paradisa | twenty-seventh twist of the coil

[Filtered to James]

...

You wouldn't happen to know where they're keeping that bird you and the others brought back, would you?

[/filter]

[Filtered to Maladict]

This has been on my mind quite a bit recently- and before I ask it, no I still haven't completely forgiven you for taking away my bunsen burner, even if I was drunk.

But anyways...have you ever tried espresso before? Given your adoration of coffee, I was curious.

[/filter]

[Filtered to Helen Magnus]

[There is actually a long pause here. He honestly doesn't know what to say, after hearing that she had come back.]

...

Never mind.

[Hey, he went over a hundred years without her, he can go a few days more without having to awkwardly talk to her about her return.]

[/filter]

[After writing in those filters, Tesla leans back in his chair with an audible creak, ready to talk to the populace of the castle once again.]

You know...hasn't it been a bit too quiet lately? I'm not talking about the expedition that just came back, I'm talking about the castle in general. Shouldn't one of those crazy castle-wide losses or world changes be happening by now? I mean, it's been too quiet. Too normal...well, if you ignore all the individual losses everyone has from time to time.

Or am I just missing something? Because it feels an awful lot like the quiet before the storm, in my opinion...

[WAY TO MAKE EVERYONE PARANOID, TESLA, A+]

Threaded | Top-Level Comments Only

That's fine because I still fail to feel even remotely bad about doing that.

[There's a pause here] That's nothing like decaf is it? [She says decaf with the same venom one would use for 'arsenic' or 'dog turd']

[YOU WOUND HIM AND SCIENCE, MAL. ESPECIALLY SCIENCE.]

What, you're not even going to begin to give it back? I mean, I could always wish up another one, but I liked that one.

[And a laugh.] Oh, quite the contrary, Mal. Extremely contrary. Lesser beings would bounce through the roof after drinking espresso. Not literally, but still, it is about as far away from decaf as one can get.

[...]

I am not telling you where it is. [Said in the flattest tone of voice possible.]

I don't know. Are you planning on creating alcohol again and being stupid?

[Oh okay, now she actually sounds interested] So it's very strong coffee, then?

[YOU ARE THE BIGGEST SCIENCE PARTY POOPER EVER why is he your friend, again. >8I]

Why not? I just want to look at it like everyone else did.

No, I'm not. The hangover from that little incident was enough, trust me...

Oh, the strongest sort of coffee you could get. [He grins, even though she can't see.] Want to go out on the town to try some?

[Because who else would he commiserate with over John getting the girl? :|]

Because, Nikola, if I show you where it is there is no guarantee I would return to it's enclosure at a later date to find it as I left it.

[True. :I]

[And he lets out an annoyed huff, like a kid who has been told he cannot have cookies before his dinner.]

Really! Honestly, James, what do you think of me? I just want to look. Did I mention anything about stealing it?

[He's really used to huffy Nikola, so his tone turns towards more annoyed then angry.]

Did I mention stealing anywhere in my last statement?

Okay, then you can have your little fire thing back.

[She actually sounds a little amused] Are you asking me out on a date?

[Wait. She should add to that before he gets huffy and she loses the chance of glorious coffee. And spending time with him, she guesses]

Sounds fun. Okay.

What do you mean?

Good! I expect it returned here as soon as possible. You know, I was this close to digging through all your stuff to find it on my own...

[He's joking, of course, but at the question, he is silent for a bit, before:]

...Sure. If that's what you want. But...anyways, it should be quite the experience.

Meet me at the lobby doors in a few?

Oh, you know how this castle tends to torture us every once in a while?

Well, it's been a while, and it hasn't done anything to make us suffer yet, which makes me think that somethings bad is going to come over the horizon if we aren't careful.

Well, you said that you probably wouldn't find it in the same place it was before if you came back to its enclosure, which in other words means "you are going to steal that bird, Nikola Tesla, and I won't like it at all".

I see. And you seem eager for something bad to happen.

[Ladies and gentlemen, I present to you the Sherlock Holmes and Nikola Tesla Show: Toddlers Edition.]

No, I said I would not find it as I left it. Can you promise me it will remain a normal, unmodified, prehistoric killer bird?

Not terribly, actually, I mean, it would be a good break from the boredom, but then again, I don't want to be turned into a bird or have to fight against space krakens or something as idiotic as that.

[The preeminent minds of their generation.]

[AND YOU REALLY PUT STOPS TO ALL HIS FUN PLANS you are the worst friend, James.]

Yes. Fine. It will remain normal, unmodified, and still the same bloodthirsty killer bird it always is.

Edited 2012-09-18 23:29 (UTC)

Then perhaps you should be careful what you ask for.

There are other ways to combat boredom than wishing unnecessary 'losses' onto the rest of us.

Just warning the public, sheesh. That teaches me to be the castle's Cassandra- no one ever listens.

And while I want to wish losses on some of you because you sort of deserve them, I'm not that mean.

Edited 2012-09-18 23:36 (UTC)

[Paragons of Victorian ideals.]

[LOOK HE PROMISED A GOOD DOZEN OR SO PEOPLE, OKAY?]

And not become the test subject of any of your latest inventions.

[~~Together with their snark they form CAPTAIN PLANET i mean~~]

...

You're really making this hard on me, you know that, right?

[ The castle's Cassandra? What? ]

Is it possible to do that?

[OBSCURE REFERENCE TO GREEK MYTHOOLOGY tesla why must you be an insufferable genius all the time.]

What, to wish losses on someone? Not at the moment, but God, I wish I could.

[~~More like Captain Snark but shh.~~]

You're not the one that nearly had their chest crushed by a prehistoric killer ostrich.

[IF YOU WANT ONE GO GET IT YOURSELF AND THEN YOU CAN TELL HIM WHAT TO DO WITH IT.]

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twenty-seventh twist of the coil

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