rose: entertain marine life

[fluthlu]

[Dictated, in a tense, immensely irritated voice: ]

If anyone has use for a veritable arsenal of marine life -

[There's a faint sloshing noise, and anyone on the fourth floor will see a door open up to let out a stream of ocean water, seaweed, and one grumpy sea turtle. A very wet young girl in a bathrobe follows.]

- I believe I can be of service.

Comments

[flailingfelt]

[there's a frog in the hallway. he just sort of stands there and lets the water swill around his webbed feet, because hey. frog.

he looks up at her, matter-of-factly:] At least you aren't being shellfish about it.

[fluthlu]

[She looks over at him, her face a bit pinched with agitation, and applauds briskly.]

Forgive me for not having any percussion on hand, or I would have provided a beautiful rimshot.

[flailingfelt]

Heh, thanks. ... Amphibian humor. [he smiles] ... What happened?

[fluthlu]

I attempted to take a bath.

[flailingfelt]

Wow. [he looks pretty nonplussed about that, and blinks] That's ... Gonzo-level weird, right there. Yep.

[fluthlu]

[... Does she want to know...]

I'll blindly agree with that and hope that it doesn't mean anything obscene.

[flailingfelt]

Oh, it doesn't! Gonzo's a friend of mine, he's just ... pretty weird, sometimes.

[fluthlu]

Ah.

[A nod of calm agreement.]

Is he also... a frog?

[flailingfelt]

No, he's just a weirdo. ... A blue one.

[fluthlu]

A blue weirdo. Fascinating.

[She's trying to discern if "weirdo" is actually some sort of species, or if she should inquire further.]

[flailingfelt]

Yeah, nobody really knows where he's from. He just kind of ... showed up. [Kermit shrugs. his canon point does not yet include Muppets From Space, you see]

[fluthlu]

Well, it certainly sounds like the basis for an entertaining backstory.

[flailingfelt]

Oh, I'm sure it is. We just don't usually have the time for backstory, what with it being a variety show and all.

[oh, fourth-wall-aware characters.]

[fluthlu]

... Excuse me?

[She isn't sure she quite got the meaning of that.]

[flailingfelt]

Uh, never mind. [ahem] My name's Kermit. How're you? Other than, you know. The sudden turtle.

[fluthlu]

I'm simply delightful.

[She unwraps a piece of seaweed from her wrist and reaches out for a handshake.]

Rose.

[flailingfelt]

Nice to meet you, Rose. Do you need help cleaning everything up? I don't mind getting wet.

[frog, in case you missed the memo]

[fluthlu]

I suppose an extra pair of hands wouldn't be a nuisance.

[What has her life come to]

action

[checklist]

[ Have a purple pony wearing a big crown thingy just.... raising a hoof as the water pools around her hooves. ]

What in Celestia is-

Is that a tortoise? [ Wait, no- ] -Turtle?

[fluthlu]

[Rose only stares for about three seconds before sighing and removing a small crab from her hair.]

Yes. A sea turtle, if I'm not mistaken.

[checklist]

...Should I even ask why you had a sea turtle in your room?

[fluthlu]

They came out of my bathtub.

[Totally adequate explanation.]

Several sea turtles, to be precise, accompanied by quite a few less-than-personable hermit crabs.

[checklist]

Yes, well, they ARE hermit crabs, after all.

[fluthlu]

... A shrewd observation.

[checklist]

Thank you. [ She assumes this girl means it sincerely. She does mean it sincerely right? ]

[fluthlu]

[... Of course.]

I'm afraid the castle saw fit to turn my bath into something akin to a tsunami.

1/2 action!

[lohacse]

[lohacse]

[ you're embarrassing him ]

Please don't say you ran out of shit to wish for so you went with bringing the Pacific in here. [ s m o o t h ]

[fluthlu]

Damn, you're onto me. I was attempting to go through with a preposterously lavish home makeover, and things got out of hand.

[She pulls the bathrobe as tightly closed as she can make it before stepping out into the hallway, removing some seaweed from her hair as she does so.]

[lohacse]

So are you cleaning it up or is it like your asshole gift to us through passive aggressive shenanigans.

[fluthlu]

I think I'll leave it. The fourth floor was looking a bit parched, to be honest.

[bubbleglub]

W)(at is it? 38O
If its a marine animal you s)(ould take it back to t)(e S-EA!
And you s)(ould be a lot nicer in your tuna voice!
T)(ey can )(ear you and your rude EMOC-EANS!

[fluthlu]

My deepest apologies.
Forgive me for overreacting when several hundred gallons of sea water and ocean life spawned out of my bathtub faucet.

[A pause as she wrings water out of her hair.]

I'm not sure where the nearest sea is either, I'm afraid.
Several weeks away at the least, I'd guess.

[bubbleglub]

I'll take w)(atever it is off your )(ands for you!

[fluthlu]

If you have any idea as to how to remove it, then be my welcome guest, Peixes.

dictated;

[waterbends]

I'll trade you. I have a heard of goats in my room.

[fluthlu]

Gladly. I'm fairly certain that goats would have a difficult time getting themselves lodged in my hair.

[waterbends]

I made the mistake of asking for something warm to wear. I think the goats are going to eat all of my clothes instead.

[fluthlu]

[A polite chuckle.]

I'm beginning to wonder if it's getting jaded of us demanding things from it.

[waterbends]

I wish it'd just stop giving us things, if that's the case. This is just a little ridiculous.

[fluthlu]

At the very least. I could certainly do with a nice order of restraint, rather than a veritable tsunami when I so much as attempt to take a bath.

[bedninja]

[All of a sudden, a very strangely dry kidlet is there! Don't mind him while he crouches in front of the sea turtle.]

This does not seem the sort of thing that one would typically wish to be of service for.

[fluthlu]

Nonsense, I'm sure there are flourishing career opportunities in sealife removal.

[Said in an amused, sarcastic voice.]

[bedninja]

[Amusement he knows; sarcasm he is less adept at catching, and Pharos looks up at her, trying to determine if that actually was sarcasm, or if he misheard her.]

Well, likely there would not be here... but perhaps if there were an ocean nearby that regularly produced sea creatures, there would be.

[fluthlu]

[For a short moment she thinks about explaining that she hadn't exactly meant it, but it just seems like a tedious option.]

I'm afraid I can't attest to the verity of that suggestion, having never seen an ocean here.