129.0

[encryptedlock]

[Okay, York feels a little silly for actually writing out this filter, but...well. There's the half-remembered time as a demented old guy and then there's some actual physical proof.]

[The Easter Bunny]

Hey, uh. Well. Thanks. I don't think we've ever had a holiday this fun without side effects from the chocolate like turning into chickens or something equally ridiculous.

[He pauses awkwardly, because way to go talking to the Easter Bunny. But hell, he'd talked to Jesus Christ here before, so why not?]

Anyway. Not sure if you'll stick around here now that the holiday's over, but I just wanted to let you know I had a great time. And this chocolate is really something else.

[The Easter Bunny]

[And now that that's out of the way....]

If anyone tries any pranks like replacing my coffee's sugar with salt tomorrow, you're going to find hot sauce in your pants. Just fair warning.

Comments

Dictated

[deltacain]

Sounds fair.

[encryptedlock]

[Not a voice he's heard before, but that never stopped York before.]

Well, you can never tell with April Fools Day. I figure it's better to be safe than sorry.

[deltacain]

Yeah? What examples of "sorry"?

[David assumes this guy's been here for a while.]

[encryptedlock]

[A wise assumption.]

There was one time someone put plastic wrap on the toilets so nothing could get in. Messy.

[deltacain]

That person sounds like an evil genius.

[David sounds impressed.]

I'm David, by the way. Professor David Webb.

[encryptedlock]

Freelancer Agent York, UNSC. Most people just call me York. First April in the castle?

[Considering the name isn't familiar, it's probably like first day or two in the castle.]

[deltacain]

UNSC? [Sounds like a government organisation. Not one Webb's heard of before.]

And, yeah. First everything here. Still trying to convince myself this isn't a dream. People spouting magic when I first got here doesn't help.

[originalcopy]

You know, that almost sounds like a challenge.

[encryptedlock]

Uh-huh. Just remember, Church, I know how to disable your armor.

[originalcopy]

Could be totally worth it.

[Besides, he has his old body back as a spare.]

[encryptedlock]

Or you could wake up in a pocket calculator. Just fair warning.

[originalcopy]

...

You wouldn't...

[Not cool, bro. Not cool.]

[encryptedlock]

That, my friend, depends entirely on the severity of the pranking that reaches my doorstep tomorrow.

/because we need this CR

[savethedarkness]

Oh for Godsakes. That is coming right up, isn't it. [M does not sound impressed]

Well, if nothing else, I appreciate the warning.

yus

[encryptedlock]

[...Something about her tone actually makes York blink and go into "talking to a superior officer" mode.]

Afraid it is, ma'am. Sip before you drink, taste before you eat, and all that.

[savethedarkness]

[now that's a tone she likes hearing, even from total strangers. bonus points for you, York.]

And check your doors before you walk through. Had a man coat my office doorway in cellophane wrap once.

[encryptedlock]

[York snorts a laugh.]

It's have to be pretty stiff plastic to block me out, but I do have some resourceful "friends". Thanks for the tip.

[savethedarkness]

Not the sort of information I'm used to providing, not by a long shot. But still, glad to be of help.

[encryptedlock]

Oh yeah? [Information, eh?] Mind if I ask what might be more up your alley?

This guy

[thatrabbitsdynamite]

...You sound familiar. [That's his way of saying hello]

And you're welcome, mate. You're right, it's about time you lot had a decent holiday. [Without...you know. ISSUES]

Looks like I'll be around for as long as the castle wants me.

The Friggin Easter Bunny

[encryptedlock]

[Whoa, he actually answered. York taps his fingers on the surprisingly tasty chocolate egg he'd found in his room earlier.]

I think I thought you were a therapy rabbit a couple weeks ago. Sorry about that. I wasn't really in my right mind.

Anyway, I sure appreciate it. I mean, I don't want to sound like some ignorant adult or anything, but do we leave carrots or anything...?

This guy

[thatrabbitsdynamite]

That's what most people thought I was, no harm, no foul. It was the castle messing with people again.

[And York wins TEN THOUSAND COOL POINTS just for asking] It's up to you. I appreciate them being left. It makes listening to North crow about all his bloody cookies a little easier to deal with.

Easter Bunny

[encryptedlock]

[Hey, it's only fair. Besides, there aren't really that many mythical people who actually do show up here--and the chocolate really is good.]

North--? Oh. I'm guessing you don't mean my buddy Agent North Dakota.

[Yeah dude, you're getting a couple pounds of carrots as soon as he can go buy some in town. Can't repay a favor with wished carrots, after all.]

This guy

[thatrabbitsdynamite]

Huh? Oh...no. The North I know is... well you lot know him better as Santa.

[Hells yes he can eat himself into a carrot coma and his life will be beautiful again]

Easter Bunny

[encryptedlock]

Right. I'll have a chat with my North about filters, then.

--Hey, not to be rude or anything, but will the eggs keep if I want to save a couple for later?