[Ouch. Joel can be as blunt as he likes, but taking it gracefully is a different story. The words strike at too many different raw nerves all at once, but there's so much tired sadness behind them that he pauses before reacting. Tess sounds so beaten down by the years that he grasps at his thoughts for a way to fix it, but comes up empty. He knew he was too.
She's not my daughter, he thinks, first and foremost. His daughter was dead and Ellie is not. His eyes search the ground, shuttering to half-lids.
He still doesn't know how to explain it to her.] It's -- it's not like that. [Distracted, and he remembers telling the same thing to Bill when he accused him of babysitting. Bullshit, he'd been told, and here he'd probably hear the same thing.]
That's not how I want you to see it. [So he starts over and he tries his fucking hardest to be calm, to stay even. Ellie is rocky territory, but he doesn't want Tess to believe she's off limits if they're going to keep trying honest discussion time. To think that he's not interested in being her partner anymore. It stings, but he's not sure which part hurts most.] I really seem that different now to you?
[He can't see it as easily as someone else, but then he thinks back to what he told Tess about the Fireflies and he realizes he must.]
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She's not my daughter, he thinks, first and foremost. His daughter was dead and Ellie is not. His eyes search the ground, shuttering to half-lids.
He still doesn't know how to explain it to her.] It's -- it's not like that. [Distracted, and he remembers telling the same thing to Bill when he accused him of babysitting. Bullshit, he'd been told, and here he'd probably hear the same thing.]
That's not how I want you to see it. [So he starts over and he tries his fucking hardest to be calm, to stay even. Ellie is rocky territory, but he doesn't want Tess to believe she's off limits if they're going to keep trying honest discussion time. To think that he's not interested in being her partner anymore. It stings, but he's not sure which part hurts most.] I really seem that different now to you?
[He can't see it as easily as someone else, but then he thinks back to what he told Tess about the Fireflies and he realizes he must.]