001

[littlesoul]

[She's perched on the highest spot she can find in the lobby, her journal clutched against her chest. This isn't anything like she's used to, nothing feels familiar. Her heart is beating hard in her chest and her hands want to start shaking.

Her mind is racing, filled with the thoughts of so many people around her. The night before, she had achieved some kind of calm, she remembered that, but now, with this new, strange turn of events, she's falling again, lost amidst the sea of thoughts around her.

She scribbles in her journal at a feverish pace, the words small and pushed together as she tries to hold back panic.]

Lost.

Lost, lost, lost, lost.

Fell into the black and landed here. Fell and fell and fell until I hit the ground. I can't remember how to get back, too lost to see clearly.

Can someone pick her up again? Can someone put her back where she belongs?

Too loud.

Can't go high enough, can't find a way out, can't find anything that I want.

Ship, she needs a ship again. She needs the sky.

Comments

[silentrunning]

[Her mind was soft, yes. And smooth. A bit like a rock, probably. All stubbornness, determination, but kindness under it, and the impression that there had been attempts to break her most likely.

She reads River's words, and nods sympathetically. She understands the sentiment. Slowly she writes another message.]

I feel the same, though not much of what I knew is worth seeing again. But I'm sure that you will see people you know again. People come and go here, and come back again. You may not remember, but you've been here before. If you go back far enough in the journals, you'll find yourself I think. But every time someone comes here, the Castle takes something valuable from them. And I'm sorry you have to be put through that.

[Chell's beginning to wonder about this girl. She's wondering if she's been tested too, as she'd never known her when she was here last.]

[littlesoul]

[She frowns at the words, considering them for a long moment before nodding] Very rude. [Her hands are shaking though, uncomfortable with the thought of something, anything at all really, breaking into her ind and taking things away. She's had enough of that thank you.

Instead she concentrates on Chell, on her mind. Smooth like a rock, yes. Like a stone you would use play with. There are small cracks, rough patches but nothing sharp, nothing that could cut, only places that have been cut themselves.

Testing is a good word for what River went through and she wonders if, somewhere, Cell had not experienced something similar. If there was someone uelse who understood what it was like to be broken into and broken down..]

[silentrunning]

[Chell nods.]

It IS rude. I hate it here. As if Aperture wasn't bad enough... But at least here I have free will... Or the closest thing to it I have ever known...

[Yup. She understands]

[littlesoul]

[River frowns, unsure of what to say to that.[ Lots of things are rude, won't let you do what you want. Be who you are meant to be.