Article 1

[bro_codebreaker]

[morning brings the usual ambient noise over the journal: the rustle of bedsheets, the unmistakeable groan of someone who is decidedly hung over, the slow shuffle of feet over generic New Castle Room carpet. normally, a new arrival would be freaking out a little more at this point, but this is hardly the first time Barney Stinson has woken up in a different place than he fell asleep the night before. he staggers into the bathroom and regards himself in the mirror]

Ugh. This was such a bad idea. Of all the colors. Stupid Murtaugh list. I wish I hadn't dyed my hair pink.

[there is a spectacular, shuddering yelp of surprise as, per castle mechanics, the wish is granted]

Whoa.

[he reaches up and puts both hands to his head, then checks the mirror to make sure it's not some sort of trick. okay. okay, he's found a genie somewhere. this is cool. this is awesome. but it is a theory that needs testing]

Okay, okay, wait, hang on a second, here. I wish .... for a diamond pinstriped bespoke Savile Row suit.

[POOF. One Suit Acquired. he lets out a high-pitched gasp comparable to someone who was just told they won the lottery]

Whoa. ... CRAP, I've only got one left. Uhm. Um. ... I gotta really make this count. I wiiiiiish .....? Forrrrrrr....

[there is a period of intense, life-changing concentration before a slow smirk spreads over his face and Barney nods to himself, slowly. yeah. yeeeeeah, that's it. perfect.]

All twelve models from the 1999 Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Calendar.

[expectant pause.]

OH COME ON, WHAT A GYP!

Comments

Dicated

[onlyanapple]

[Crowley's been avoiding the castle since he got his senses back, staying far away, staying in the dead zone as much as possible, only going over the border into the live zone when he needed his powers to make hunger and thirst a thing not to worry about.

He saw Gale's entry about him, but didn't speak up. He needs to be away from all of them right now. Especially THAT HOUSE because she lives there too.

But his voice...this one is enough to make him pause and stare at the journal. The name leaves his lips before he can even think about it]

...Barney?

[bro_codebreaker]

... [he whirls around at the sound of the unfamiliar voice]

Dude, magic genie. What gives. Why no models?

Dictated

[i_got_this]

[While she's not really in the mood to be replying to anyone outside of certain people, she can't give up the chance to pick on fresh meat.]

1. You're in a magic castle.
2. You can't go home.
3. You lost something.
4. Kitchen's on the first floor.

[bro_codebreaker]

5. You're not a genie, are you.

Filtered

[the_effect_she_has]

[What. The. Hell.]

Are you mad? Don't go wishing for things like that! The castle will take it's payment in you!

[bro_codebreaker]

Oh, so it goes on my tab? Don't worry, I got like, five platinum cards.

dictated

[unvarnished]

What the-- what are you doing? Stop wishing!

[bro_codebreaker]

[indignantly] Well I will now, it stopped working.

[originalcopy]

Hey man, keep going... I've always wondered what happens when someone makes too many big wishes here.

oh god I am so sorry, he's an idiot

[bro_codebreaker]

So wait, the wishes only work on small stuff? What, is the genie Jewish or something?

[cyan_maid]

[The amazement at wishing? Yep, that pings Jane's Newbie Alert, but instead of being kind and welcoming, you get a string of laughter from this end of the journal. Breathless, joyous "Hoo hoo hoo"s.

You're welcome. :B]

[bro_codebreaker]

.... Great, my genie's a troll.

YEAH, REAL FUNNY, can I get my models now or what?

Voice

[honeytoes]

Oh sorry dude...that shit doesn't work.

I tried it with the 2001 calender models...all I got were a bunch of lousy paper cut outs.

[bro_codebreaker]

UGH. So we got the cheap genie. It figures. ... What are you, on the other side of the suite or something?

[ino]

[ cheerfully ]

Barney! You're back!

[bro_codebreaker]

[we will just say that by now he has had his conversation with Crowley, yes?]

Uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhyeah. Hi. What up?

[kungfuwitch]

[Wait. Waaaaaaaaaaaait. Oh this definitely starts to make up for all the crap the castle's thrown their way the past few weeks. Phoebe crosses the livingroom of the apartment where she and Peter had been living, picking up her journal with a smile]

Well look who the cat dragged in.

[bro_codebreaker]

Only the most awesome thing since catnip. Hi there. I'm Barney. Are you December? Do I just have to like, let you in or something?

Dictated!

[bezazzled]

Yeah, I tried wishing for a boy band when I first got here. It didn't work, either.

[bro_codebreaker]

[as though this is a Very Important Question] Which one?

[heloise]

[ Oh but she knows that voice even though the name doesn't come so easily to her. But then-- ]

You could wish for a television.

[bro_codebreaker]

That'd be a waste, especially when I can just call room service and get one.

[luxe_can_kill]

[Have a soothing Tara Platt voice]

I believe wishing for people are off-limits.

[bro_codebreaker]

[well hellooooo.]. So I still have one left, mysterious voice?

[kindnessing]

[ -- oh. OH. SORRY THAT IS DEFINITELY THE CLATTER OF A LOT OF BOOKS COMING DOWN IN A CASCADE AS SOMEONE TRIES TO GET PAST HIS RESEARCH MATERIAL TO GET AT HIS JOURNAL. ]

Barney? Barney Stinson?

[bro_codebreaker]

Go for Barney, what up?