ReMask 003

[crownless_king]

You know, it's funny. I can't shake the feeling the whole "mom" thing is a running gag of sorts. You know, something that continues past the realm of this one and the next. Sort of a full reaching kind of thing. Like someone, somewhere, somehow, perpetuates this concept of my rugged, awesome, ridiculously badass self being the "mother" in some respect.

[beat]

Heh, it just struck me...in less than two months, I have rocked a toga and ranked maternal. I'm starting to wonder if the Wonderfuck Castle is trying to tell me something. Maybe some introspective type shit or something. Who knows, maybe it changed since I went home and/or to summer camp for Gods or whatever. I dunno, has it guys? Is Paradisa all grown up and plays nice with the other little cosmic horror kidnapping world beasts? Or...whatever this place is and/or is not.

[There's a momentary pause, some shuffling going on. Something sounds like it's rolling, and there's a very quiet "rip" in the background too.]

Or it could still be made of ass. Can't get too optimistic here. And there we go.

[shuffle shuffle shuffle...and flush. Yes. You're hearing a toilet flushing now.

Yes, he did just admit to a toilet epiphany. And as the flushing ends, the book is shut and the sounds of game saving comes to an end]

Comments

[crownless_king]

Oh you. Flattery will get you everywhere. Or something like that.

You, on the other hand, are just shy of being a portable 4chan. Now if only you didn't have those pesky standards...

[onlyanapple]

Always my aim, Travis. To worm my way into your heart with empty compliments.

Now who's being the flatterer? Though standards are what seperate me from the monkeys.

[crownless_king]

Yes, well, it's working remarkably well. But you gotta pepper it by telling me how pretty my eyes are.

Pffft. If you knew what 4chan is, you'd realize that's the furthest thing from flattery without going subjecting you to Godwin's Law.

[onlyanapple]

You have the prettiest little eyes in the whole wide world. Women and men everywhere swoon with every flutter of your fabulous eyelashes.

Sometimes the twenty first century sounds terrifying. But in the good for business sort of way. Maybe I won't even have to lift a single finger any more to cause human misery. It seems you lot are covering that all by yourselves.

[crownless_king]

Now see, that's proper flattery right there. Why I feel like a schoolgirl on prom night. Albeit it an alcoholic one, but all the same.

You really don't. Al Gore kinda fucked us in the long term with the internet.

[onlyanapple]

The alcoholic ones have all the fun anyway.

May all the little devil children bless you, Mr. Gore.

[crownless_king]

Damn straight we do. You know, up until teen pregnancy. Hm.

Do they really do that? Blessing, I mean? Seems sorta like the opposite thing demons do.

[onlyanapple]

Luckily that's not an issue here in Paradisa land.

It's how we swear.