it resulted in eighteen blackouts

[notjamesbond]

[Why, hello Paradisa! Why, what a beautiful day! The sun is shining, the birds outside are singing, somewhere a very disagreeable doctor is drugging a hyperactive pony, and overall it seems like a wonderful day to go out and seize the day.]

[Not for Newton Pulsifer. Because currently, he's falling out a window.]

[How in the world did this travesty happen? Well, because Newt can be sort of a klutz sometimes. Especially without those large coke-bottle glasses of his, which he just accidentally dropped out the window because he made the very stupid decision to clean his glasses while he was standing next to it. When he dropped them , he lunged, and he fell over the balcony, and that is how one Newton Pulsifer came to fall out of a window.]

[But the castle had other plans! For as his life is flashing through his eyes (oh, that's where he put that school textbook in third grade), there's a loud ripping sound, and two white wings come bursting out of his back, billowing wide behind him.]

[Unfortunately, this reaction was a few seconds too late, and decidedly rather useless in the end.]

[So, now there is now a large white-feathered heap of a person underneath one of the windows outside, swearing loudly in very colorful British terms that can be heard all around the castle, as his journal has fallen open by his side.]

What in the BLOODY HELL?!?

[Do you dare to find out what went wrong, Paradisans? Because it looks like you might have a very grumpy angel on your hands.]

[ooc: Loss start! Come and bother angelized Newt over here. :D]

Comments

[technohap]

[Henry's walking around the grounds today. It's his first time out since his own loss and when he sees the man fall, he runs over to help. But as he gets closer, his tablet shuts off and he starts to feel nauseous and it hurt to move. Within a minute of lossing his tech, Henry had thrown up, just missing the man by inches.]

[notjamesbond]

[Newt's head is still spinning, and he blinks, the world a fuzzy blur as he pulls himself upright and struggles to find the glasses that fell out of the window only a moment before. Right now, there are two very white things near him, and there's some kind of figure which is seemingly...throwing up, from the sound of it? What gives?]

Oi, it's not like I'm bleeding...how disgusting. And where in the name of sanity are my glasses? I can't see a thing...

[He begins to pat around for them, more focused on his own matters than why this man is being sick nearby. There are a ton of aches and pains in his joints, but the most important thing here, clearly is to see what is going on.]

[technohap]

[Henry would usually try and help you but he's doing his best not to puke again. But he fails and this time it lands all over his new wings.] Sorry...

[notjamesbond]

[The guy just threw up on him. THE GUY JUST THREW UP ON HIM. Newt gives the verbal version of a keysmash, backpedalling backwards from the man-shaped blur. And he has to jump slightly in surprise because he felt that. As in, the white things had feeling in them and WHAT IS GOING ON.]

You blithering git, you just...ugh, today is not my day! Not my day at all!

[He tries to reach around to wipe it off, but whether it's the annoyance or the stress or the fact that he's now a celestial being that can influence reality, something changes, and suddenly, the wet spots on his wings are suddenly red. Newt sniffs. Wine. It had been changed to wine.]

[...What.]

[onlyanapple]

[Crowley saw a Newt-shaped-thing sail past his window and thought perhaps maybe it was worth investigating. Not that he cared or anything. Not at all. So he opens the window and looks down.

Huh. Wings]

That's new.

[notjamesbond]

[Don't mind him, Crowley, he is just going to keep swearing until he finally decides that swearing isn't really the best thing to do at the moment. Really, where are his stupid glasses?]

I need to find them, the idiotic things...

[He can vaguely hear a very snide voice in the background, but assumes it's just himself telling himself that he is an idiot for what he just did.]

[onlyanapple]

[Crowley considers, before (largely to show him up but also to provide a demonstration of how it's supposed to be done) unurling his wings, taking to the sky before landing beside him]

I give you a 0.1.

[notjamesbond]

[He recognizes the voice and squints up at the blurry black figure with a sort of sneer, trying to figure out what Crowley wants with him this time and not quite realizing that the large white blurs near him are not, in fact, as a result of brain damage, but the same things which Crowley is showing off right now.]

