutely preposterous, not to mention ridiculous! A statue! I was a statue! Of all of the unforgivable, irritating pranks!!

[His prissy-fit has been unleashed. Cower all from the out-of-shape God in grass-stained silk.]

Comments

dictated, if that's okay? If not, ignore

[wishmadeinfire]

_{[Oh, he knows the feeling. He was trapped as a statue for a week or so, and yet he could see and hear everything that was going on around him. It was torture. But he had been inside, thankfully, during that horrendous time.]}

Be careful moving about. Being a statue tends to make you cramp up and a bit sore.

[fatherandsun]

[He noticed the horrible cramping, definitely... and the journal, now tucked nicely under his arm despite him being certain it wasn't there before, is opened so he can talk back.]

I would imagine being stone locks one up, yes. I'm infuriated. The nerve of---of whoever did it!

I'm going to need to stretch for hours.

[wishmadeinfire]

It was mostly likely the Castle's doing. I was stuck as a statue for a week, a little more once, and it was a loss for me.

[fatherandsun]

[A nearby songbird lights on a branch, warbling. He pauses to watch it.]

The Castle has the ability to turn us to stone? But why?

[And finally, his mind back on track, he asks the obvious.]

It wouldn't do that to children, would it?

[wishmadeinfire]

It could. It has no problem turning us into animals, de-aging us, making us do things we would never do. I do not think it much cares about age, religion, sex, etc.

dictated

[solar_absorber]

Oh, that must be why we couldn't find you.

[Hi Konzen meet one of Goku's friends who was ready to send out a search party for you.]

[goldencirclet]

Konzeeeeeen!

[Monkey. Knees. Enjoy that tackle.]

[fatherandsun]

How hideous. Children shouldn't be put through such things.

And I will resist any such things as "making us do things we would never do." I'm not so easily swayed.

[fatherandsun]

Hrrrmmph. How irritating. Being a statue for as long as I was---I don't even know how I wound up out here! And there was a bird nest on my head!!

[fatherandsun]

[Not if he catches you, chimp-o. Konzen counters the monkey-tackle with a swing, using Goku's momentum to swing him around and THEN allow the hug. It helps drain the energy somewhat so he doesn't get bruises to his legs. Also noogies of frustration.]

Goku! Why was I a statue out here---where am I!?

[goldencirclet]

[As long as he gets a hug, monkey doesn't mind. He even laughs at the noogie, grinning up at Konzen.]

It's the castle being stupid again. Sometimes it does things like this... taking everyone away and making us do stuff. This is a camp.

[Pause.]

Ya got t'be a statue?

[fatherandsun]

Don't make it sound like some privilege. A bird---a bird made a nest on my HEAD!

[goldencirclet]

Konzen, birds poop on statues.

[He says this as a matter of fact, making an eww-face.]

Y'sure it only made a nest?

[fatherandsun]

The stone flaked off of me. If it did anything else, it's on the stone over there.

[There's a really creepy perfectly-preserved face-plate in the stone pile, too. It looks JUST like him.]

[goldencirclet]

[Guess what? That is now Goku's trophy.]

Uuuwaaah, that's awesome!

[fatherandsun]

...that's creepy! It's my face! Goku, you can't keep something like that! Give it here.

[wishmadeinfire]

Good luck to you. It is not nearly so easy as you think. The castle can change the landscape of the world, after all. That is testament to its power.

[goldencirclet]

Nope! It's mine now!

[He giggles.]

I'll put it on t'wall~

[solar_absorber]

The birds seem to have a mind of their own around here. There's this guy in my cabin that had a bird nesting in his hat. [It was really amusing.]

But hey, at least you're not a statue anymore! Bright side and all that.

[fatherandsun]

Well here is a testament to my power: I won't let it toy with me!

[fatherandsun]

At least I'm not a---I shouldn't have been one in the first place!

[fatherandsun]

You are not putting my face on the wall. It's creepy and I won't be able to sleep properly if it's there. No, Goku.

[goldencirclet]

But-!

[Well, any argument he had is now invalid due to the fact that he just dropped the stone-face and it shatters.]

Shit.

[Guess who hangs around teenagers?]

oh my god konzen no one cares stop being so stuffy fffffffffff

[fatherandsun]

[Konzen is momentarily mortified by his own face shattering in pieces but even MORE SO when Goku swears.]

Goku! I don't ever want to hear that kind of talk from you again! That's not a word you should be using.

"Anything you can say with a swear can be said with a mature word." Remember that.

but daaaaaad

[goldencirclet]

S-sorry! It just slipped out!

[Because he knows it's a bad word. Thankfully.]