twenty-two detention slips

[delincuente]

Dude, second year in a row that I've gotten out of the whole surprise parent thing. Looks like even the castle knows I'd make a freaking terrible mom.

[Baby-free Alex is just sitting by the indoor pool, with her toes dipped in the water and a virgin daiquiri in one hand, listening to other residents waking up to babies. It's all very entertaining to her.]

This is, like, totally better than reality TV.

Comments

[waterproofed]

Looks like I missed out again, too.

Dictated forever

[huffythedragon]

I know right? Getting out of this mess is always the best.

[delincuente]

Guess the castle's doing at least one thing right.

[delincuente]

Yeah. Either of us taking care of a baby would be like horror movie material.

[waterproofed]

I donno, I question the parenting skills of some of these adults.

[huffythedragon]

It's bad enough when people have weird losses that make them foals. This is like...a hundred times worse.

[lord_wizard]

What do you mean, reality TV? [TV is like movies and movies are fake, so it's more real than that? Would that make it...real? His head hurts]

[delincuente]

... Yeah, okay. You got a point.

[delincuente]

The heck is a foal?

[delincuente]

It's when, like, cameras just follow around ordinary people who want to get famous for, like, having a ton of kids, or being polygamists, or something like that.

[huffythedragon]

...It's a baby pony.

[delincuente]

Oh. Huh. I always just called those "baby horses".

[huffythedragon]

Oh...well foals is the proper name for them.

[lord_wizard]

...people get famous for that?

[delincuente]

Okay, then. "Foal" losses do pretty much suck.

[delincuente]

Well, yeah. It's pretty weird. This one family has like seventeen kids, or something.

[huffythedragon]

They sure do. I can live without the headache, thank you every much magic castle.

[delincuente]

Yeah, kids really aren't my thing. Never gonna have them, don't want to deal with them.

[huffythedragon]

Wow, never? Really?

[lord_wizard]

Most people would consider that an economic burden, not a cause for fame. Are they some kind of royalty?

[delincuente]

Pfft, no. They're just weirdly religious media hogs.

[delincuente]

Like I really want to have to deal with something that just cries and smells twenty four seven.

[huffythedragon]

...You sure you won't change your mind when you get older?

[delincuente]

Pretty sure. Unless it's an accident or something.

[huffythedragon]

An...accident?

[delincuente]

What, you don't have "Uh-Oh Foals"?

[huffythedragon]

I...don't know what you're talking about.

[delincuente]

[She gives a very attractive snort-laugh at this.]

Ask one of your pony friends. I don't think this is in my job description.

[huffythedragon]

...Is this going to be one of those things they'll say they'll tell me when I'm older?

[lord_wizard]

Have I told you before that your world is very strange?

[delincuente]

We're, like, the only one that doesn't have dragons and crap, and you think we're the strange one?

[... Yeah she is really disrespectful of other cultures.]

[delincuente]

Yeah, probably. You'll figure it out.

[huffythedragon]

...I'm not sure I want to.

[lord_wizard]

Actually, yes, given that my world doesn't have dragons either.

[delincuente]

Really? Huh. I thought mortals were the only ones without stuff like that.

[lord_wizard]

Implying that I'm not mortal?

[delincuente]

It just means non-wizard. People without magic.

[lord_wizard]

Ah, I see. Odd way to phrase it. Do wizards in your world have a longer than normal lifespan?

[delincuente]

Eh, not really. I guess they just thought "mortal" sounded all cool and condescending.

[lord_wizard]

As do all the other terms I know for that same thing. I imagine there are more.