paradisa | sixty-fourth labyrinth

[Friends, away from Mildmay and Thamuris]

My brother arrived a few days ago. I notice a few of you have spoken to him already, in which case you can ignore the alias he gave you. His name is in fact Mildmay.

I would consider it a kindness if you treated him as a friend and didn't harass him too much? I feel as though the latter has to be stressed, knowing some of you. [Trolling his brother is HIS JOB, thank you very much] He's not...very comfortable with magic and I think there are many aspects of the castle he'll not deal with easily.

Do what you can to give him assistance and keep an eye out for him. I will not allow him to come to harm while I'm around [The binding by forms seemed to demand he assure that. The one downside to being removed from Mirador politics is that it did not provide the same level of protection here.] I imagine the resemblance will be easy enough to spot, but he also has a scar and walks with a cane.

And before you ask, we are half brothers, yes.

[And maybe it's a little petty but...well, Thamuris didn't want to be one of his secrets, so...]

Hm. Since I'm on the subject, I may have forgot to mention that someone else from my world arrived a few months ago. His name is Thamuris and he is a wizard from the country I was born in.

[That statement is happily free of baggage here, so it's easily not to mention how they really met]

I'd like the same consideration to apply to him.

[Mildmay]

I need you to come over.

[Room 626]

[After sending those messages heads back out to the living room with a slight sigh to find Ashura. He seems sense and obviously bracing himself for something.]

There's something you need to know...

((ooc: If you're wondering if they rate as a friend that's mostly the people on his CR chart, but feel free to ask if you're not sure))

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[uhhhhhh oh. he's got a bad feeling about this. and after a moment's thought, he remembers. the two wizards he'd told him about ages ago....and....]

Shit. That blood bond thing. I almost forgot. .... Maybe... Maybe that's his loss.

Edited 2013-03-15 22:17 (UTC)

It's not a blood bond [Lets just avoid any more comparisons to blood wizardry, thank you very much...]...and no such luck. I felt it the second he arrived. Besides, it wouldn't make much of a loss, considering I'm sure he'd rather be long rid of it.

Well, fuck. ... Do you know if he's from after the ... from after you went back to get him out of there?

Yes. It was almost the first thing I asked. He and I seem to have arrived from the same approximate time period. Minus a month or so, in his case. That...particular event...was two years ago for us both.

[It's more...current events...by Mildmay's standards in any case, that have him concerned]

[Mark scrubs a hand over his face, thinking. shit shit shit, this is a potential mess. he doesn't usually get talked to about the heavy things like this, no matter how much he tries to convince people to. but it's the truth, and real, and it matters, so ... he's got to be able to say something, even if it's just some simple acknowledgement that Felix is being genuinely heard. over the last couple of years, he's seen how much it takes for his friend to trust, especially with things like this. he doesn't want to waste that trust]

Can you undo it? Or ... I mean ... do you want to?

I don't...

[That was a hell of a question. Because it's never occurred to him to consider it and when he does it's terrifying. Even though he doesn't want to have that power over his brother anymore, he's had it so long it's become a lifeline. A habit. Before coming here he'd been stripped to almost nothing. A few pairs of clothes, some books, a pack mule, and...his brother. And without the bond, would be even have that much?]

Even if I wanted to, the bond is meant to be permanent. There is no way I know of. What does it even matter? I dragged him from one exile into another and he's going to hate me...

[He closes his mouth before that note of panic turns into a full-blown bout of hysteria, but he's probably said too much already]

[wow. he's almost never heard Felix like this, and it's as good an indication as any of how important his brother is to him, and how much this is wigging him out. Mark's eyes widen, even as he tries to put on his best sympathetic, calm tone, the one he unwittingly borrows from Mrs. Emerson, and Eleven]

Hey..... Just.... it's okay, Felix. Take a breath. M'not going anywhere, and neither is Mildmay.

Edited (autocorrect no stop) 2013-03-20 17:19 (UTC)

At least you have some choice in the matter.

[On his side of the journal, Felix presses fingers against his eyes and tries to reign in his panic and the temper that always seemed to follow it close by.]

[Mark can feel the start of that well-known Felix backlash, already, and just sits, quietly. he doesn't want to make things worse, he wants to help make them better. and right now, it looks like the best way he can do that is be patient. he wants to tell Felix that's not what he meant, that he wasn't implying Mildmay wasn't going anywhere because of the bond.

instead, he'll just doodle on the page to let Felix know he hasn't quit their conversation - music notes, blocky patterns that work their way around the edges of the page, a little robot face]

[Felix's ability to run people away from conversations relied rather heavily on them taking the bait he laid out for them. It was, in effect, rather difficult to have a fight when the other party simply refused to have it. It's a small wonder Mark has figured this out where so many other people have not, and it does the trick.

A few long moments he speaks up again with a soft sigh]

I don't think I'm ready for this conversation right now.

[part of him wants to go find Felix, shake him, and say "well be ready, asshole, you started it". but that's the kind of open-mouth-eject-brain talking that cost Malcolm his life. so he breathes and pushes it back a little, smooths the rough edges off it, and injects a little humor. that seems to have worked well in the past]

Mmkay. ... What conversation do you wanna have? How 'bout "gee, hey, look, there's weather out!"

[That comment flies a little wide of the mark in terms of keeping him calm, but in terms of baiting him back into the conversation it works admirably.]

You don't understand. The obligation d‘âme isn't the only way I've wronged him. If you haven't noticed, I am not a nice person. I've done and said things...

[He let's out a drawn out sigh of frustration]

He should hate me. That he doesn't seem to is beyond me, given my abysmal failure at being a brother or even a friend.

[there's another long pause as he thinks, then he speaks up quietly] You have, yeah, but I don't hate you either. And he's your family. Which means it's probably even harder for him to hate you than it is for ME to.

We've all fucked up and done stuff we ain't proud of, Felix. And if we're not complete jackasses, it makes it easier for us to not pile shit on other people for the same thing. After two years, I think it's pretty safe for me to conclude you ain't a complete jackass.

I have tried. I won't deny that. I'm just not sure it's enough. And when I go back, none of it will matter.

And none of what I've done in the last couple of years here will matter when I'm gone, either. Doesn't mean I'm gonna stop.

[he sighs] This is huge, I know. It's a big "oh shit" moment. And you gotta lot to figure out. I'm not gonna tell you what to do, or anything, because that'd be fucking dumb, but ...

Well.

You know where I am if you need t' talk.

I do. And perhaps I will. I just...need to make sure he's sorted first.

....thank you.

[how many times does he have to tell you that this is what friends are for? at least once more, apparently]

Any time, man. Any time.

sixty-fourth labyrinth

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