River Tam (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
littlesoul) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
paradisa2013-03-13 07:42 pm
littlesoul) wrote in paradisa2013-03-13 07:42 pm
001
[She's perched on the highest spot she can find in the lobby, her journal clutched against her chest. This isn't anything like she's used to, nothing feels familiar. Her heart is beating hard in her chest and her hands want to start shaking.
Her mind is racing, filled with the thoughts of so many people around her. The night before, she had achieved some kind of calm, she remembered that, but now, with this new, strange turn of events, she's falling again, lost amidst the sea of thoughts around her.
She scribbles in her journal at a feverish pace, the words small and pushed together as she tries to hold back panic.]
Lost.
Lost, lost, lost, lost.
Fell into the black and landed here. Fell and fell and fell until I hit the ground. I can't remember how to get back, too lost to see clearly.
Can someone pick her up again? Can someone put her back where she belongs?
Too loud.
Can't go high enough, can't find a way out, can't find anything that I want.
Ship, she needs a ship again. She needs the sky.
Her mind is racing, filled with the thoughts of so many people around her. The night before, she had achieved some kind of calm, she remembered that, but now, with this new, strange turn of events, she's falling again, lost amidst the sea of thoughts around her.
She scribbles in her journal at a feverish pace, the words small and pushed together as she tries to hold back panic.]
Lost.
Lost, lost, lost, lost.
Fell into the black and landed here. Fell and fell and fell until I hit the ground. I can't remember how to get back, too lost to see clearly.
Can someone pick her up again? Can someone put her back where she belongs?
Too loud.
Can't go high enough, can't find a way out, can't find anything that I want.
Ship, she needs a ship again. She needs the sky.
no subject
Shaking her head, she looks out into the room.] Not as harsh here. I can almost think again. [She laughs because it's not entirely true. She can rarely think straight and the castle still pounds in the back of her head but the stories soothed her a bit ad his presence is a calming one.[ I'll find a place. Don't worry. You've got people to keep yourself.
no subject
[Mildmay doesn't like that memory, and sets it aside. Back to Jeanne-Terr. People gotta make their own way, even if they're crazy. He'll let her alone, for now.]
[But first...] Okay. Look, my name's Mildmay. [He hopes she isn't the type of crazy you get in stories, where people repeat what they've been told at the worst moment. Felix wasn't like that, anyway, so maybe crazy people aren't really like that, and it's all just stories.] Or Gilroi, some people'll call me. If'n you need me, I can try and help as I can. Or just if'n you wanna hear more stories. I got loads. [He doesn't smile-- the scar would make that action cruel-- but there's a lightness in his eyes, a kindness. He likes being around Jeanne-Terr. She's like Margot's littlest badgers, sort of. She don't treat him like a murderer. 'Course, that's 'cause she's batty, but you gotta get on how best you can. And it's better'n sitting around Felix's friends, trying to figure out what they're planning and why they want Mildmay to play the mummer's role in it.]
[He stands.] So just holler if you need me, okay?
no subject
I'll find you again. For stories, for peace.
[Then she moves, wrapping her arms around him for a brief moment, careful not to throw him off balance.]
no subject
[He's so shocked he forgets to hug back, and kicks himself for it a little, later.] Um. Okay. See you, then. [Awkward as a three-legged cat. He waves at her like the idiot he is, and he leaves.]