Fifty Ninth Sip

[mal_addict]

[Maladict is frustrated. It's bad enough the castle favours Earth holidays above all others, but now this...idiocy has occurred. She doesn't mind the drinks turning into alcohol, as was the case in other years, because after all, people being drunk at this time of the year on the Disc was fairly regular.

...But this was something else entirely]

Another well spent Hogswatch in this ridiculous place, then. When you people stop being idiots, you'll get your gifts from me.

Comments

[mal_addict]

Right now? Attempting not to murder James, to which I mean I'm absolutely free.

[hard_talker]

Sounds like the perfect opportunity for a caffeine and nicotine break, if you ask me.

[mal_addict]

Those words were complete music to my ears. Tis the season, and all that.

[samson]

Then you should've gotten me, like, a Nerf sword if you're so concerned.

[mal_addict]

And this would be the part where you'd have to explain to me what a 'Nerf' actually is, so I can get the joke.

[hard_talker]

Sweet. Roof or front door, then?

[mal_addict]

Let's go for the roof. We can mock the brooders.

[hard_talker]

Always a good plan. Meetcha there!

[and he'll bring the souped up boombox Eleven gave him, pop in a Cranberries tape, and lean against the wall to wait, bundled up in a leather jacket and scarf. for a shy guy, he sure knows how to look like a professional slacker. must be the age bracket]

[eat_me_beat_me]

Ha fucking ha. [like that isn't true...] Yeah let's all just have a big laugh at my expense.

[samson]

[Someday he'll stop doing that ...]

Oh. Right. It's, uh, like foam toys. For kids, so they don't hurt themselves. They make swords and footballs and stuff like that.

[mal_addict]

[He's so good at that, and in her own good time, Maladict makes her way over, giving him a lazy wave as she approaches ]

'Lo Mark.

[mal_addict]

I don't mind if I do, actually.

[mal_addict]

So the children don't learn to practise with say, wooden swords?

[samson]

Well, they're not really practicing. It's just playing.

[mal_addict]

Oh. Well, kids play with wooden swords where I come from, as well as train. Generally if you play with them you inevitably want to learn how to use one.

[samson]

Nah, swords aren't really a thing where I come from. Well, unless you're like, a ninja or a supervillain or something. Most people use guns ...

[mal_addict]

Ah. Guns. The best we have that way are pistol crossbows. Given the mentality of a lot of people in my world, it's probably for the best we don't have actual guns.

[samson]

Guns are stupid, anyway. I don't touch 'em.

[mal_addict]

There have to me more dignified ways to end a person's existence than that, after all.

[samson]

Right? Exactly. Plus there's no skill to it, just pointing and pulling a trigger. You gotta have guts to actually kill a guy with your bare hands.

[mal_addict]

You have to look 'em right in the eyes most of the time.

[eat_me_beat_me]

Yeah yeah. Like nothing's ever happened ot you before.

[mal_addict]

Of course it has. I make it a point not to broadcast it to everyone.

[samson]

Or at least listen to them whining about it.

[hard_talker]

Hey, Sarge! [he pulls a pack of cigarettes out of his shirt pocket and offers it up]

Happy late Hogswatch.