What are you showing off your bloody wings for, you idiot? Didn't you just noticed I fell out of a window? No? Or was it a bit hard for you to grasp that idea?

[He groans, rubbing at his eyes with an exasperated frown.]

God, I need my glasses, I can't see anything without those things...

[modernholmes]

[Most of the time when Conan encountered screaming bodies falling from buildings there was only one possible conclusion. This was not that conclusion. Have a small child approaching you in some confusion.]

[notjamesbond]

[Hi, Conan, have some very harsh swear words in return. Until he realizes that someone has approached, and he pulls himself up, blinking at the blur in front of him.]

What are you standing there for? Go find my glasses! I can't see a thing without them...

[modernholmes]

[After a few brief calculations of the physics involved Conan retrieves the glasses and hands them over.]

[notjamesbond]

[He takes them, putting them on and blinking a few times in the hopes that the white spots will go away and he won't have to go to a doctor or something.]

[Unfortunately, the white things do not go away, and in fact turn out to be very large and feathery. He squints. No, wait, that can't be, they kind of look like...]

What. Wait, what? What are these? Somebody must be playing a prank on me, right? No way these can't be real.

[unnaturalpause]

[Hi Newt! Have a snowball tossed up over at you from a kid a little ways away. Because dude, swearing, wtfh man :|]

Hey, mister, watch what you say!

[notjamesbond]

Watch what I say?! I just fell out of a bloody stinkin' window, and you are really concerned about what I'm saying?

[The snowball hits him, and he groans in annoyance and surprise, trying to understand what is happening as the world blurs around him. Where are his glasses when he needs them? He tries to glare in the general direction of where the voice came from.]

Did you just throw a snowball at me, you little brat?

[unnaturalpause]

Yeah 'cause it's not nice. There are ladies here, mister.

[And you're always nice to ladies, right? Well according to his mother anyway you were. Or supposed to be. Whatever.

Point remains he's just slowly approaching him now, trying to figure this out. Fell out a window, and lived? Wow Newt, what are you?]

Maybe, or it was the goblin. [And now he's lying, but this is just, way to fun.]

[notjamesbond]

Where?

[OH GOD oh god please let him not have upset any ladies. Wait, what he so concerned about? And why does it feel like there's something really heavy on his back?]

What goblin? What are you talking about? ...Okay, look, find my glasses! I'm practically blind without them.

[demontobeloved]

[There's a demon standing around in the general area as he watches this.]

Ooh. More angels. Wonderful.

[notjamesbond]

Angel? What are you talking about?!

[Newt is a blind bat without his glasses, so he has no idea what these large white blurs are supposed to be. God, he hopes he didn't get brain damage.]

I just fell out of a window, and you're talking about angels. Last time I checked, I wasn't Aziraphale, you moron.

[demontobeloved]

So, you're not an angel?

...the castle seems to be getting predictable, then.

[A pause]

By the way, those big white things? Wings.

[ofkirkwall]

[ Hello Newt, don't mind Hawke she's just standing nearby with her wardog trying her hardest not to laugh her ass off at that display. It's hard. Someone should give her a medal. ]

Very graceful.

[notjamesbond]

[Newt, not to be deterred, just swears a little more, before he realizes that that blurry dark spot in front of him is a person. A person who is also a woman, from the sounds of it. He gulps, trying to get to his knees as he answers, dryly:]

I just fell out of a window, I don't think I had the time to think about looking good while I was doing it.

[ofkirkwall]

Should have used those pretty decorations earlier, it would have fooled everyone into thinking you're cooler than you are. [ Dog barks in... apparent agreement. Yeah you're totally not cool Newt. ]

[thwarting]

[Aziraphale had been enjoying a nice stroll, when he was almost squashed by a falling--]

--Mr. Pulsifer?!

[notjamesbond]

[Don't mind him, Aziraphale, he's just going to lie here and swear loudly in very image-filled British terms before he gets himself upright and blearily looks at the blur-filled world around him.]

...Aziraphale?

[thwarting]

[Pausing for a moment, considering how to say this politely, he eventually just sort of gestured vaguely.]

Those are new.