105.1 - we will not drink to blindness, dear

[hard_talker]

[instead of Leonard Cohen, this week, everyone gets this little gem piped through their radios and/or over the journals...]

Soooooo, hey, big surprise, the castle went on a little New Year's bender and had a bunch of us make total jackasses out of ourselves! Complete with a jackass queen, which, I gotta admit, was kind of a nice touch. But all in all, I'm surprised the castle even felt like it had to lift a finger. You guys are makin' enough waves on your own! Gold star to whoever made that royal, fishy-smelling mess out of the kitchen the other day. Real nice.

People's resolutions seem to be all over the fuckin' place - though a few of you decided the best way to ring in the year was to get yourselves knocked the fuck out. Nice job, guys.

Lessee, what else've we got on the menu ... some jerkass tried the annual Ploy To Take Over The Castle - try harder, dude, seriously ... there was a nice, thorny little question about revenge that got tossed out for the masses ... we've got a few people who're gonna go basically put up Biohazard signs in the Dead Zone because they didn't get enough Common Sense in their Christmas stockings ... and oh yeah, apparently we're a monarchy now, if you care about that sorta thing. Queen Anne vs. Mr. Many, I'm gonna start taking bets on the match now. But how's it gonna play out, sports fans? Fisticuffs? Pistols at dawn? Rock Paper Scissors? Your guess is as good as mine!

While we wait for the latest development in this thrilling clash of titans, why don't we give the first newbie shout-out of the year to Blues, Rise, some guy convinced he's the Easter Bunny - do we still have a shrink in the castle? - DeMarco, and Frodo! Buckle up, it's all up and down hills from here. Please stow all loose items - cameras, handbags, journals, emotional fuckin' baggage - in the net bins below your seats, and like hell do we expect you to remain seated for the duration of the ride.

Now, if you'll excuse me, I've got some prime fucking entertainment to get to, tonight - any of you ever try to watch someone who's the same size as a video game controller play Glyph Factory? Because it's pretty hysteric-- OW! JESUS.

[someone's fairy-loss girlfriend just dropped said controller on his head]

After school special lesson of the week, kids. Don't make fun of vertically challenged people. Till next time, this is your neighborhood DJ Hard Harry, reminding you to take the mundane outta Monday.

Stop throwing fucking Pez at my head, Nora, for Christsakes...

Comments

[eat_me_beat_me]

Then stop fucking making fun of me.

[She sticks out her tongue, picking up another pez that - to her at least - is the size of a brick.]

[hard_talker]

[he catches the next one and drops it into his soda with a smirk] Oh c'mon. Not like there's anything else I can do about it.

[courageous_wit]

[oh, Mark, always a delight. Except...] The Easter Bunny? That's a new one.

[hard_talker]

Tell me about it. Next we're gonna get a guy who thinks he's Uncle Sam, right?

dictated;

[ensorceler]

[ Meanwhile, Anne is just staring at this contraption that got delivered to her room like it's been possessed by Satan. After turning it down and around to check it out, and fiddling with the knobs and whatnot, she lets out a startled yelp at the sudden voice coming from it.

She'd quickly throw it in her fire if she hadn't just heard her name, which makes her crouch down and listen more closely. Completely unaware she's even being mocked, she picked up the journal to see the broadcast has been transcribed, and asks curiously, ]

Mister Many? Who is this? I would have words with him.

[hard_talker]

Nobody knows yet, but the way he shoots his big fat dumbass mouth off, it's just a matter of time.

Dictated

[wizard_redfive]

His name is Bunnymund, and yes, he is actually the Easter Bunny. [The whole believing is seeing thing managed to convince her.]

[Dairine bursts out laughing at Mark's pained exclaimation. Some friend she is.]

Let me guess - Nora's on loss?

Re: Dictated

[hard_talker]

He is, huh? .... [that earns a thoughtful noise. he hadn't thought God was the genuine article at first, either...]

Yeah, you haven't seen? She's a fairy. Wings and all. [he does not sound enthused]

[thatrabbitsdynamite]

[EXCUSE you, Mark]

'Convinced' he's the Easter Bunny? Mate, I am the Easter Bunny.

[originalcopy]

Hey do you know the tooth fairy? That bitch owes me money.

sorry I'm late, distracted by glorious threadjacking

[hard_talker]

Uh huh, sure. Anyone tell you you're early?

[solowingpixy]

[He's going to have a bit of a laugh at the 'monarchy' bit. You know, a good mocking sort of laugh.]

Politics in this place? You've got to be kidding.

[hard_talker]

I know, tell me about it. .... Hey, you sound new. Did I miss somebody?

[originalcopy]

Wait... there's an Easter Bunny here now? That's messed up.

[hard_talker]

No, not really, what's messed up is that I've talked to God. And he was dressed like a janitor.

dictated forever! idk maybe he'll filter later too

[valuedstrength]

[Wow there's a lot here to comment on. Let him pick the least important thing.]

... Are you sure he really isn't the Easter Bunny?

yes, they need to talk about Hank

[hard_talker]

Not till I see some proof. I know we got demons and gods here, but this is a little funky for me to just take at face value. I ain't been here that long.

[he is also eighteen. so there's that]

[the_effect_she_has]

Blah blah blah, aren't you always telling us that we need to get out and do something?

[hard_talker]

[yes, good, Katniss, call him on his own bullshit, more people need to do that]. Hey, I'll have you know I have an arm wrestling match scheduled with a tiger tomorrow. How'd the bear tracking go?

[therealrisette]

Huh?! Is this... a radio show?

[Rise happened to hear her name mentioned on this... broadcast? Whatever. Along with what sounded like highlights from all over Paradisa lately. She couldn't help but giggle - this place is weird.

But she's still confused about one thing. Well, more than one thing, but one thing in particular stands out. And she accidentally blurts it out with the journal still open.]

What's an... Easter Bunny?

[hard_talker]

Sure is, every Monday night at ten. .... And you don't know what Easter is, or what a bunny is? I wanna be sure which part I gotta explain.

Dictated;

[wilder]

Careful man. Make fun of her too much and maybe you'll wake up a fairy too.

[hard_talker]

Don't jinx me, dude, or I'll put the tiny fairy whammy on you, too.

[silentrunning]

[Chell lets out a cackle over the journal... Before sobering just a little.]

How does one play video games when one is so small?

[She's totally expecting freaking pez to come flying through her journal...]

And um... What are pez? Also, I vote for rock paper scissors.

[hard_talker]

She just kind of lays the remote on the desk and steps on the buttons. Like that dancing game in the game room.

As for Pez, it's a kinda candy. They're shaped like little pills and you put 'em in a plastic case that pops 'em out one by one. I got a bunch of 'em if you want one.