paradisa | 98.7 - drink with me to days gone by

[ten PM, anyone with their radios on will recognize the tune drifting over the journal, just as it has for over a year now. however, for once, Mark lets the song play all the way through to the end ... and once it's done, there's the click of a can opening]

Cheers, Paradisa. You managed to make it an entire week without even trying to build on what I threw at you last week. That takes some real commitment to stagnancy, let me JUST say. Way to set an example for our new kids, Chris, Tom, Harry, Himari, Rhode, Ukitake, Kirby, Kalinda, Adrian, Souji, and John. And hey, first we get the Mistress, now we get some schmuck calling himself the Master. What next? Anyone else wanna step up and say they're God?

Jesus fucking CHRIST. You know what? I know people don't stick around here very long half the time, but I KNOW we've still got a good chunk of people who were around this time last year. I'm not tryin' to open up old wounds, but how many of you even THINK about what happened a year ago? Or even six months ago? Do any of you even give a shit? This time last year, yours truly got a bit of a wake-up call in a lotta ways, and personally, I'm gonna remember it. So whether they're here still, or not, here's to Sam, Sister, Penny, and Kara .... and a super-special tip of the cherry Pepsi to Akihiko, for giving me a punch in the face when I needed it.

You might not still be here, but I remember you. I remember all my listeners who leave.

[he'll let the music play for a little while - two songs' worth - then pipe up idly:]

Oh, and someone's starting up the castle equivalent of a yard sale, so if you've got crap you wanna get rid of, now's probably a good time.

You know. So you can chuck your mementos and have one more reason to forget everything that's happened.

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[Curiosity got the better of her and maybe she should've interrupted sooner, but honestly -- she's pretty sure Sam would've just snapped on her. Better You than Me, Mark. Listening, she knows what Sam's going through and she understands that he gets... possessive over his experiences. They're his and what he's gone through no one is allowed to understand and he'll be damned if he'll explain them to her.

But Mark is pushing him and he's not being exactly clear on his motives. Telling him that no one can censor him, but putting limits on what other people say in response.

Exhaling, she'll get out the journal and set a filter to Sam. For a moment she almost feels like she's about to try some Robin Williams moment, but she ditches the 'It's not your fault' approach before she even opens her mouth.]

Sam, just -- let him be. He didn't listen a year ago when I told him not to use your name -- just let him make his broadcast and get his reaction from someone else.

That's all he wants. People to react, to give him something to fight against or to prove that what he's doing is important. He's just a kid that wants to have a voice that's bigger than the one he's used to.

Please, just -- let it go. [She'd rather him talk to her about it, not shout it at some kid that doesn't get it.]

[it's not that he's possessive, he just is used to people not being able to understand. All the kids with demon blood are dead, Dean tells him to bury it -- it's the way it's been his whole life, and if he tries to talk about it he almost always gets shut down.

Maybe he hit the point where he was sick of being shut down, maybe he just didn't want to care anymore, was trying to make it not matter, but burying this stuff never really gets Sam anywhere. It just sits and it rots.

Winchesters also aren't really that good at letting go. It's a thing.

He's quiet for a long time as he tries to get a handle on himself again, and when he finally does talk he's barely reigning himself in.]

I know. I know that, but ... he's being a dick.

[it's the most petulant response in the world, but it's got all those feelings behind it that it's not just about that.]

Yes. He is, but he's also seventeen. You're right, he hasn't been through much and he's going through the motions just the same as most of us. He was used to whatever horrible mess his high school was going through and now he's got talking ponies and violent, sometimes graphic, deaths.

[She's quiet for a moment.]

Let me come by... or come here, at least.

You're not this guy. [she makes a soft amused sound] You're angry, yes, but you're yelling at the wrong person.

[he was probably going to wind up at the Lux drinking anyway, so ... he might as well actually have someone to talk to while he does. It takes him a while to sort through that being an option, because he doesn't like other people seeing him like this, but if he doesn't get out of the room, he's probably going to explode]

Yeah. Yeah -- are you at the bar?

I'm at home, in the city. [She does have other employees... sometimes they work there.]

I can come there -- if you'd rather. [She thinks the air and the walk would be good for him, though.]

[Walking is probably a good idea, actually.]

No, I'll come there. I'll be there in ten.

I'll leave the back door unlocked.

98.7 - drink with me to days gone by

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sam ]

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