Case #01 [Accidental dictation]

[cantacquityou]

 [Over the journal system, many may hear of the panic of one utterly confounded prosecutor, faintly pleading for directions.]

 

 

 

 ----tomfoolery?! What do you mean I, 'can't get back'? Why, that's preposterous!

 

You, over there. Please, tell me at once! I...I have a briefing to attend in but ten minutes! What could you possibly --No! I have no time for wanton merrymaking! I must get to the courthouse immediately!

 

Since when did eveyone become so miserly with mere directions? I simply want to know how to -- would you please cease that at once!

 

 

 

[...Someone is definitely new here.]

 

Comments

[takethat]

[He repeats the message first before continuing, "I bet you'll feel better about everything if you get some rest."]

[cantacquityou]

[Ruminates about dozens of things - including the possibility of seeming horrendously ungrateful if he were to test the magic theory by ordering a bed.]


...I am feeling a bit peckish. How do I go about 'wishing' up some food?

[takethat]

["Just ask for it! Just tell the castle you want it. You can also make it yourself."]

[cantacquityou]

Ask for it...where?

why the EFF do I not have a pointing icon!!!

[takethat]

[He points to the floor. And then around the room. Shut up pointing is fun]

GOOD FUCKING POINT.

[cantacquityou]

...


...If you are saying what I think you're trying to say, then that is ridiculous.

[takethat]

["Trust me. Try it."

What is this, smugness from Phoenix?!?]

1/2

[cantacquityou]

...



[Thinks for a moment]



Very well. I request...an assortment of various seafood dishes. Perhaps some pan-seared halibut or...smoked salmon crostini and a pasta dish with gratuitous bits of lobster. Perhaps some ...butternut squash soup...and a pot of hot, Opus Rouge Rooibos tea.

2/2

[cantacquityou]

...I feel foolish.

[takethat]

[Shaking with badly-hidden laughter, Phoenix types yet again:

"Awfully creative, aren't you? Sounds delicious! Bet it will be, too."]

[cantacquityou]

You mean to tell me that you are certainly trying to convince me that all this food is going to simply come out of-

[he is then interrupted by a few knocks on the door]




...You have got to be kidding me.

[takethat]

[Still laughing, Phoenix hops to his feet and answers the door. And, of course, it is the requested order, delivered by a couple of ghosts. The food is deposited on his kotatsu and the ghosts are soon gone--all quite normal and par for the course. He watches this with mild interest (mostly in the food) before taking a peek at Edgeworth to see how he's holding up after such a display.]

[cantacquityou]

[Yeah. Not fucking well.]

[takethat]

[...oh.

He crosses the room and waves a hand in front of Edgeworth's eyes to see if he responds.]

[cantacquityou]

[Remains generally unmoving save for slowly pushing Phoenix's hand away.]




...Something tells me I'd have an easier time were I to turn my brain off.

[takethat]

["But then you wouldn't be Edgeworth. Better just enjoy your food before it gets all cold."]

[cantacquityou]

[Sigh]



[Moments later, he goes over to the kotatsu, sits upon his knees and checks everything out. It's more than even he expected. He then finally resigned himself to not thinking too hard about it for now, pours a cup of tea, and peers up at Phoenix.]


Are you not going to eat?

[takethat]

[He quirks an eyebrow.

"It's yours, isn't it?"]

[cantacquityou]

Do you honestly think I can eat this all? Furthermore, do you honestly believe I would be so ill-cultured as to order an excess of fine food and not offer you any?

[takethat]

[Yes, yes he did think that. But if he's invited...

He sits down and peers at the food, trying to remember what Edgeworth had called the various dishes. Everything smells decidedly fishy and delicious, and his stomach gurgles a little, so he happily reaches for the salmon.]

[cantacquityou]

[Sips his tea languidly and silently watches Phoenix for a bit, not yet bothering to touch any of the food.]




...I must honestly say, I expected much more of the place when you mentioned that the castle provides almost 'anything' one could wish for. I do recall you saying at one point that you took pleasure in decorating it, but it seems rather...bare. Is this truly all that you desire?

[takethat]

[Typing while gobbling down some food...

"I consider this decorated."

He swallows the latest mouthful and shrugs.]

[cantacquityou]

...You're a simple one, aren't you?

[takethat]

["No! Just not picky, like I said."

He's making a mess of the well-presented food, but enjoying every bit of it, and gestures at it to remind Edgeworth to eat.]

[cantacquityou]

[Raises a brow]

...



...And what do you normally do when you're here?