paradisa | Dictated/Action

Entry tags:

john egbert

Dictated/Action

[ John is standing in the middle of the lobby with a pie in this hand. It's just a normal blueberry pie, but for some reason John looks ecstatic about it. He's got his journal open on a table next to him, but he's also walking up to random people who happen to be trying to just pass through like normal people and asking them to offer him the pie.

Yes, the pie he himself is holding, he wants you to offer it to him!

After a little bit of this though he does move back over to his journal to jabber away into it. ]

You guys! This is amazing. I don't know what happened, but for some reason my loss is gone! This stupid loss I have had for years is finally gone!

[ He'll probably be less excited when he realizes he's got a new loss instead, but let him have his day. ]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Wow, fuck you. That is the most unfair thing this castle ever did.

Are you going to tell me what your loss was now?

Hehehe!

And maybe. Or maaaaybe I will keep it a secret forever.

Ha ha. What do pies have to do with it?

Ugh, it's this really long stupid story.

I'm not doing anything. I've got all the time in the world to hear your stupid story, Egbert.

[ A big, dramatic sigh. ]

Basically whenever someone offered me any kind of baked goods I had to eat it.

[The longest pause.]

Are you fucking with me, Egbert?

No. It was really dumb and annoying.

Wow, yeah. I'm sure it really sucked that you got fed nice shit and had to eat it. It's like childhood trauma repeating itself over and over for you, huh?

[Suddenly he imagines if his loss became something to do with puppets and he feels a little more thankful.]