twenty-sixth twist of the coil

[vampirize]

[Nikola Tesla prides himself in being a serious scientist. After all, this is the man who basically turned humanity around with his inventions and made our lives easier and more convenient than ever, paving the road for future inventions that would have been mere fantasies if he hadn't done what he had done in his life.]

[But what you might be hearing now is probably the opposite of what you would expect from a person like that. Because what you are hearing now, Paradisans, is the sound of Nikola Tesla giggling.]

[Which doesn't last very long- it's replaced by the sound of his very oddly cheerful voice.]

Oh, what a fine, fine, very happy day! [A hiccup.] I've-I've gone and gone around that stupid and completely idiotic rule that I can't process alcohol because my body metabolizes it way too quick and- anyways! You all should give me an award. Prefer-fefa-fably a Nobel Prize. I prepared a speech for it, you know. Got it all up in my noggin.

[He laughs some more, and there is the sound of clinking bottles in the background.]

You see, it's really quite simple. If you can't get the vampire to change, then change the compound of the alcohol! It's as....as...[He starts slurring his words.]....ssssssssimple as mutiplying the quantum mechanics of a Faraday Cage. Yes.

[And suddenly, there is the loud sound of glass breaking, and a thick clear liquid that smells pungently of alcohol seeps into the page. Tesla swears unintelligibly, stumbling to the ground.]

HEY! That-that was valuable science right there! Stupid hand, swinging like that...

[Good job, Tesla. You've finally successfully gotten yourself drunk. Never let a wine aficionado scientist who can't get drunk due to his nature as a vampire figure out how to get absolutely smashed. ]

Comments

[sawyourwolfjunk]

Whoa, whoa, wait. You're saying you can't get drunk off normal booze, so you went and made superbooze?

...

Want.

[vampirize]

[Tesla lets out a slight snort before he realizes the journal is open and just...kind of stumbles his way over.]

Eeeeeexactly! For some stupid rule, vampires can't process the compounds of alcohol in their systems, so I did some-some of this and that and yeah!

You want some? Come and get it. Happy to share.

[sawyourwolfjunk]

[Tesla, you have just spoken her language]

When and where, vamparino? I might even wear bells.

[vampirize]

Bells would be good! They sound nice and pretty and- that isn't the point! Um.

[More glass clinking as he scrambles around for a pen and writes the number in very shaky handwriting.]

You can come now, if you'd like.

[mal_addict]

...I leave you alone for two hours and you do something stupid with science.

[There's just some muttering over the journal as she heads back to their room. Boy she will take away your science things]

[vampirize]

[ROLLING HIS EYES SO HARD he is like the world's worst petulant child, really.]

Maaaaaaal! It's not stupid! Science is a great and wonderful thing and you just can't see the beauty of it through...through your stupid coffee rose glasses.

...

You get what I mean.

[mal_addict]

[She will take it away and you will NEVER GET IT BACK]

No, thank you. I'll keep my coffee rose glasses on, it doesn't make me act like a lunatic.

[Oh hey darling she's home. And is just looking around]

...Ye Gods, our room smells like a tavern.

[unnaturalpause]

[Giggling...

Oh you have got to be joking?

And he's not even in the castle to shove him in a cold shower while blowing a trumpet in his ear in the morning, damn.]

Speeches will have to wait. I don't think they would like a live showing of your invention.

[vampirize]

Why not?

[TOTALLY POUTING RIGHT NOW you don't understand his genius, sir >:I]

It's a marvelous and very intricate invention, and you have to be a nincompoop in order to not understand how brilliant it is.

[unnaturalpause]

[Oh no he can happily appreciate the genius behind all of this except you know, open journal and he's relatively certain Mal would yell at him if he congratulated Nikola on this.

He's settling for chastisement and jokes at their dead friends expense.]

For one you more then likely smell like Nigel after one of his nights in a pub.

[inafadingcrown]

[She can't exactly get drunk easily either, Tesla, and she's not impressed. In the most dry tone ever.]

Allow me to offer my congratulations. You have found yet another way to make yourself appear the fool in public.

[vampirize]

[OH, IF IT ISN'T HIS FAVORITE ELF. Cue (unseen) rolling of eyes.]

Says the elf who goes around blabbing things that even she doesn't understand the meaning of.

[inafadingcrown]

I'm certain I have know idea to what you are referring. [She always knows what she's talking about. Geeze.]

dictated

[hvic]

Congratulations, you've made a fool of yourself in front of everybody.

dictated forever!

[vampirize]

Congratulations, you've made yourself a laughingstock in front of me.

Good for you.

[hvic]

I'm not the one who is a drunk fool.

[jimfromit]

Having fun are we?

[vampirize]

Tons.

What, ready to pooper my party?

[jimfromit]

No no...far from it.

It's just intresting to see that I'm not the only clever clogs that likes to "slum it" every now and again.

[the_effect_she_has]

[Oh good grief. This was like Haymitch but on coffee mixed with liquor.]

So. Does this mean you're going to be even sicker in the morning?

[vampirize]

Actually-! I don't know. This is an experiment in and of itself, kiddo. So we'll see.

[the_effect_she_has]

[She could feel herself grimacing at the name 'kiddo' but ...she'd been reading the journals. She had been here before. Maybe - just maybe ...]

That will be a painful experiment.

[A pause.]

Do you ... know me?

[thebutz]

Wow, people get awards for being drunk? I had no idea!

...any chance you'd like a drinking buddy?

[vampirize]

They do! This could rev-revu-change everything in the world! Heck, I don't know, it could probably be a new fuel for cars and stuff.

You up for it? Mind you, this isn't at all normal alcohol.

[thebutz]

What kind of alcohol is it then?