paradisa | 1/020: THIS ISN'T SANITARY. THIS ISN'T SANITARY. THIS ISN'T SANITARY.

HENSHAW: [Forward to December 5th]

Don't come outside.
Don't do it mate.
J-just stay in your house. And... stay there. Forever possibly.
Unless you're already outside. Th-then you probably know and this won't really help.

MISTRESS:[Back dated to yesterday.]

I um… hello! It’s me again! Just me… I um.
I have your cake! Would you like me to deliver it to you?
I even put it in a box-- it’s rather impressive. One of the most impressive cakes I’ve ever made.

GLaDOS:

...Loveee?

[He sounds a little whiny. Pretend he also didn't come home last night.]

[ACTION]

[There is a rather tall bloke hiding underneath a table somewhere in the lobby, trying his best to keep out of sight. It would have honestly worked, if he weren't terribly tall and lanky, awkward limbs trying their best to keep from spilling out from under the small table. He is curled up, journal open.

Too bad he doesn't notice the nutcracker sitting on top of the table he was hiding under.]

Sa-say, there wouldn't happen to be anyone immune to this... this... thing, would there?
Anyone? I kind of need help... and by kind of I mean really need help. In fact... I think I'm stuck.

[He's not about to be caught in the crossfires. Feel free to pass him by and smooch him up. Or ask him what he's doing! Or help him out from under the table.]

[KISSING OPEN. Anyone! Feel free to kiss him whether you know him or not. Come on, everyone knows men hiding under tables deserve a little bit of smooching!]

Threaded | Top-Level Comments Only

[ ... ]

... What are you doing?

[ She leans over the table to try and work out what on earth he's doing. ]

[Oh! There's a familiar voice...
Poking his head out to look up to her, he spoke in a very VERY very soft voice.]

Hiding, love.

...

Y-you should too! It's not a good idea to be... um, out here... at a time like this.

Hiding from what? [ She has a quick look around but... nothing? ]

There's nobody out here, Wheatley!

[He shakes his head, a little frantic.]

Nononono... see, see I'm sure tat's what they want you to think. Whoever they even are. Ghosts, maybe. Possibly.

I think... they're uh, invisible, love.
Going about, smashing people's faces together.

That sounds painful!

Why would the ghosts do that?!

Edited (PRESSED A BIT SWIFT LIKE) 2012-12-04 12:47 (UTC)

I'm not sure... actually.
Not... not too sure... but they've been doing that to everyone!
You're a lucky one if you haven't heard about it...

You should hide too! This spot seems safe... There's a bit of space here if you want some--

[He turns, and hits his head on the top of the table.]

Gnngh! Or... or not. Um. Okay... uh! T-tell you what! You can have this spot... and I can look for another!

[Taking care of the younglings!]

[ Oh. Ow. She winces when he bangs his head. ]

Are you sure? I mean, I don't really know what's going on...

Maybe you should stay there for a minute, before you bang your head again!

[He nods a bit and rubs his head.]

Ow... ow... right.

[Though he looks at her, scratching his head... his cheeks may have flushed ever so slightly. Cue the stutters... he may have gone up a whole notch in the awkward department. That nutcracker is looooooming.]

Oh um... um... well, It's supposedly something that happens every year apparently. St-still don't know too much about it. Just a bit. Un... unfortunately... all... all I can really give you on the... the uh... the si... situation. On... ma-matters... I... um.

[He's making no senseeee....]

S-sorry... I...

[He runs his hands over his face.]

I... can't seem to get my words straight.

[Chell happens to be wandering past that table when Wheatley's frantic plea for help reaches her ear. She glances down at him with a raised eyebrow. And then notices the nutcracker.

She has no idea what the sudden strange urge is that she feels, but before she really knows what's happening, she's moving the table and kissing Wheatley right on the lips.

Afterword, she backs up, shaking her head and looking entirely and completely confused. What the heck had that been all about?]

[OOC: HEY WHEATS HAVE A KISS FROM A MUTE LUNATIC!]

[Jade just happens to be passing by when he sees the odd sight and pokes his head under the table to see the man from way back when at the time of the masq.]

This is quite an odd predicament to get yourself into.

[Oh. Wheatley looked surprised to see Jade; but he didn't comment on it, instead retreating even further under the table, muttering in a rather annoyed tone.]

A better predicament than going off and-and engaging in human affections with strangers...

[The scientist hadn’t even noticed she was there until she was moving the table, bouncing up to his feet the moment he felt the relief of freedom. Yes! He was just about to thank her, but before he could even get the words out, she was already pressing her lips against his. Cue a confused sound and a slight choke in surprise. A kiss? From her? It was a little different than getting kissed by a stranger—considering he actually knew who she was!

Has he ever been that flustered before? His pale complexion flushed in color, and he couldn’t even muster the concentration to form a sentence. He’s a dork, okay. ]

Oh-oh... I uh, ohhhh.... I...

[What are words?]

D-did... was... did I--

[He suddenly collapsed, fainting and sprawling across the floor.]

[OOC: YES. PERFECT.]

... Are you sure you're feeling okay? [ She sees those cheeks and kneels down next to him to place her hand on his forehead. ]

[ but what actually happens is her lips softly pressing against his forehead. ]

...! O-Oh! Sorry!

Huh?

[His cheeks flare up even more.]

Ah! There-- there it is again!
That thing! Did it push you???

[He's totally playing detective right about now.]

W-What thing?! I just... It just felt like...

I should... [ :| Her cheeks are a bit flared up too... Even she knows that randomly kissing someone is a BIT odd. ]

Um... ok-okay.
We just need to... um... calm down.

[Just a bit. Luckily enough, she has an IMMATURE BUDDY HERE who handles everything like a kid. He knows this is weird but he's experienced worse-- if only Trucy knew what HER FATHER did to him a few hours ago. He's just not going to talk about that.]

You should probably stay in your room, love. Till this is all sorted out and done with. Wouldn't want you to show affections to anyone creepy. Or anyone creepy to show affections to... you. We all know there are uh, wayyy too many ...uh, creepy people in this castle.

Mhmm... You're right! Is this what you meant by "smashing faces" together...?

... Daddy'd probably be really mad, wouldn't he?

Yes! Exactly what I meant, actually! Some more literally...'smashing' however.

[He manages to drag himself out from under the table.]

Probably! Especially if anything happened to you!
He has the same problem too, but he probably is more worried about you. Which makes sense! Human relations and all.

[When he gets out, he crouches near her, as if offering her a piggyback ride.]

I suppose that makes keeping you safe my responsibility for the time being.

I would have thought engaging in human affections was optional.

Huh?

[He isn't sure what he means, though when he tries to get out from under the table, he is still properly stuck. For now, Wheatley will not be hostile, if only because he's not in the position to be.

That's the reason, right?]

What do you...what do you mean by that?

You said being under the table was better than engaging in human affections. To my understanding, it's entirely optional. You aren't required to have affection for anyone.

Eh-Ehe... I uh... well you see...

...

You haven't been out much, have you?

Regularly.

Haven't been out much regularly.

Which is just what I just said.

Page 1 of 19

1/020: THIS ISN'T SANITARY. THIS ISN'T SANITARY. THIS ISN'T SANITARY.

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

Here to make Wheetles' life worse

ITSBEENSOLONG

no subject

1/2

no subject

no subject

no subject

YOUR ILLEGITIMATE UNCLE IS TOTALLY GOING TO LOOK OUT FOR YOU.

WELL HE BETTER.

HE'LL BE THE BEST UNCLE EVER. <3

SO LONG ;A;

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject