oo1 [ voice ]

[mrbigshotarrow]

So I have to say thanks for the swanky new digs here. Not that I’m going to start complaining or anything, just it would have been nice to be told that I need to find a new couch to lounge on now, and Lian isn’t here with me. Seriously, you go and do something nuts like pluck a guy from his home and set him up with a room that gives you a crappy little couch? I know other people out there can hear me.

[Pauses and sighs.]

Okay, fine. Change of plans, which yeah, I’m allowed to do, there isn’t a rule against it. Anyone like stories? I love stories, I grew up with stories, and I tell them to Lian all the time. Okay, here’s a story for you. Well, they say that this should really be told 'round a campfire, but I'll keep it short and simple here.

A long time ago, Killer-of-Enemies vowed to save his people from the monster eagles that carried off children. Killer-of-Enemies tricked one monster eagle into carrying him up to the eagle nest on the cliff, where he killed the monster eagle and its family. But Killer-of-Enemies did not know how to get down from the cliff. Just then, he saw an old woman approaching. It was Old Woman Bat.

"Grandmother, help me. Take me down," Killer-of-Enemies said. Old Woman Bat saw him high in the eagle's nest. She came over to the cliff and began to climb.

"What are you doing here?" she asked, when she reached the top.

"Monster eagle carried me up here," he said. "Please take me down."

"Climb in my basket," Old Woman Bat said. Killer-of-Enemies looked at the burden basket on the old woman's back. Its carrying strap was made of spider's silk.

"That strap is too fine," he said. "It will break and I shall fall."

"Nonsense! I've carried a bighorn sheep in this basket," Old Woman Bat said. "Get in and close your eyes. If you look, we will fall."

Old Woman Bat clambered down the rock, singing a strange song. Her burden basket swayed wildly from side to side. Killer-of-Enemies thought the spider thread would surely break, so he opened his eyes to look.

As soon as Killer-of-Enemies opened his eyes. He and Old Woman Bat crashed down from the cliff. Old Woman Bat landed first and broke her legs. Killer-of-Enemies fell on top of her and was safe. Old Woman Bat's broken legs soon mended but from that day on her legs were short.

[Laughs.] Pretty good story, huh. They always have some kind of ending that's supposed to make you think.

Comments

[supes]

[Have one Superman, sounding very surprised.]

Roy?

[mrbigshotarrow]

I also go by "That Deadly Handsome Man", if you feel like being formal.

[supes]

That definitely sounds like you, but I'll stick with "Roy."

Do you not remember this place?

[mrbigshotarrow]

I was about to say what do you mean, remember this place, but then that pretty much answered that question. I've never been here before. Who're you?

[supes]

Clark Kent.

I see you've found Lian, though. If you want to catch up with your daughter first, my wife Lois and I would be happy to bring you up to speed on the story later.

[mrbigshotarrow]

Clark Kent!? Hey, why didn't you say so in the first place? 'Course I know you, we're teammates!

[supes]

[Laugh]

Sorry, had to be sure -- memories can be faulty here, and I know it's weird to have people talking to you like you know them. You doing alright?

[mrbigshotarrow]

I bet, this place is crazy enough to scare someone on a normal day. We're in a freaking castle, and I've never wanted to be a princess. [Maybe do a princess...]

Yeah, I'm okay. Got a headache like you wouldn't believe, but Lian said she's outside somewhere.

[supes]

Usually. Lots of people start living like princesses, though.

Right -- Oliver's got her, I think.

[mrbigshotarrow]

Hey, if you're in a place that'll let you, might as well give it a shot. Can I go without the tights, though? Been there, done that.

She said he's younger, what's up with that?

[supes]

People are weird about the tights here.

I'm younger, too. We're from a different timeline where things happen earlier, but we have more or less the same people and the same major events, like, say, Doomsday. I'll be twenty-nine later this month, for what it's worth. Oliver's in his mid-thirties.

[mrbigshotarrow]

I don't know anyone who likes tights.

[Aha. Man, he will never get used to this kind of thing.]

Right... okay. Ollie in his mid-thirties. That really brings me back. Lian said he's less scruffy, now.

[supes]

He's probably the antithesis of scruffy. No beard, short hair.

[mrbigshotarrow]

Weeeeird. Wait, is everyone like that? Do you have a goatee?

[supes]

Not everyone! Just Lois, Oliver, myself and two others, too, but I'm not sure that you know them.

And no, no goatee. I don't think Lois would stand for it, even if I wanted one.

[mrbigshotarrow]

What're their names?

You did always rock that clean boy thing the best. I tried, but you know what they say. The ladies love a little hair.

[supes]

Lana Lang and Tess Mercer.

[Clark figures Roy might actually know of Lana, given that she is apparently the First Lady, but...]

I'll stick with a spitcurl.

[mrbigshotarrow]

Never heard of them. [What's keeping up on current events that don't directly affect him or his daughter?]

You know, I never got to ask... is that real spit, or what?

[supes]

[He laughs]

No, it's just the name. It just rolls off the tongue easier than "that one bit of hair that likes to fall in my face constantly."

[mrbigshotarrow]

That can't be aerodynamic. Not that my hair is, but I can't really fly, so it's not like I would need it to be. Does gel not work on that, or something? Maybe a bobby pin to hold it down. You could bring back the eighties with a sweatband.

[He doesn't like situations where he feels out of control. Can't you tell?]

[supes]

[Clark smiles at his journal, a little wryly.]

I can fly through the upper atmosphere and into space. I don't think the aerodynamics of a bit of hair will bother me.

How are things at home?

[mrbigshotarrow]

Yeah, that's... that's pretty true.

[Oh. Back home?] Not bad! I finally got into the JLA. Crazy, right? Shows you were a side kick can get to, if he puts in the work. Lian is good, the Titans, last I heard, were doing pretty good. Everything is going... right.

[supes]

Good. I'm happy for you, Roy.

[mrbigshotarrow]

Hey, thanks, uh... Clark. Something good came out of all of this, right?

[supes]

Right. And a big congratulations on the JLA membership -- I know the younger crowd has problems getting us to make room.