Twenty Five Truffula Trees

[whichwayyoulean]

[Well, at least the Once-ler doesn't sound panicked as he finds his journal today. He does, however, leave a big black smear of something that looks like what would be the result of tar and oil having a horrendous pollution-filled love child. Better not touch that. Side effects include extra eyes, webbed appendages and minor cases of glowing. Still, the Once-ler is not panicking, he KNOWS what this gunk is and he has dealt with it many times before. He has a very sympathetic tone as he speaks into the journal...if 'sympathetic' is another term for 'patronising']

Wow, gosh, it sure must be so upsetting for everyone here to have whatever they regret or are ashamed of the most hounding them every waking moment of their lives. To never be free, even for a second of the terrible knowledge of what they've done wrong. Not a moment's reprieve to forget it and enjoy their lives for the briefest of moments. Man, I can't imagine what that must be like.

[One of his little unless-es starts scrawling itself across the page, almost as if on cue]

Oh wait. Yes, yes I actually can imagine that. [Yup, any fake sympathy is gone] When its your permanent loss, you know, something that's with you permanently, then try complaining. I might actually start to care.

[Once-ler that's kind of what the unless thing is all about, you know CARING. There's another SPLOT of schlopity slop on the page]

Ugh. Thanks for the double dose of regret, castle. I'm just going to go sit in my shower and drink soup through a straw until all this is over.

Comments

[tapshoetomove]

[-there's a yelp followed by a thump.]

[whichwayyoulean]

[This is the sound of a heavy sigh of someone who saw this coming]

And this is why you need someone to look after you.

[tapshoetomove]

[He's lived in this room for months now he doesn't need a babysitter.

...Is what he'd like to say, but he just groans in response.]

[whichwayyoulean]

[No young man :|]

Seriously, just throw up a filter or something. I can't do anything but poison you right now.

[tapshoetomove]

[Luke whines a bit as he picks himself back up, fairly certain that he just made it so that he'd be staying off his leg longer now. That dull ache he had earlier now feels a little more painful.

...So much for being able to take care of himself.]

...Okay, I'll do it if you promise not to get mad at anymore people.

[whichwayyoulean]

[There's a long pause, before the Once-ler replies]

I'm pretty sure that's some sort of blackmail. And it's not a promise I can make indefinitely.

[tapshoetomove]

It doesn't have to be forever. Just...be nicer to the people who are really sad about what's happening to them right now, okay? That means you too.

[whichwayyoulean]

I'm never nicer to myself, but I'll work on the thing with other people.

Until this is over.

[tapshoetomove]

I'm glad to hear it, Mr. Once-ler. But you should at least try to be a little nicer to yourself too.

[whichwayyoulean]

A couple of people think that, it's still probably not gonna happen.

[tapshoetomove]

You should at least consider it...

[whichwayyoulean]

Okay. I'll consider it.




I considered it. Answer's still no.

[tapshoetomove]

That's not what I meant. At least try it once!

[whichwayyoulean]

Fine, I'll try it. Once.