Chapter One

[thebestseller]

So is it sad that my first thought upon arriving in a castle is that, hey, I'm in one and my name IS Castle? Yeah, I thought so. Yo, we heard you like castles, so here's a Castle inside your castle. Of course, I'm not sure if anybody is actually seeing this, I'm just copying other people whom I've seen writing in their journals as they walk along. Monkey see, monkey do.

Comments

[Dictated]

[deductiongeek]

[...That was a really terrible joke. Is this guy serious?]

We can all see this. The journals are how most people communicate here.

[Dictated]

[thebestseller]

And it talks, too! This is like a low-tech phone.

dictated;

[panicswitched]

So if somebody walked off a cliff while writing in their journals, you'd do it, too?

dictated;

[thebestseller]

I have a bit more sense than that.

[theabjectauthor]

Several people are, in fact, seeing it, Mr. Castle - and I, Lemony Snicket, am one of them. ... Hello.

[thebestseller]

Indeed, this is a wonderful magic journal. I'd like to say "now I've seen everything" but that is just asking for trouble.

Written

[jimfromit]

Do you make a habit of writing down every thought that enters your head?

[thebestseller]

When the mood strikes me, certainly.

[whistles_the_blues]

Welcome to the castle... Castle.

[thebestseller]

Appreciate it. ... That might get confusing pretty quickly.

[majestic_leader]

Throw in a few members of Fireteam Castle and we'd be all set.

[Laughing, because DeMarco can appreciate a good joke.]

[thebestseller]

I'm not sure what Fireteam Castle is, but it sounds pretty cool.

dictated

[kungfuwitch]

A Castle in a castle, huh? Yeah that's a new one on me.

[thebestseller]

I do have a first name, but yes, everyone calls me Castle, and I ended up in an actual one. Very amusing.

[truestsciences]

that is the wworst fuckin joke ivve heard in a long wwhile
congratulations

[thebestseller]

Thank you, thank you.

[luxe_can_kill]

A newcomer. Welcome. My name is Mitsuru Kirijo. If you need to know anything about the castle, perhaps I could be of assistance. [She didn't care for the joke or his last name, she's got no sense of humor]

[thebestseller]

Thanks much. I suppose for starters, I'd ask how I got here, since I don't remember being anywhere near any castles, seeing as how I live in New York City and all.

[spongetastic]

I hope we won't get the two of you confused.

[thebestseller]

Shouldn't be too hard, since I'm a human being, after all.

[kryptonian]

[Have a chipper young lady talking back at you!]

I guess we'll have to stop saying "the Castle," in case you think we're talking about you.

[thebestseller]

Might not be a bad idea- even though I don't call myself "the Castle". Hey, that's a snappy title. The Castle has arrived.

[silentrunning]

[Oh man. Your journal's writing to you... In Caer Paradisa journal write in you and all of that crap...But there it is. A scrawl of letters on your page.]

I see you.

[thebestseller]

Good. Hello there.

[Dictated]

[clockworkchild]

...You're named after a castle?

[Dictated]

[thebestseller]

Not exactly, but I did change my last name to Castle.