Seventeenth Time - I'm an old maid already?!?! Somebody bang me NOW!! [dictated]

[losemycherry]

[Yamada doesn't seem to be herself. Her dictation comes a bit slower now, and there are huge pauses at seemingly random points in the entry.]

Just what is it with youngsters these days? I would like to know. They don't seem to have any respect - and it's hard to even understand what they're about sometimes. Life used to be so much simpler before all these newfangled gadgets and supernatural powers got in the way. Lots of people have learned how to adapt, I guess. Can't say I'm one of 'em.

Holly Peaks Day 2

[hollypeaks]

[The sunshine of yesterday has given way to dark, grey clouds, and it’s sort of hard to tell if that’s rain or snow coming down, but since there’s no blanket of white, we’ll assume it’s slush. It makes arthritic bones ache all the same. There’s no way you’ll be getting outside today, which is a shame. Hope you enjoyed the good weather while it lasted.

Now, what could dear old Holly Peaks have in store for you this Saturday?]

[Craft Room/Cafeteria/Nurse's Station/Senior Prom]

xxxvii λ the great escape

[assemblatore]

( Filtered to all trustworthy senior citizens. (If your character if relatively trustworthy aka not going to tell the nurses, go for it.) )

Skit 9: All grown up

[protosshaze]

I have witnessed so much in my time here. I'm doing what I can to keep my promise, but I still wish I could do more for all my friends. What would they enjoy? I realize that not everyone likes flowers....

105.9 - too old to die young now

[hard_talker]

[so, it's past curfew. it's ... well, to be precise, it's 9:55 PM. Mark shuffles down the hall, a tape deck tucked under one arm. it took him a lot of bartering, a lot of mail ordering, and a lot of quiet splicing with a stereo he's not supposed to have, but honestly ...

you can take away a man's broadcasting ability, but you can't take the broadcast out of the man. or, as it would happen, his wife.

Nora pads along behind him with the use of a walker she didn't seem to need earlier - maybe they boogied a little hard at that Senior Prom? - but when the two of them reach the nurses' station, she hefts it up and the two of them slam it against the locked door. A few well-placed blows and it swings open on its hinges.]

Seriously, you'd think they'd make it harder for us to do this shit. [he shoots her a grin, as they hustle inside. Nora braces the walker against the door once it's shut, and Mark proceeds to do what he's done best for the past sixty-five years - steal the air.

the PA system crackles to life, and those of you who still remember him will not be surprised at all to hear a certain song over the airwaves, with a twist: somehow he found a nice, loud, heavy metal cover of his beloved Leonard Cohen. he's got to make sure you can all HEAR it, after all]

Hey hey hey all you out there in Folly Peaks or Holly Tweaks or whatever we're callin' it these days, it's 10 PM, or as close to it as my shitty old biological clock gets, and this is your buddy Hard Harry. I'm broadcasting to you, LIVE, from the only place I can still carry that nickname in any sort of honesty or good faith: that's right, the nurses' station. Nora, honey, hock me over that bottle'a Viagra and LET'S GET CRACKIN'.

[there's a whoop of laughter and a rattle, and he snickers] Right then, down to business. I got my standard issue green jello, I got my little stupid-ass Dixie cup fulla drugs ... Let's see what they put in my cocktail today. Oh, hey, it's my favorite, and yours too, I'm sure: Fukitol! For those days when you just don't care whether you're supposed to keep your ass parked in the craft room or keep your voice down. Or your pants up! HAHA. [as he talks, the rip and scrape of duct tape can be heard. repeatedly]

By the way, just so you know, last I checked, Nurse Jessie was readin' up on whatever Cosmo thinks sex secrets are these days. Since I know we've all been around the block our share of times, why don't we save her seven-fifty next month! I propose everyone write down the craziest thing they've done in the sack during their heyday and leave it in her mailbox. THAT oughta give her some great readin' material, heh heh heh.

I think I've got about two minutes before someone busts in here and tries to drag me back to my room, so I'm just gonna say sayonara for now so I can leave you all with some decent tunes... Yes, that's right, it's the old Duct Tape Tape Deck Hide & Seek Game! All you nurses, have fun figurin' out where I've stuck it this round, and I'll see you next time.

For everyone else out there, this is Hard Harry with your parting words of wisdom: if you can't find it, check Nurse Tina's hair.

[and with the tell-tale CHUNK of the tape deck, the music starts playing. have fun catching Mark and Nora, staff: with the memories they've got at the moment, they've been at this pirate radio gig for decades]