24 - Dictated - Rogue

[radiantwingedone]

[ Duke is bored - and moderately pleased that he hadn't eaten any of the mysterious food, from checking the journal. Avoiding people on holidays - or maybe just avoiding the new things about the holidays - seems to be a good plan here. ]

A question born of curiosity; what do you all consider an act of betrayal?

[ His voice is carefully neutral - well, perhaps a bit flat. This is perhaps a bit tricky of a subject to get a long conversation on from him. ]

Suppose the follow up question would be 'what is an appropriate reaction to being betrayed'?

[ He'll do his best not to be biased at any responses. ]

Comments

[ dictated ]

[radiantwingedone]

.... [ He still isn't comfortable with that. ]

... Likely. Mostly lack of projects.

Re: [ dictated ]

[peacockherald]

And you could think of nothing more cheerful to ask of them betrayal?

[radiantwingedone]

It is a little bit of a constant to my problems.

[ Dryly. He avoids friends because he was betrayed, he avoids people for the same reason. He fails socially - wait, no, he was never really interested in being social. ]

[peacockherald]

Betrayal is? Why so?

[radiantwingedone]

Other than a deep personality flaw, or perhaps a problem with family situation in young years, can another reason for all the problems I display be found?

[ He feels like he should slip a filter here soon. It depends on the reply. ]

[peacockherald]

I suppose it depends. It might not be betrayal at all, it could be that situations in your childhood produced distrust. Certainly as a child, I suffered things that made me... antisocial, to say the least.

[radiantwingedone]

... To the particular intensities?

[ Can he find the start of the words and scribble a filter there? He's starting to think that openly talking that he has a problem with betrayal might prevent answers... ]

[peacockherald]

Intensities? How do you mean? Like, between friendship and lover?

/scribbled in filter to Vanyel

[radiantwingedone]

[ What? No.

And he doesn't want any of those either- ]

To the particular strength I have aversions to contact, to friends, speaking properly.

Re: /scribbled in filter to Vanyel

[peacockherald]

Hmm, I am not much of a mind healer, so it is not my speciality, but I know a bit of it. I've dealt with people who are hurt like that, on my circuits, often in poorer areas of my country, or along the border of the theological state of Karsite.

But betrayal might not be the cause. It could easily stem, I think from experiences in your childhood such as how your parents treated you, if you had many friends as a child, that sort of thing.

[radiantwingedone]

...

[ This is a moderately good point. ]

And if quiet and perhaps overly bookish until such an event?

[peacockherald]

Then yes, it might be especially traumatic. It... was for me, when I reached my breaking point.

[radiantwingedone]

[ This silence is Duke fighting that particularly black mood that dark thoughts can bring up.

There's a odd sort of exhale, the kind that might come with the weak laughter of someone... who was prone to laughing. ]

Suppose broken is a descriptor that suits me well enough.

[peacockherald]

That is not what I meant, Duke. It is merely the point at which we can no longer stand the abuse.

Mine is when my sword master broke my arm, and when the sword master accused me of cheating, my father took his side, despite the clear evidence of my wounds.

[radiantwingedone]

And recovering? Moving on? That is what prevents being referred to as broken, is it not? Being able to function, yet?

[ He's not going to touch the other words, not yet. His mood is souring and talking about it would definitely turn it worse.

A bit of running and hiding, just from himself.. ]

[peacockherald]

Yes, that is true, though... I think I am still broken, a little bit.

I will never move on from what happened next. I can't. But I can... accept it as part of myself and adjust to living with that.

[radiantwingedone]

.... Adjust? How does one...adjust, to-

[ He really doesn't want to talk about it, really. His mood is bad enough right now and so this sound is that of the journal getting shoved away. Thumping and settling on the ground.

Clearly he adjusted badly. He shouldn't have asked this of the journal. Or he should have filtered it away from people who would try to ask questions of him because of it. ]

[peacockherald]

Duke... Do you want me to come where you are? It is easier to speak of such things in person, I think, and... you should speak of them.

[radiantwingedone]

[ Duke's reply is muffled, and negative, probably by a pillow or his arms and knees, but there's heavy footsteps, and something scaled picks up the journal, then walks over..

And presses it to the roomplate and number. Seems a critter Duke's living with thinks he ought to talk too, and that his room is on the third floor of the satis tower. ]

[ action ]

[peacockherald]

_{[He notes the number and rises, leaving his own and making his way there, though it takes him a few moments. He knocks on the door, waiting.]}

[ action ]

[radiantwingedone]

[ There's a muffled "go 'way", but the door opens carefully... under the claws of a large creature. Its one of those pokemon, and it holds the journal.

It nods at Vanyel and starts its way back into the cave-like room, completely ignoring the plain wooden door at one side for a slight slope down at the back. A cat may try to claim attention, and there's a blue bird with white, fluffy wings preening Duke's hair, where he's curled up partially on that down slope. ]

Ought to adopt someone else, Aina.

[ The reptile pokemon just rumbles and moves past him. Nope, he's stuck with her. ]

Re: [ action ]

[peacockherald]

<sub>[Vanyel is bemused by this, but not scared. Clearly the Pokemon cared for Duke. He shut the door behind him, but did not lock it, worried such an action would scare Duke. He set his own journal aside and followed the reptile down the slope and to Duke.

He took a set up the slope a bit, but still close, not caring if his tunic or pants got dirtied.]</sub>

Well, I have to say, I have not yet seen a room shaped like this. Do caves bring you comfort?

[radiantwingedone]

.... The oldest spring in the world was shaped like this. I do not know if the rock or flowers match but.... yes.

[ It was quiet, if one ignored the stirrings of lava from far in the back and far down - the place that currently has his bed, just not quite that deep - and Duke was fairly sure he was the first human to have been there for centuries.

And thanks, Vanyel, for not just jumping on the topic from before immediately. Distracting him tends to be a valid tactic. ]

[peacockherald]

The oldest spring in the world? It must have been a powerful place, then.

_{[He understood and respected the power of nature. Having lived among the Tayledras like he did, it had been instilled in him, especially when working with nodes.]}

[radiantwingedone]

[ Duke slowly nods, staring blankly ahead. ]

Was stable, as well. Probably because the continent was a cliff-face and little else. [ He doesn't actually mean a water-spring. ]

No humans to muck it up...