paradisa | v λ education

["Clinic," she had begun saying, every time he got too close to her.

He liked a lot of things about Stephanie Brown, so he wasn't going to let a stupid thing like that bother him too much, but he was a little offended that she thought he a) was diseased and b) didn't know anything about protection. Sure, he was from a time where prostitutes could carry bugs, but he avoided those ones. And protection? Pfft. He might not have known about modern protection, but there was pulling out, and ah, tra le cosce. To his knowledge, he'd never gotten a woman pregnant. Why should he worry now?

He'd also pointed out to her that the women he'd already slept with in Paradisa hadn't given him any long lectures about protection nor quizzed him about disease, but she was adamant. Clinic, clinic, clinic.

Ezio wasn't even planning on sleeping with her, and she still demanded he to go to the clinic, no matter what his excuses were.

So, finally, he sulks his way down to the clinic and lets himself in. It's a bizarre place, unlike any doctor's house in his time. Everything seems so nice and clean, and there are no blood stains on the floor. That's nice. And, as Crowley had told him, there is a large mural of Eden on the wall. Interesting.

But is anyone here? If there was no one here, he can tell Steph that there was no one there. That'd be nice.

He has to be able to say he tried, though.]

... Hello?

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[ John had been asleep sitting behind a desk with his head resting against the palm of his hand. He had spent most of the night before wandering aimlessly in an attempt to expel the excess energy he had built up (sleeping in a deadly quiet abode proved to be more difficult than he thought). It wasn't a deep sleep and thus the voice jerked him awake (or maybe it was the fact his head was moments away from falling off his hand) with a slur of groggy mumblings.

He wasn't asleep on the job, not at all. You can prove nothing. ]

Ah... [ It's a relief to see, after he rubs some of the sleep from his eyes, that the source of the sound isn't in fact House but instead someone else entirely. ] Hello.

[Damn. Ezio approaches a few paces.]

Are doctors supposed to be sleeping on the job?

It's a slow day.

[So he definitely won't be told "sorry, no time today" and be able to just leave. Huh. The otherwise empty clinic could have told him that, really, but Ezio felt like he was looking for excuses.]

There aren't many people in the castle, I suppose...

[Ugh. He folds his arms.]

What year is it, in your world? I've been told to see someone with "modern" medical experience.

Or they've all decided not to pick a fight with the electrical devices.

[ He doesn't mind it, it gives him a moment to catch a bit of shut eye. ]

It was 2010 the last time I checked.

[That feels like eons away from him, but it's in Stephanie's range, isn't it? He nods.]

In my time, it is 1488. [He pulls up a seat to sit across from the doctor.] And, uh... I have no health problems at present, but a friend of mine was concerned about my... hobbies, so she asked me to visit the clinic.

Hobbies. [ He repeats, shifting in his chair. There's only a few conclusions one could come too, all awkward in some way, especially considering the man in front of him is supposedly from the Renaissance. ]

Right. So she wants you to get information then?

[He shrugs.]

Something like that. She believes that there are many diseases one can get from dalliances with women, and that there is something to protect oneself from them. Sex diseases are not common, in my time, and we have methods of preventing pregnancy... do people in your time lack those methods?

[No sex diseases yet, anyway. Thanks a lot, Naples' syphilis outbreak of 1494. All of Europe hates you.]

Edited 2012-01-23 01:08 (UTC)

No, no, we have... methods. They're likely more advanced than the ones you know. [ Feel that? It's a heavy cloud of AWKWARD settling on the room. ]

[House pops his head up from...wherever he was.]

So you're looking for a condom? [He turns to John.] Are we now working for Planned Parenthood?

[Hey man, we're all dudes here. This shouldn't be awkward. Ezio definitely feels it, though, and wonders if he's supposed to be a little less blunt. He turns to look at the other guy, who he hopes is another doctor and not a patient.]

A what? No. We don't have those things in my time. I just want information... and for this girl to stop suggesting I'm diseased.

Edited 2012-01-23 01:36 (UTC)

[ DAMMIT HOUSE. John tenses, casting a frown at House. It was awkward enough, now it's just going to be fifty time worse. Or maybe a hundred. ]

No.

[ He turns his attention back at Ezio. ] We can do some tests to make sure you're not carrying any-- [ Hold on, he needs to cough. Huh that was weird. ]

[THERE IS NO AWKWARD HERE. Okay you two might be a little awkward. House is just gearing up.]

Carrying any what, Dr. Watson? Clap caught in your throat? You'll have to excuse Dr. Watson. He's very new to the clinic setting. [He pats John a couple of times on the back. House is such a concerned colleague.]

[But he's not carrying anything... that he knows of anyway. He glances between the two doctors.]

Are you Dr. Watson's master?

[ --WOAH, HOLD THE PHONE. ]

No! No, he's not.

[At the same time as John's declaration:]

Yes. [Mock-frowning at John now.] Now, Dr. Watson. You know you've just started. You still need me to sign off on your diagnoses.

[Confused, but not being made fun of for his lack of knowledge is a nice subject change.]

If he's still an apprentice, why does he have the title "Doctor"?

I'm not an apprentice. [ WHY IS THIS HAPPENING. ] Don't listen to him.

He's actually a resident. Residents get the title of doctor, but they can't call their own shots yet. We do things a bit differently in the 21st century.

Now go ahead, Dr. Watson. We should test he isn't carrying what?

[Most innocent face ever.]

[He's not sure who to listen to, so he just looks between them and nods.]

I see. But... I don't have any diseases.

[ Give him a second to glare at House. Sir you're picking the worst time to be an ass to him. The worst.

Okay, attention back to Ezio again. ]

We can't know that for sure, you could be carrying a s-- [ He is cut off before he is able to get the words out, only to have something entirely different leave instead. ] In the average lifetime, a person will walk the equivalent of 5 times around the equator.

[ ....

WHAT. ]

[House begs to differ. This seems to be the best time. He tilts his head at John. He has his suspicions as to where that statement came from. He's never heard John speak about anything medical apart from his training. Earlier, he coughed when he tried. That factoid was certainly not planned or expected if the look on his face is to be believed.

This might be very fun.]

[So. Confused.]

I don't get it...

[ No... it can't be.

He opens his mouth to try something else, but alas whatever it was doesn't make it out... only: ] It is physically impossible for a pig to look up at the sky.

[ He coughs again, confusion practically painted across his face. ]

What the hell?

[House is just barely restraining his amusement from leaping onto his face.]

If he's got chancres on Little Italy, what does he likely have?

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/threadhop :D

bracing for amazing

help help i've fallen and i can't get up

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