003;

[fulltilt]

[what's the best way to wake yourself up?

go for a few rounds in your car in the courtyard, of course! julie's just cruisin' along, because she's a careful driver and she's learned from her arrival at paradisa that she shouldn't be driving full speed on the castle grounds. not if she wants to scare any more people, anyway.

but... she's been going a bit too slowly during the last few laps for her own tastes, so she gradually starts putting more pressure on the gas, until she can't take it anymore and puts the pedal to the metal.... and the car's not going any faster.

distraught, she slams her foot down on the gas again, practically grinding her boot into the floor, her eyes narrowed in concentration and annoyance, but the car's still going at the pace of a go-kart]

Ugh, come on, come on..... [still nothing. baby's discovered her loss, uh oh! and at the worst possible time, too...]

Comments

[assassino]

[Ezio is out and about today. Not that he isn't every other day, but he happens to be up earlier than usual, heading to the stables to take Maximus out for a ride.

He also happens to be in the path of a car.

In the Renaissance, things don't usually move faster than a horse. As such, Ezio has trouble gauging the speed and the distance. He'll be out of the way in time, right? Right. So he just keeps on his path, assuming that the car is going to swerve out of his way, seeing as car drivers can always see exactly where they're going and have huge control over their vehicles -- they can stop on a coin, unlike horses and carts!

He just keeps walking.]

[fulltilt]

[omg what an idiot. julie's slightly agitated at the moment, temporarily forgetting the importance of keeping her damn eyes on the road. er, courtyard. she switches between checking her gears and practically pushing the gas pedal into the floor, before she realizes hey, there's a dude walking ahead in the path of her car and

she just yells, finally releasing the gas before slamming on the brakes and trying to swerve.

julie's an experienced driver, but it's too late -- the car's garnered too much speed to slow down in time and before she knows what's happening, hears a sickening thud of impact as her car hits the poor guy

oh

my

god]

[assassino]

[This is a fairly new sensation. Ezio has been trampled by people and trampled by horses, and even hit by horses... but he's never been hit by a motor vehicle, probably because they don't fucking exist in his time and aren't terribly common in Paradisa to boot.

So right before she hits him, he gets this idea in his head that he should just try to jump ON IT instead of letting himself get hit, because that would be easier than running away. (Truth be told, the jump is at least 50% knee-jerk instinct in surprise. Fuck, he wishes he had Eagle Sense to warn him about these things.)

As expected, this does not go well.

Ezio ends up rolling across the hood and up, and it hurts like hell, especially when he hits the windshield (sorry about the inevitable crack) and then up and over. Good thing he was wearing a reinforced tunic, really. He ends up on the ground on the other side of the car, running entirely on adrenaline for the next few moments.

All he can muster is:]

Pezzo di merda, che cazzo?!

[He ain't eloquent.]

[fulltilt]

[the car skids to a stop, and julie's mouth hangs open in shock.

she. just hit a guy. with her car.

she glances at the rearview mirror and sees him on the ground, and her heart sinks when she registers the gravity of the situation. at lightning speed, she undoes her seatbelt and bolts out of her car, her hands up to her mouth as she jogs up to where ezio is.

and all she sees is blood and oh my god]

OhmyGod, oh my God. [she drops next to him, fluttering her hands nervously but not touching him] I-I'm so sorry, can you move? Can you hear me? [she looks around, in case someone's nearby] We have to get you to a clinic, your head is bleeding, and...

[assassino]

{The adrenaline is pumping, here. Ezio tries to pick himself up, immediately shifting his weight to favour one wrist as he gets to all fours, and eventually standing a little gingerly. There's a cut on his head, just under his hairline, and it is making a considerable stream of blood pour down his face.

Which honestly isn't bad, for Ezio. He's had worse.

Right now he's just mad about getting hit.]

I don't need a clinic, I'm fine! What I need is fewer crazy women drivers!

[He reaches up the brush away the blood with his hand, but it streams anew after a second, so he just holds his hand to his forehead.]

[fulltilt]

[will mercifully ignore that last comment for now, because he needs medical attention and is losing blood fast.

she gets back on her feet and runs towards her car, rummages through things under the passenger seat, and comes peeling back, slipping a little when she gets back down beside him.

unwrapping bandages with her teeth, she drops a few rags in a pile in front of her (ok they might have some grease on them... sorry) and taps ezio's hand to move it from his forehead. she's still panicking, talking fast, with her hands shaking slightly]

Look, you need to get to a clinic, seriously, because you've got a geyser of blood coming from your head and we have to close it up, now!

