19 - Bandido - backdated to evening 10th - Dictated / Action in clinic

[radiantwingedone]

[ It sounds like the journal dropped open as someone moved a bed, followed by someone settling next to it, and the crooning of a pokemon.

After a moment, Duke speaks up. ]

.... Fairly sure late... [ He's got that hoarse voice of someone who not only was asleep for a while, but had recently gotten rid of anything that had been in their stomach for the last week. ]

However... have any else spent time that marked a year here.... in the clinic? [ Totally not mentioning the nightmares. He's going to pretend those nightmares never existed. ]

.... cannot have been only one...

[ Action for Clinic ]

[ And Duke is going to stay wedged in a corner made from one of the beds and the wall, if anyone wants to bother him in the clinic. He's not planning on leaving for a little while.

This is how he plans on dealing with his nightmare. ]

Comments

[radiantwingedone]

...... [ That is a tricky question Martel. ]

... nearly mostly.

[heal_theworld]

Nearly mostly? That sounds like a 'no'. [she pauses.] Want to talk about it?

[radiantwingedone]

.... [ No, he doesn't really.

Although his Altaria seems to think he should, as when he sort of tucks himself into a more defensive sit, she whacks him upside the head with a wing and scolds. ]

I'm sore and tired, but don't wish to attempt to sleep. [ Because the best way to avoid nightmares and whatever else lurks in the corners of one's mind is to stay awake, right? Totally. ]

[heal_theworld]

If you don't sleep, you won't get better. Staying awake and thinking about it isn't any better. ...I don't think, at least.

[radiantwingedone]

.... Haven't been thinking about it either. [ But given how stiff he sounds about saying that, he's probably not telling the truth... ]

... Don't want them to come back.

[heal_theworld]

...Neither do I. You ...er, saw what happened. [She died on you. And that wasn't entirely the worst one.]

[radiantwingedone]

[ It wasn't exactly the worse one for him either. ]

... Another memory that was... unpleasant. [ He remembers hearing you died. Or were dead from a shared world. ]

[heal_theworld]

I'm sorry that happened. That I kind of...died on you.

[radiantwingedone]

.... [ Duke sits really still for a moment, and then tucks himself up with his blanket and wedges himself in the corner some more. ]

... Not the only one.

[heal_theworld]

...Other people died in your dreams?

[radiantwingedone]

..... Tends to be the main recurring one. [ And he's bundling more into his blanket. ]

[heal_theworld]

Duke... [She sighs.] I know it hurts, but you can't stop people from dying. Not if it's their time.

[radiantwingedone]

.... And why do a bunch of... stupid humans get to decide when it is someone's time?

[ He's not really talking about Martel's dream. ]

[heal_theworld]

[Sorry, Duke. Martel is narrowing her eyes and leaning in closer, poking him in the chest.] Do not call any humans stupid. They may not understand, they may be prejudiced, but I fought most of my life to let elves, humans, half-elves, and those in between live in equality and harmony. They may have been wrong to attack and kill whoever you lost, but by calling them 'stupid humans' and not be willing to understand, you bring it full circle. It's a cycle of vicious hate that will never end until it is broken by someone taking the first step and reaching out.

I'm sorry for your loss, but but you can't keep discriminating against them when not all of them are like the ones who killed your loved one. that will only lead to more hate and more people dying.

My sister noticed but but

[radiantwingedone]

[ He had not been expecting that poke, so his jump is a big one, and his head meets the wall behind him. ]

Even when it is the one whom they owe their continued existence too? If it wasn't for him and I, they would not have been able to collect well enough to plot anything of the sort. [ And he knows that. He knows that, and Brave Vesperia beat that back into him, but at the same time...

His nightmares are fresher than his memories of them. ]

Have been avoiding that second, avoiding all of them because I know that. However cannot know when one will take offense to me for some reason that I do not understand, same as reasons for friend - reason why, even, he wanted to protect- [ And Duke didn't know if he could do that, when he didn't know if he could trust humans.

If he looks like he's thinking about hiding, that is accurate - his hand searches the edge of the bed he's sitting near to see if there's room for him under it. ]

[heal_theworld]

The same thing happened to me. I helped stop a war and was trying to heal a tree that the entire existence of everything living on my planet depends on, and a human stabbed me. Because they didn't think a half-elf should have that much power. But I can't hate humans just because of that one human.

If you avoid them, it will only get worse. They won't know what to expect, they won't understand anything about you, and that makes them afraid. And he wanted to protect them because he was a good person. And even though he's dead, he would want you to do the same.

[radiantwingedone]

.. I don't... [ He doesn't think it burns enough, anymore, to be hate.

Granted, the word Lowell used - 'despise' - isn't that much better. Thinking about what she said first was more painful than second, so he'll... avoid. ]

They don't even remember us. [ And please say there's enough room under the bed for him because Duke is going to try to curl up under there. ]

I know that.

[heal_theworld]

[Martel catches him before he can get underneath the bed.] Then tell me. What did you do that they don't remember?

[radiantwingedone]

They remember nothing of who I am. [ Its a bitter amused tone he's got there. ]

Saved them. My friend and I sided against his own kind to allow them to live. We won. [ He tugs a little to try to get away, but goes back to still. ]

They remember nothing of that. They know it ended.

[heal_theworld]

[She gives him a sad smile back.] I helped stop a war. Nobody remembers that. Nobody remembers I'm an actual person anymore. My brother made sure that they would all worship me as a Goddess, and never remember I was an actual woman with flaws and hopes and dreams.

People's memories are short. Especially when someone erases history.

[radiantwingedone]

... It's been ten years. [ He doesn't know how long Martel has been dead for her world, but he thought Genis had said for some time.

But even then, he's not really that upset that he'd been forgotten. With how humans acted, he was fine with no one remembering who he was, what he was like, or how strong he is. ]

Seems.. very short.