sixth glitch

[perfectisnteasy]

[for once, in CLU's room, everything's silent.

or, well, it would be, if it weren't for the occasional restless shifting.

rustle.

rustle rustle rustle.

to the trained ear, it almost sounds like a small child who can't sit still in the corner for five minutes. because that's pretty much exactly what's going on here, minus the small part and the corner part.

meditation - no matter how good for you your User says it is - IS HARD, people. really, really hard.

rustle rustle.]


Nnnnnnnnnnnnnnnngh, this is stupid. Anyone feel like meetin' me in that gym room and showin' me how all that stuff works? I need to actually move.

Comments

[samson]

How the gym works?

[perfectisnteasy]

Yeah ...?

[doesn't everyone ask that?]

[samson]

[Did this guy not go to a public school or something ...

Wait, wait. Be more multi-cultural, Brock!] Wait. Are you not from Earth, or ... from the past or something?

[perfectisnteasy]

Ha - well, I'm from Earth, but ... I'm a program, so. Sort of a fifty-fifty split, there, I guess?

[samson]

A program. [what.]

That's not a thing.

[perfectisnteasy]

Yes it is. [DUH] My name is CLU - it stands for Codified Likeness Utility. I was created by my User, Kevin Flynn, to help him create the perfect system within the Grid. Only ... we were both brought back here.

Originally, I thought it was just the human world, that I'd bridged the data stream and ported out. Then everyone else here told us otherwise, and, well. Here I am, man.

[samson]

[This is like the longest pause imaginable. CLU might suspect that Brock just gave up and closed the book.

But after awhile --] What?

[perfectisnteasy]

I'm a program. I guess some people here'd call it an AI, but there's a lot more to me than that.

[samson]

[Oh, well, those are words he understands.]

So you're like a robot.

[perfectisnteasy]

No, I'm a program. There's nothing mechanical about me, I'm coded. There's a pretty big difference.

[samson]

Code isn't a physical thing.

[perfectisnteasy]

Then how'm I standin' here, man?

[samson]

Maybe you're a crazy person.

Dictated forever

[mal_addict]

[Luckily for Clu, Maladict is highly annoyed and restless herself. And the gym thing sounds perfect]

Sure. I can show you a thing or two.

[perfectisnteasy]

You're a pal, Maladict. I'll meet'cha there. [and he will, too, in precisely as much time as it takes him to get there from his room. no more, no less. he doesn't need to change or any of that weird User nonsense, after all]

[mal_addict]

[Maladict makes it at a more sedate pace, being Maladict and never doing anything on anyone's schedule but her own. But when she does arrive, she leans on the doorframe lazily]

Hallo, Clue.

[perfectisnteasy]

Hey. [you're late. he'll forgive that though, since you actually came to help. he's currently ... inspecting the treadmills, wondering what the point of them is]

How's it goin'?

[mal_addict]

You know, aside from the anger issues, pretty well. But ask me again in about a week when no doubt something ridiculous will happen to overhaul every one of us. My answer will probably be different.

[perfectisnteasy]

What're you angry about? Is the singing guy still ... what was it. Hitting on you?

[mal_addict]

People deciding the best idea to deal with their issues is to run away, mostly, and leave me pick up the pieces.

[perfectisnteasy]

You ... need someone to go get 'em? I can send Rinzler.

[mal_addict]

Nah, I think this is one of those 'needs to deal with it alone' things.

Plus he's trying to make everyone believe he's dead or something. Ass.

[perfectisnteasy]

... What, is he gonna come back in a couple weeks? [someone thinks he's funny, clearly]

[mal_addict]

I think that's his plan, yes. And this man is supposedly a genius. [Her tone suggests exactly what she thinks about THAT right now]

[perfectisnteasy]

I think he might have a different definition of "genius" where he's from, don't you?