[assassino]

[Stubborn forever. He just sits back on his butt, because lol fuck standing up, and gives her a sour look.]

I don't need that, I'm fine, it's just a scratch.

[A scratch that is currently dribbling blood down his face.]

Could you even see over the wheel?

1/2

[fulltilt]

[SHE SEES YOUR ASS ON THE GROUND EZIO, this means you can't even muster enough strength to get up. julie gives him a sour look right back and points the bandages at him, shifting closer beside him because lol man, you are not escaping her. she's stubborn, too.]

Just a scratch, seriously? No. Come on. [upon her first arrival she's had people asking her if she can drive, or if she could park, and she doesn't know if she can take any more jabs about it. especially if people hear she hit a resident with her car, and she'll --]

[fulltilt]

[-- oh, no. that last comment. annoyance starts bubbling up, and she grabs a rag and throws it at him. not at his face, though. she's nicer than that]

I could see over the wheel, but you were stupid enough to walk straight into the path of a fast-moving vehicle! And I'm going to drag you all the way to the clinic if I have to!

Now get up.

[assassino]

[Oh god, his kryptonite: sassy, order-giving ladies.

Ezio makes a sour face when she hits him with the rag -- how dare you, lady -- but he grumbles and starts picking himself up again. To his feet he goes!]

How hard can it be to avoid a man?

[But here we go, to the clinic.]

[fulltilt]

[success. but first, she holds her hands up to stop him from moving]

Wait a second. We should bandage your wound first, and maybe wipe your face down. You know, so you don't give anyone a heart attack. [she hands him a rag. the one with the least amount of grease on it]

[assassino]

[He scowls and takes the rag, wiping his face with it. Truth be told he doesn't really care about how clean it is, clean linens are a luxury in his time.]

I don't even know what a heart attack is.

[fulltilt]

[stares at him, unwrapping the bandages while doing so]

Heart attack? When your heart stops because blood can't get to it anymore. I mean, people don't actually get heart attacks when they see something shocking; it's just an expression, more than anything.

[assassino]

What are you even rambling about?

1/2

[fulltilt]

[fulltilt]

... Nothing, nevermind.

[moves forward with the bandages] I'm not a doctor or anything, so don't razz me for not doing this right, but just bear with me.

[assassino]

If you are not a dottore, how can I trust you with this?

[thehangedrose]

[Guess who is out in the courtyard again and actually not stupid this time to get run over by a (admittedly very slow) car?]

[This tattered-looking guy! And he remembers that car really well, so he tries waving to her from a few feet away so she can notice him.]

Hey! Hey, Julie!

[ooc: If this isn't an open post I can delete this comment. ;;]/small>

[fulltilt]

[gives him a look] I'm just wrapping your wound with these bandages so the real doctors can work their magic. You know, to help staunch the flow, in the meantime.

[fulltilt]

[let's say this all happens before julie rams into ezio with her car ajkhdkjs. and luckily for garry, julie's looked up in time to see him waving from far away :D she slows down a bit, trying to calm herself down. no use panicking about her car right now!

so she parks it and steps out, giving a smaller wave as she starts making her way to him]

[ooc; no, don't worry! :D the post is totally open!]

[assassino]

[Scowl, but he's chilling out a bit more. Slowly but surely.]

Alright, alright, calmati, I will let you do it.

[He removes his hand.]

[fulltilt]

[good. cooperation is good, and no more mr grumpypants!

satisfied, she slowly puts the bandage against the wound and begins wrapping around his head. his hair is probably sticking around everywhere, but at least the cut is covered up.

she ties the end of the wrappings and sits back on her heels, reaching for the rag to wipe some blood off her hands as she admires her handiwork.]

Hm. Not bad. You look a little crazy, but that's all my doing. Sorry.

[assassino]

[How can he attract the ladies now?!

Ezio frowns, wondering how bad it actually looks, and then he puts his hand over the bandages, just to feel it out.]

I will hold you responsible if I die from this, donna pazza.

[He's teasing... sort of...]

[fulltilt]

[that earns an eye-roll from julie, and she gets to her feet, holding a hand out to him to help him up] Uh-huh. If I can recall correctly, I'm pretty sure it was you who said that it was "just a scratch".

[pause] What's a... donna pizza?

[assassino]

It's "pazza!" [One of those Italian hand gesticulations.] Donna pazza. It means "crazy woman."