Number 2. [ Dictated ]

[patching_up]

[When 5 speaks into his journal it is with a cracked and haggard tone, quieter than it ought to be. He did not expect to wake up this morning in perfect condition, save the irreparable missing eye of course-- though while that was simply a shock, the realization that the decades of memories he'd been reminiscing on were all a lie definitely stung quite a bit more. His fabricated life and history, after all, were much nicer and less traumatic than the reality he has now been brought back to.]

None of that was real. It was all in my head...

[There is a dry, sobbing sound.]

No... w-why...? I had years and years o-of... of happy memories, where n-no one died and it... the castle... it did this to me? Why?!

It...

It must really hate me. Whatever I did wrong, ah, I'm sorry... I'm sorry! Please, n-no more of this...

Comments

[waterproofed]

Five... It's not your fault. Don't even think that.

[patching_up]

I-it feels like I'm being... punished, for something. I thought, I-I thought--

[The poor thing pretty much breaks down crying, or as close as he can get to crying without actually being able to shed tears.]

[waterproofed]

No! It has nothing to do with you! The castle just likes being a jerk sometimes.

[patching_up]

That's it...? That's the only reason it would do that?

[kid_apocalypse]

The castle doesn't hate you. It...did that to everyone. Turned us into something that we're not.

I...knew it did stuff like this, but...this is my first time experiencing it, too.

[Though in Evan's case, all his transformation into the ancient version of himself did was remind him of who he'd been cloned from.]

[patching_up]

I know it wasn't just me. But it felt like, w-with what it made me think, that... it's angry at me. It wanted to hurt me as much as it could. And... it did.

[kid_apocalypse]

It did to me, too. Turned me into someone...absolutely evil, made me feel like I don't have a choice.

[whichwayyoulean]

Welcome the living in Paradisa.

And that? Was pretty tame compared to what it usually does.

[patching_up]

How could that be tame? It... I don't know what to think now.

[whichwayyoulean]

Normally, it's got us running around for our lives. Or burying deep into a psyches and seeing what it can dig out.

[cyan_maid]

[Oh no...poor Five! Jane knows how you feel.]

Oh, Five, please don't cry. The important thing is that we're all right now.

[She still sounds like an old lady, though. What's up with that?]

[patching_up]

... I felt more all right before than I do now.

[cyan_maid]

I know. It hurts a lot, right?

Something like this happened before! Everyone in the castle thought they were one big happy family. I thought I'd go home to see my Dad at the end of it. But it was a lie. The castle likes to make lies.

[silentrunning]

[Chell's reading her journal...]

I hate this place.

[She'd offer you a hug if she knew where you were.]

[patching_up]

I was happy here, a-at first. I thought it was nice, and better than what I had.

... that was wrong, though... it's not nice at all. H-how could I ever have thought...?!

[silentrunning]

[She understands...]

It sounds like you need a friend. Where are you? I'll come sit with you.

Filtered to the freaking out guy

[originalcopy]

Hey man... don't tear yourself up. The Castle is a grade A asshole.

[Church is starting to think maybe the fact he didn't have any false memories is a good thing. He's not sure he'd handle it either.]

[ Filtered ]

[patching_up]

Why is it like that? It's not fair, I... don't understand why it would do this t-to me! I must have done something wrong...

Filtered to end of conversation

[originalcopy]

You didn't do anything wrong. It's just the fucked up way the castle works.

It screwed with all of us.

I wish I knew why, or that there was an easy answer. But I don't and there isn't.

[encryptedlock]

[York's voice is thoughtful - this person must be new here.]

First of all, you gotta remember it happened to all of us. It wasn't just in your head. I had memories of all those years I'll never have, too, so you're not the only one.

If you want to talk about it, that's okay. And if you don't--just try to remember you're not alone, okay?

[patching_up]

It gave me the one thing that I wanted the most, and I d-didn't-- I don't want that to be fake! It's too awful... why? Why did things turn out this way?

[Caught up in his own misery, 5 hasn't realized that maybe he's being a little selfish. Thinking about how he alone had been deceived is already more than he can handle, but he shouldn't be forgetting about everybody else... and somehow, knowing that he isn't the only one makes it hurt a little less.]

I'm sorry. You're being so kind. I've never had to deal with this before...

[encryptedlock]

Nah, it's all right. This place can be pretty rough if you're not used to it.

[It had given him everything he wanted and then taken it away, too. Maybe not with this change - he wasn't sure he'd want to be senile again, that part wasn't too fun - but from time to time he'd had nearly everything here only to be left with nothing.]

What I meant is, it's not like you did anything to make it mad. In fact, it probably just did it to make you mad.

[majestic_leader]

Aw, buddy. It's not your fault; this castle is just one of the biggest dicks you'll ever meet.

[patching_up]

Why d-does it do this? What could it possibly gain...?

[majestic_leader]

I don't know if anyone has the answer to that question.