paradisa | thirty-sixth twist of the coil

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nikola tesla

thirty-sixth twist of the coil

So, we had stains on our bodies representing our regrets and doubts and whatever, and then elephants came to wash said stains away. Makes as much sense as anything in this castle, really. After two years, I really shouldn't question anything anymore.

[Tesla lets out a slight huff, before continuing:]

Anyways, so we have an expedition going on, or something. Here's probably where I tell you the whole "bon voyage" schtick , but frankly? Im not feeling up to it. Instead, have a few words of advice:

If it looks dangerous, don't bring it back to the castle.

If it looks too good to be true, don't bring it back to the castle.

Just...don't bring back anything to the castle which looks like it could cause ten million people to keel over and die without warning. I'm talking strange "magical" artifacts and the like which look harmless but are actually not. The last thing we need is an uprising of a version of the bubonic plague on our hands in a confined area like this one.

This has been a helpful public service announcement by yours truly.

[Filtered to James Watson]

You know what I just said before? Disregard that. Bring back anything you want, as long as a) it's not a large creature you can' sneak in through the lobby doors without people noticing and b) it doesn't have the taste for human flesh.

Yes, that can apply to inanimate objects as well. Don't ask me how, something like a flesh-eating bowling ball probably exists out there, as far as I know. This place is that idiotic.

And before you ask, it's because I'm bored and I need new things to experiment on, okay? Totally valid reason.

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You do realize Maladict specifically requested I don't, yes? [Not that he had any intention of following the rules but hey, he had to point it out.]

Yes, and...? Come on, James, surely old age hasn't addled your mind enough for you to forget how to smuggle things inside places.

No, certainly not, just saying so I can't be yelled at when I return that you weren't aware about it if she ever catches word of it. Not that I had any intention of listening to her of course.

Good man. I knew you still had some hint of rebellion in you.

Oh, we'll jump that hurdle when we reach it. Believe me, I know how to keep a few things secret.

You, yes. It's Helen I'm worried about catching wind of the entire thing, Ashley's with me and you know how Helen gets.

So? Come on, you can't seriously be telling me you're afraid of Helen finding out.

You can't tel me you're honestly not afraid of such a thing, considering who she knows here.

Yeah, well...whatever her punishment is can't possibly be worse than what the castle has put us through.

...Says the man that's historically called the celibate scientist. [HE WOULD LIKE TO GET LAID NIKOLA.]

[you can't see it BUT TOTALLY ROLLING HIS EYES OVER HERE

Hey, that changed over time, alright? I couldn't remain celibate forever.

[You've got a life to go back to if one of the ladies kills you, he doesn't. Gosh.]

I'd rather not go through similar here, you understand? Helen could make my life difficult in that regard, and while the castle is annoying that is worse in many ways.

...

What, so, you're afraid of angering her because it means you won't get to spend a night in her room?

I don't even know what to say to that. James, you have changed. Usually thoughts like that would make you go into convulsions or something.

I like to blame the influence of yourself and your fiancee for it, at least I'm speaking my mind at the moment.

Oh, so basically, since we're doing it, you decided to be a copycat? Is that what you're saying?

Don't flatter yourself, Nikola, you're hardly the type of gentleman I'm interested in copying.

....Wow is everyone intent on ruining every piece of interesting fun here or what?

[ sulking? her? never. ]

[ROLLING EYES FOREVER]

Hey, I don't want a repeat of that "everyone gets extremely angry about things" virus we had a while ago. That was something I don't want to go through again.

So basically, take all the precaution you can.

[ WOW RUDE TESLA. ]

What the hell was that and how does it even work?

Yeah, fine. I'll keep people in one piece, geeze.

I don't know. Which is pretty much my answer to "how does anything in this dumb castle work in the first place".

Good. I don't think people will appreciate you ruining their lives forever, I'm glad you're so thoughtful about their well-being.

Wow, giving up already?

I'm not the life-ruiner. Maybe you should look into that. I did promise to make sure they come back alive. That's what I'm sticking with.

Not quite, but after two years of this stuff, you kind of learn to begrudgingly accept things as they are.

Okay, then you better keep that promise. Make sure James doesn't fall into any pitholes he's overlooked, stuff like that.

... [ okay so she thinks she gets what he's saying. but she's not entirely sure.

is he screwing with her?

he's screwing with her.

maybe.

she thinks.

IF HE COULD SEE HER FACE. ]

Dude, I will. No one's gonna die on my watch.

[YOU WILL NEVER KNOW]

How many people are you playing babysitter to, anyways?

Just one. Specifically. [ take a guess as to which one that was. ] But I did say I'd keep them all safe.

Ah.

[He knows exactly who that is.]

What, even the strangers?

...Why not?

[ ashley, your face is going to get stuck like that. ]

I don't know, I was curious. Most people wouldn't care about a bunch of strangers and their lives.

Yeah, well... [ he's got a point, but even so. ] Consider my mom and her protecting life ideals. Besides... at least I'll be doing something good.

[ be honored she's being honest with you, tesla. ]

So she rubbed off on you, is that what you're saying? True, Helen has been the selfless sort when she needs to be...

...

[ was that a dig at both her and her mother?

...that totally was.

jerk. ]

Yeah, she is selfless. And she taught me to respect life.

[ dude this is not the time to start on helen. don't even go there. ]

[If she could see that filter, buddy :|]

I think a general 'don't bring anything back to the castle' works best. People find loopholes.

[And by 'people' she means 'James']

Yes, well, people are crafty little weasels. They'd do anything to go against the rules.

Yes. I have noticed.

A lot. [Could that be directed at him? At herself? It could be either of them, really]

Ha. Learned that from personal experience, I bet?

[A little hum]

Something like that.

Well, either way, we'll make sure James and company don't do something they highly regret. I don't want any more trouble like last time.

I'm glad you agree with me. Really glad.

I think the day you finally stop questioning the shit that goes on here, is the day you've finally lost all sanity. This is why I plan on never stopping. I may not be able to beat 'em, but I sure as fuck ain't joining them, either.

That said, it's my first expedition. What kind of dangerous shit is supposedly out there, anyway?

Yes, well, I would've thought the same two years ago, but after a while you just have to grin and bear it, I'm afraid. It has nothing to do with your sanity- believe me, me being insane would probably spell out bad things for everybody.

[He had a loss where he was a mad scientist and he tried to kill everyone with tesla coils in the lobby. Not fun for the people involved.]

Oh, all sorts of things. Creatures that want to kill you, people who want to kill you...it's a pretty hostile world out there, from what I've heard.

I'm not gonna disagree with you there. I can definitely imagine what it would be like if you were insane. [And yet somehow, the idea is intriguing. Scary, yeah, but intriguing.]

Sounds right up my alley, though. I'm pretty used to defending myself against hostile shit.

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thirty-sixth twist of the coil

Nikola Tesla

James Watson

Nikola Tesla

James Watson

Nikola Tesla

James Watson

Nikola Tesla

James Watson

Nikola Tesla

James Watson

Nikola Tesla

James Watson WOW HTML FAIL

Nikola Tesla IT'S OKAY

James Watson

Nikola Tesla

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dictated forever

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