paradisa | ( first )

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joel

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[Immediately after he woke up, he began to panic. This was the wrong place to be. He was alone and some piece of shit took his watch -- his watch, Jesus Christ, why? It was broken, it wasn't worth anything to anyone but him. He swears under his breath and envisions a slow death for the party responsible while he moves through the giant castle like an angry shadow.

Normally he knows how not to be seen, but with the confusing events clouding over his judgment he's moving a bit too fast. It's huge in here. He's nowhere near Tommy's camp anymore, that's for sure. What he needs to do is push forward and search every area for Ellie, just keep searching until he finds the little girl he's lost somewhere along the way. Again.

If you are unfortunate enough to bump into Joel first, he's got a backpack full of weapons and explosives and a hell of a lot of snap judgments to make about anyone he might run into. It might not look like the start of a friendly encounter.

But he has no idea to expect magic from anyone or anything. You're all normal, fallible civilians, right?]

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[If it was anyone other than Ellie telling him this, he'd start dismissing them and walking away right about now. Magic, right. Time-warping magic. But she says she's been here for two weeks and she knows she wasn't missing from Tommy's at the same time. And she wasn't. She hadn't been. Just yesterday he'd seen her, just yesterday they'd been doing chores at the plant and eating with Tommy and Maria, living as normal as they could.

Just-- just what the hell? Joel takes a step back and pinches at the bridge of his nose, crosses an arm over his chest. He needs a breather now. This didn't feel like a weird dream, but it sure sounded like one.]

This is crazy. You're sure about all this? [He refocuses on her and speaks the next part quietly, a very slight tremble in his voice:] Ellie, what about infected? Or hunters? If it's impossible to escape, that means we're trapped with all them too.

[Because there was no way to be trapped and be safe at the same time. At least at Tommy's, he knew they could run away if the place ever went to hell. They could always run away and try to start over somewhere new. A magic time-warping castle sounded more like a prison than paradise. 'Paradisa.'

Jesus Christ. Maybe in another minute he'd wake up and all this weirdness would vanish.]

If I didn't see it with my own eyes, I'd call total bullshit on this magic crap too, believe me. But it just sort of happened and...

[She's still not sure how exactly she should be handling the revelation that magic is real. She's still trying to wrap her head around it and every time she thinks about it too much, she starts getting a headache.]

... The Infected aren't here. I've seen enough of this castle in the past two weeks and I haven't seen a single one. Nobody else I've talked to even knows what the Infected are.

[She sounds shocked really, and for good reason. For someone like her, who was born after the fungal virus broke out and was quickly razing humanity to the ground, the thought that people didn't know what the Infected were, that there were people who were born in a world without those monsters... it's almost incomprehensible.]

[No infected? The breakout was global, there was no such thing as 'no infected.' But she wouldn't lie about something like that. Her genuine shock and her assertion that they don't exist here forces Joel to blink hard. He stares at her for a long moment, words failing him.]

No infected. [Again, if it wasn't Ellie telling him this he wouldn't believe it. He knows what life was like before 'em- what life was supposed to be like for everyone, but after living with runners and clickers for twenty-one years he can scarcely believe it.

He doesn't know if he buys it, even now. It's too good to be true.]

Do you reckon it took us back in time?

[It sounds completely insane and he can barely register the words coming out of his mouth, but given their messed up timelines he thinks that's the most likely explanation. And easier to believe than a whole different universe, somehow.]

Dunno. Maybe? There's enough weird magic shit going on here that I wouldn't really be surprised.

[Ellie sort of wonders if this is what going crazy feels like. Believing in shit like magic? And time travel? What's next, aliens? OH WAIT NO SHE MET SOMEONE FROM ANOTHER PLANET ALREADY fuck she's totally gone.]

But... I don't think that's what's going on. There are a couple of people I've talked to... it sounds like they've run into things similar to the Infected. But instead of a virus taking them over, they just... come back to life after they die.

