[Dictated]

[sawyourwolfjunk]

[There's the distinct sound of someone clearing their throat, then a deep breath is taken.]

Attention Paradisa residents. I'd like to bring your attention to a possible transaction. A trade of talent for cold, hard, cash. I have in my possession for the next three weeks, the services of one used to be car, but now totally human dude. He'd make a great butler-for-a-day, as well as being able to get any kinks in your neck out. We'll keep the, uh, services clean, people, so don't make me kick you in the junk.

He whines and moans a lot, but I'm totally cool with you muzzling him for the duration of your purchase.

Starting bid is twenty dollars per hour with a minimum of two hours. Any takers?

Comments

[demontobeloved]

Don't you mean tailpipe?

[sawyourwolfjunk]

Aww, don't rub it in. He's still upset he's a people.

[demontobeloved]

Guess the castle is biased towards humanoids.

[sawyourwolfjunk]

I guess so. But it makes me happy that I don't have to share my room with a car. He'd be pissed if he was stuck in it, and I'd have to hear about it. All. The. Time.

[demontobeloved]

You know him from home, then?

[sawyourwolfjunk]

Briefly. I'm surprised to see him here. Ran into him once at home during an... altercation.

[demontobeloved]

What sort of altercation?

[sawyourwolfjunk]

Oh, you know, the usual. Fae getting pissy and trying to eat us.

[demontobeloved]

Eat you? Bigger than our fae, then.

[sawyourwolfjunk]

Dude, don't tell me your fae are the teeny tiny ones, because those are SO not our fae.

[demontobeloved]

And they only exist in the inbetween. Trust me, there's far worse than fae in my world.

[He used to be one of them]

[sawyourwolfjunk]

Pff. Cruise in my world, buddy boy. The fae there are like, all forms of crap. Vamps and furrybutts are fae. My bestie's a succubus. Most of them can pass for human. Sometimes.

[demontobeloved]

Right. So you call all magical creatures fae. Got it.

[A pause]

I had a run-in with a succubus back home. It wasn't pretty.

[sawyourwolfjunk]

I don't. They do. I though woofies were their own thing until, well, fursplosion in front of me.

[Chews her lip]

Bo's never gotten any complaints. Even when she was sucking the life out of someone. They usually go with a smile.

[demontobeloved]

Guess its just down to personal preference, I guess. Just don't be calling me a fae, okay?

[And Cole shifts.]

Demons and Succubi don't usually get along in my world. Call it encroaching on each other's terretories.

[sawyourwolfjunk]

Aww, but Tinkerdemon works so well for you.

Well, huh. Bo's not exactly like the other fae. [Said somewhat defensively, because, hello, bestie.] She got cranked out for not marking her territory by her succubitch mom. She doesn't even know how.

[demontobeloved]

I don't sparkle. [Said in a tone that he doesn't appreciate that name. At all.]

And that sounds like it sucks.

[sawyourwolfjunk]

We could fix that. [Smirks]

Haha. I see what you did there. Sucks. Succubus. Funny guy, Cole.

[demontobeloved]

You really couldn't. And I try.

[sawyourwolfjunk]

There's bound to be glittery sparkle stuff around here somewhere...

[demontobeloved]

And what makes you think you'll get close with it?

[sawyourwolfjunk]

What makes you think I won't?

[demontobeloved]

I'm fairly confident in my own self-defence.

[sawyourwolfjunk]

No one can defend against the sparkles.

[demontobeloved]

Did you forget I can teleport?