Discovery of Loss

[traken_master]

[The Master doesn't generally celebrate Earth holidays, but there are one or two he finds acceptable. Today, he has decided to honor April Fool's Day and play a prank on the Doctor...a harmless one this time. Naturally, this requires a disguise! The Master is very talented at disguises...or he used to be. He's tried several on, but, looking in the mirror, he notices that all of them...fail, somehow. No matter what he does, he is clearly recognizable! At first he is puzzled, but then, to his horror, he remembers what he has been told about all residents experiencing a "loss." Horror turns to rage. His journal is open, since he finds the background chatter of the castle both entertaining and informative, but that doesn't matter to him, as he begins yelling.]

YOU PERNICIOUS PILE OF ROCK! I'LL TEAR YOU DOWN PIECE BY PIECE FOR THIS!

Comments

[traken_master]

No, Doctor, my eloquence is perfectly intact.

[cricketycricket]

So I hear. ... What isn't, then? Since you're obviously quite broken up about it.

[traken_master]

I've lost my ability to disguise myself. Why? What use could this idiotic castle have for that?

[cricketycricket]

[the fact that he has to fight off the instinct to laugh is answer enough for him] I've one word for you: schadenfreude.

[traken_master]

Are you referring to the castle or to yourself?

[cricketycricket]

[somewhat grumpily, because really, you try and explain something and get banter. ugh. no, this is not the way he likes having serious conversations. get with it, man]

The castle. It likes seeing its residents agitated.

Likely why you're here in the first place.

[traken_master]

[The Master grins at the grumpy tone, but then considers what the Doctor is saying.]

You know, Mr. Henshaw and I made a similar observation. The personality of the castle is rather childish. There doesn't seem to be any rational reason behind its actions, only a playful sort of spite.

[cricketycricket]

[oh, so you two have met. that's great. that's just what he needed in his life. thanks, Paradisa. the Master and the insane man who communes with machinery.]

Yes, well, that much was obvious to me from my first week here. Just wait until you've formed any sort of concrete hypothesis ...

[traken_master]

Give me some time, Doctor, and I shall. I was merely making conversation. It's gratifying to know that you agree with me.

[cricketycricket]

That's not quite what I mean. ... You'll find you won't be able to thoroughly express those theories, neither aloud, nor in writing.

[traken_master]

[The Master frowns.]

Then, the castle is actively trying to keep us from discovering it's secrets. I had hoped it was more passive.

[cricketycricket]

Oh, it's anything but passive. It brought us all here, after all, did it not?

[traken_master]

True, but that, by itself, wasn't proof of intent.

[cricketycricket]

And what makes you say that? The fact that it brings us all in continuously seems like a rather clear intent, to me.

[traken_master]

Wooly thinking, Doctor. The castle's thinking is far different from anything even you or I are used to. The residents might be a mere side effect of some purpose we don't yet understand. This is the first evidence I've heard that the Castle cares about our actions.

[cricketycricket]

You do realize you just called yourself a side effect. [he's amused, can you tell?]

[traken_master]

[Cute, Doctor, very cute.]

Excellent, Doctor, your hearing is intact, though, I must say, your wit is a bit dull. You must be so glad I'm here for you to sharpen it on.

[cricketycricket]

Oh yes, because clearly a metaphorical whetstone was the thing I needed most in my life here.

[traken_master]

Clearly. With enough mental stimulation, I may even get you thinking rationally, again.

[cricketycricket]

That's more than a little presumptuous of you, wouldn't you say? If we're on the subject of who's acting like themselves, I suppose it's fair game to wonder where the grandiose scheme is. Waiting in the wings still, after this long?

[traken_master]

Be patient, Doctor. I am, after all, newly arrived and the rules here are quite different from our home universe. I had millenia there to study and learn the way of things. Surely you'll give me more than a month or two here to catch up?

[cricketycricket]

[he only took a month, and that was with a world change in his first week. pardon him if he sounds just a lot smug]

Ohhhh, very well, if you insist.

[traken_master]

[The Master scowls. The Doctor has never appreciated the planning and care of the Master's schemes. It's one of the things that drives the Master to punish his best enemy.]

How kind of you. I'll be sure to come up with something suitable for your high standards.

[cricketycricket]

[he'd appreciate that cunning mind of yours if you put it to less destructive use, old friend, and you know it.]

Well, I suppose I'll be waiting, then, won't I.

[traken_master]

[He admits nothing.]

I suppose you shall be. Of course...I'd prefer to defeat you in my home reality, not here.