[People that don't stay dead when they die... now that's a whole new nightmare that Ellie just knows is going to haunt her one night.]

[At that, he shoots her a sidelong look that is clearly uncomfortable. He didn't like the sound of that, not one little bit. It wasn't too different from their situation, but it was unfamiliar territory and therefore he was spooked.

Sounded a lot like proper zombies, actually. Joel can barely remember the movies and television shows he watched back then, now that he's so used to his life being removed from that timeframe entirely, but the word trickles back to him now. Distant memories. Watching flicks with little brother after hours when they were supposed to be in bed.

Cracking jokes about how stupid the things looked.]

Are there any around here?

[Oh, she can understand that look. She's sure she had that same look on her face when Lee and Ben had both told her about their "walkers". The Infected... yeah, they were scary. But by now, they were familiar. The dead rising? That's totally different, and that's enough to freak her out just a bit.]

No. Those guys were some of the people that were telling me this place is safe [which she doesn't completely believe] and if they went through similar shit that we did dealing with their monsters, I can't really see them lying about something that dangerous being here or not. So... I trust them when they say that.

[Well, you can never be too careful, kid. He hrms over her statement.]

Who knows. This all feels pretty fucking unpredictable. [To say the least.] Alright, I'll bite. Most people gather here from different universes or somethin' and the castle runs on magic.

Does that about sum everything up?

[Especially for a natural skeptic and straight-talker like Joel, it's rather difficult to lay those words out seriously. And yet.]

Yyyyep. And if you're still doubting the whole "magic is real" thing, I can totally prove it to you. Just as long as you don't flip the fuck out after.

[Sighing and shaking his head all over the place. It was totally unreal was what it was.]

Shoot.

Alrighty then. Nothing up my sleeves, right? [She rolls up her left sleeve for emphasis, leaving the right one down for... obvious reasons.]

It's all as simple as wishing for it. Just gotta say that I wish for... [nothing big nothing big] a pair of socks.

[Ta-daa! There is suddenly a nice clean pair of fluffy white socks in Ellie's hand.]

Pretty freaky, huh?

[God, this kid. He loves her so damn much. A thought that does not make itself obvious while he stares like he expects nothing at all, and then stares in shock when socks materialize out of nowhere.

His gaze shifts left and right. He takes a step in and peers at the socks uneasily.]

I'll be damned. [He promised he wouldn't freak out, but this is very freaky.] Works for anything at all?

Works for food and clothes, definitely. Anything else? I haven't really tried it yet. I had someone tell me it works with medicine, but... [She shakes her head.] I don't totally trust this shit yet.

... no, I wouldn't either. [It's difficult to trust even that pair of nice clean socks, not knowing where the fuck they came from or how.] Pretty fucking unbelievable, though.

[He tries to pluck the socks right out of her hands, wanting to examine them over for authenticity. Repeats her choice of phrasing aloud:] Freaky.

Seriously. Not gunna lie, I freaked out a bit when it first happened.

[A pause, then she grins a very mischievous grin.] The first time I did it, I was joking about wishing for a pair of boots to shove up some guy's ass. Still have the boots back in my room.

[Oh Ellie...]

[Yup, they're real. Real socks that she made pop out of the sky. He flips them over and stares harder like that he might find the explanation somewhere on them if he does, hrming to Ellie distractedly for a moment instead of focusing on what she was saying.

Then it clicks. He looks up.] Why? Did he do anything to you?

[Oh Joel.]

He was just being an ass. Totally mocking me. He deserved it.

[And he managed to set her off by telling her that one of his nicknames for kids in the tower translated to something only Joel would call her, but that had come after.]

Hm. Did you do anything to set him off first?

[He slowly shifts from concerned to somewhat less concerned. Somewhat. If he's being honest with himself, Ellie probably did.]

Wow, seriously? I did nothing wrong! [She sounds offended, Joel! But.... she does have to pause just a minute to remember if... she did say anything...]

