Twenty Two Spoons {Written, Backdated to earlier this morning}

[cyan_maid]

{(BROKEN) Filtered to: Dirk Strider}

Hello, Dirk.
How are you doing? Well, I hope.
You must hate me for how I
I don’t blame you because I hate me too
I know we’re…not. And that you’ll most definitely ignore this.
I don’t even know why I bothered to filter it to you, I should’ve just made it private.
But I digress.
I wanted to say…that you were right about everything.
I have sat, and thought, and accepted that I am a coward when it comes to telling the truth about my emotions. And I only have myself to blame when it causes everyone grief.
But I cannot accept staying that way. I’ll just keep hurting the friends I have left.
That is the problem, right? I can’t own up to anything I feel until it’s killing me inside, and then I let it jump out, and it hurts everyone. Well no more!
I’ll tell the truth about everything, and I won’t tiptoe around a single thing no matter how scared I am!
I don’t care if it takes me a thousand years of living in this castle until there is no one else left, and I don’t care if I never earn back your friendship! I shalln’t let anything stop me!!!

Comments

voice;

[goingrogue]

Uh... Jane, I think you might need to check your filters, because I know for a fact I did not start hackin' in my sleep and... I'm pretty sure you didn't mean for people to see this, considering the private nature of what's going on in your text there.

Dictated, 1/? (I'll let you know when it's done)

[cyan_maid]

Wha...

2/?

[cyan_maid]

[What?]

3/?

[cyan_maid]

[WHAT??]

4/4 Kay that's it

[cyan_maid]

B-but I DID!!!!!!!!

[No no no she made double and TRIPLE sure she filtered this BEFORE she even wrote a single letter HOW CAN ROXY SEE THIS]

[goingrogue]

Are you sure about that? I mean, super duper sure? Ultra mega sure? I would think if you did I wouldn't be able to see this right now. I'm not gonna pretend I'm not the least bit nosy, but I do know a thing or two about privacy and all. And I don't think I coulda hacked it if I tried.

[cyan_maid]

[That was either a groan or a sob. Jane can't even tell which it was.]

Oh my GOD...

[patching_up]

Jane...?

[She's one of the few people he knows so far, and here she is in emotional distress; he can't help but be concerned.]

Are you okay?

It's... not always wrong to be afraid, you know.

Suddenly Dictated, (BROKEN) Filtered to 5

[cyan_maid]

N-Not really??

[She is definitely panicked over here.]

I didn't mean for people to see this!!!

Dictated, (BROKEN) Filtered to Jane

[patching_up]

Oh no, I-I'm sorry--

[He seems to be flustering; the sound of tiny metal fingers clicking together in nervousness can be heard.]

This is the second time this has happened... I'm really sorry, I'm-- you--

You sound... hurt. I know it's probably not my business, though... i-if you don't want me to pry, I won't.

Dictated, (BROKEN) Filtered to 5

[cyan_maid]

I-It's not your fault! There's got to be something wrong with the journals because I know I made this quite private.

[kungfuwitch]

Oh. Oh sweetie. I'm not trying to eavesdrop or anything but that... wasn't filtered.

Dictated

[cyan_maid]

It well should have been!! What's going on here, do you know???

Dictated forever

[kungfuwitch]

It seems this is the castle's doing. Allen says it's happened before.

[cyan_maid]

UGH!

It is ALWAYS the castle's fault!

dictated;

[is_mafia]

...Ah, Jane?

[An awkward pause because he's not quite sure how to tell her he can see that obviously personal message.]

You may want to check the filter on that.

Dictated

[cyan_maid]

[WHY DOES EVERYONE FEEL THE NEED TO POINT OUT WHAT HAS HAPPENED.]

I've checked it several times now. I don't know why it's not working!! Oh my God...

Dictated

[is_mafia]

[HE WASN'T SURE WHAT WAS GOING ON.]

Not many people can have seen it yet... perhaps if you scribble it out? [He's trying to be helpful, okay.]

Dictated

[cyan_maid]

I don't know if I can???

[brohoof]

Can I just first say; congratulations.
You managed to take something private and broadcast it to the entire castle.
Good job, Jane.
Seriously I mean it, good fuckin' job.
I wanted everyone to know about all of this.

THERE HE IS

[cyan_maid]

I didn't do it on purpose!!!
I filtered it to you and ONLY you, I swear it on my Poppop's stuffed corpse!!!!
How the heck was I supposed to know that this would happen? It's NEVER happened to me before!!!!!!!

the pissy teen of the hour~

[brohoof]

Calm your ass down before you exhaust the castle's supply of exlamation points.
What's done is done, the laundry already laid out to air.
So it doesn't really matter now, and being a prissy bitch about it isn't going to get me anywhere.
I'll just accept the fact that now people know what a fucked up clusterfuck of teen angst you and I both are.

[truestsciences]

dont think he can ignore it anymore

[cyan_maid]

You're not helping!!!!!!!

[truestsciences]

wwasnt tryin to be
but wwhatevver your problem is wwith him it cant be that bad so just deal wwith it and i dunno
punch him until he listens or somethin
do it in person so nobody else has to listen to your problems evven if its too late noww