☁ 001 | written

[nooooo]

[April woke up three hours ago, and she has no idea what's going on.

Okay, so that's not 100% true. She's explored her room and scanned the journal, so she has an extremely basic idea (sitting in what looks like a really fancy hotel room, in possession of a weird communal journal that doesn't seem to obey the laws of physics, something big involving a lion happened a few days ago), but beyond that? Absolutely no clue.

Right now, the journal is the most interesting thing. It's definitely the most unusual, and so she figures that if she wants her other questions answered, it's her best bet.

Especially because it seems like people are using it to communicate. Somehow.

First she has to test it out, though. She could introduce herself to everyone, or write an impassioned plea for information, or start screaming her head off about having been kidnapped. But... nah. Instead, she'll do this:]



[OOC: If you want your character to play tic-tac-toe with her, just save the image to your computer and draw in their O! Or, if you can't/don't want to do that, you can tell me which spot their put their O in and I'll fill it in myself.]

Comments

[Dictated]

[putuporshutup]

[She laughs for a while because really, that's the funniest thing she's heard all day.]

Good one, newbie. But if I were you, I'd get used to the idea that you're stuck here for a while.

[Dictated]

[nooooo]

Are you saying I'm in a coma?

[Dictated]

[putuporshutup]

Nah, more like stuck in a magical castle that pulls people from different worlds and keeps us here as damn long as it pleases.

[Dictated]

[nooooo]

[In a deep, dramatic tone:]

A new film by Guillermo del Toro!

[Dictated]

[putuporshutup]

Don't give it that much credit. The plots make M. Night Shamalamadingdong look good, but maybe that's just me.

[Dictated]

[nooooo]

Oh, yeah? Details.

[Dictated]

[putuporshutup]

Do I look like google to you?

[Dictated]

[nooooo]

Oh right, I'll just write "www.google.com" into this notebook.

[Dictated]

[putuporshutup]

There actually is a network in the castle, but it's just got a bunch of stupid games. I'm still not here to hold your hand, though.

[Sigh.]

But I suppose if you want to play 20 questions, I don't have a whole lot else to do.

[Dictated]

[nooooo]

So so you're not here to answer questions, but you're here to answer questions? Super. Thanks for the clarification.

Why am I here?

[Dictated]

[putuporshutup]

Shut up.

[She's just not putting any effort into this. Fight her.]

Because the evil sentient castle wants you for some reason. Next?

[Dictated]

[nooooo]

[Meg and Spike are both her spirit animals.]

How are people supposed to believe that for real?

[Dictated]

[putuporshutup]

[Yeah she's rad she knows]

Usually around the time the floor opens up and spews nineties movies starring Robin Williams and too much CGI into our actual lives.

Seriously, give it a few weeks and you'll see some shit.

[Dictated]

[nooooo]

So I... what. Just exist here? No way out?

... Okay, first I'm gonna leave this room.

[Dictated]

[putuporshutup]

Pretty much. It's actually a decent place when it's not screwing with you on a deeply personal level.

You drink?

[Dictated]

[nooooo]

I'm not pregnant or an eleven-year-old child, so...

[Dictated]

[putuporshutup]

Good answer.

[She flips the stained page of her journal and scrawls directions to the death match from the lobby.]

That's how you get to my bar. Think you can figure that out on your own or do I need to come fetch you myself, smarty pants?

[Dictated]

[nooooo]

I'll be there in like point-five seconds; this is a dream, so I bet I can fly.

[Dictated]

[putuporshutup]

You do that, R. Kelly. In the mean time, what can I get started for you?

[Customer service, she has it]

[Dictated]

[nooooo]

Whiskey sour.

[...]

Uh, what would this totally-real-not-at-all-a-dream magic castle have done with my wallet?

[Dictated]

[putuporshutup]

Good girl.

[Any other chick that orders whiskey gets automatic cool points.]

Wouldn't matter. Money's different here, but you don't really need it unless you go into town. Consider tonight on the house, anyway.

[And wishes are more easily explained to cynics in person, so she'll just leave it at that for now.]

[Dictated]

[nooooo]

Cool. I'll save the trip to the magic ATM for tomorrow.

[It'll take her ten or fifteen minutes to make it down to the bar, but she gets there.]

[Action]

[putuporshutup]

[She's just putting the finishing touches on two whiskey sours when April walks in. Wouldn't have wanted them to get watered down, after all. She looks up and gives the girl a once over, nodding at her and greeting her in a flat tone.]

Hey.

[Action]

[nooooo]

Hey.

[Equally flat tone, which is... standard for her.]

Sorry it took a while. Getting used to flying for the first time, you know. It's harder than it looks; birds deserve mad props.

Is this place seriously called the Death Match?

[She saw the sign on the way in.]

[Action]

[putuporshutup]

[Clearly the beginning of a beautiful series of monotone exchanges that could not possibly evolve into something that either of them are bothered enough to care about. She chuckles and slides one of the drinks over to the other girl with a smirk.]

I'll make sure to fistbump the next pigeon I see.

[She nods sideways at the engraved sign on the bar, as if to say "Duh, why the hell else would that be there," but she's playing nice for now. The whole place is actually totally amazeballs since the castle got a face lift and made all her dreams come true~

Not that she's bragging. /cough]

Sure is. I inherited the place so I can't take credit for the name, but I wasn't about to step on the toes of a castle legacy. Besides, it's kinda badass.