All I did was doubt his claim that there was magic in this place. He was the first person I ran into, so of course I was gunna doubt the utter bullshit he was spewing. Then he had to mock me, so of course I was gunna say something back to him!

Alright, alright. [Amused, Joel gestures to her to calm down.] I can't really blame you for that. I've just seen it with my own eyes and this shit's still hard to believe.

[And that stranger shouldn't have made fun of her for it. He's having a hard time adjusting, but he can only imagine how much harder this would be without Ellie here. There'd probably be a trail of dead people behind him right now if he hadn't found her as quick as he did. The thought sobers him up and his next words a little soft.]

It had to be tough waking up here all on your own, kiddo.

[Sorry, he wants to say, but instead it skirts under the surface. Sorry I wasn't there.]

That's a gigantic understatement right there.

[Ellie's shoulders slump, and her expression falls into a frown. It had only been two weeks (or thirteen days exactly) but it had felt so much longer. And waking up that first day...]

It sucks, waking up alone.

[All her life, she was never really alone when she woke. There were always plenty of kids in the orphanages she had lived in, and like them or not, they were still human presences surrounding her. Then there was the short time where she actually had a friend, and it was comforting knowing she was only a few bunks away. After that there was Joel, who was always within arm's length when they stopped for the night. Even during the harsh winter weeks when he was barely holding on, he was still there.

The only time she ever really woke up alone was when she woke up in David's cage. So yeah, it wasn't a very pleasant feeling.]

... I was worried. [And she would never admit this with anyone else, but...] And scared.

[It's not like he had any control over it in reality, but he still feels terrible. He's not supposed to just disappear on her, barring acts of God-- well, he supposes this sorta thing might just qualify. But that doesn't make Ellie's slump or the fear in her voice okay and it doesn't make her words sting any less. Joel feels an urge to crouch down and pull her into a hug, strong enough that it nearly surprises him, but instead he steadies a hand on her shoulder and admits to the same.]

Me too, babygirl.

[Much softer now. He can't put into words just how fucking terrified he was, waking up without her anywhere in sight. The look on his face tells a little of that story. It was bad enough in winter, but after what he'd been through with the Fireflies he didn't even want to think about two weeks stuck in this joint without any way to know that she was alright.

Hell. It would've been hell.]

But I'm here now. I ain't goin' anywhere.

[Well, Joel doesn't have to fight the urge to hug her for long, because in one quick movement, Ellie wraps her arms around him, hands curling tight into the back of his shirt and face pressed against his chest.]

Good. [Her voice is slightly muffled by his shirt, but she keeps talking anyway.] If you do, I'll just hunt you down and kick your ass.

[A brief flicker of surprise is quickly replaced by a ridiculous amount of warmth that starts somewhere in the center of his chest and spreads out. He can scarcely believe the effect it has on him, a simple hug from this little girl. It wasn't so simple, though; they'd been separated, something that neither of them were used to. He cups one hand against the back of her head and closes his other arm over the back of her shoulders, leaning down to pull her in tight.

This was a kid he'd barely been able to exchange two words with at one point. One he'd tried so hard to keep at a distance. He'd seen Sarah in her over and over again, but that's not who she was and that's not what this was for him. Close, but uniquely different. Joel chuckles a little at her weak threat, pulling back to look her in the eye.

Absently, he brushes a strand of hair away from her face.]

Nah, I'm stickin' around. Still gotta teach you how to swim, don't I?

[Now that gets her to smile and laugh a bit. She smacks him on the shoulder again, but unlike last time, there's no force behind it at all.]

Yeah, and not just that. You told me you were gunna teach me how to play a guitar, too. And I still haven't heard you sing!

[She will get Joel to sing if it's the last thing she ever does, goddamnit.]

[A smirk.]

And you never will.

[The swimming lessons and the guitar lessons he was on board with, but even for her there would be no singing. Not as long as he was in control of all his inhibitions.]

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