08 - of princes and princesses, part deux (i.e. she needs a facehoof icon)

[doublethefun]

[so. Some time after Twilight Sparkle's apparent inability to relay directions, Princess Luna has decided to take up the slack. The ruffled sigh she gives might be rather impressive.]

To Fluttershy, Rarity, and other princes, as 'twere:

"To create the Golden Egg, one need only feed the Cape as Red as Blood, the Shoe as Pure as Glass, the Hair as Bright as Fire, the Dress as Small as a Fairy, the Pea as Painful as a Pin, the Crown as Green as a Frog and the Rose as Old as Time to the Cow as White as Milk. After doing this, the Golden Egg will appear."





...I certainly hope thy cow will be cooperative.

[good thing she's got a pretty good memory, eh? Replies might be truncated. nvm.]

Comments

[action]

[checklist]

Thank you, Princess. I didn't think our time with the journal would be that short.

[doublethefun]

[...Sister, please please please start incorporating Common Sense 101 into your curriculum.]

Thou shouldst focus on the important matters first, Twilight Sparkle.

[checklist]

[ Quite sheepishly- ]

I was trying to make sure they had all of the facts first, but... You're completely right, Princess. A lesson learned, for next time.

I'm just thankful you were able to complete the message.

[doublethefun]

'Tis a good approach for any other occasion, but not when thou hast only a limited amount of time.

[wingshrug] In any case, it would have mattered little; there are enough of us with journals on hoof.

this is totally a valid concern

[deterrence]

[what

does that mean

the cow is producing an egg

do the princes really want to see this]

This cow must be more extraordinary than we thought.

lmfao

[doublethefun]

I can only hope that this cow is extraordinary in the metaphorical sense.

[deterrence]

[SIDE-EYEING SAID COW]

I hope so too.

[doublethefun]

[hm]

Can the cow speak?

[3_butterflies]

Princess Luna! Thank goodness you're all right! I was so worried...

[Wait...]

... All of that isn't very good for a cow's digestive system.

[doublethefun]

Fluttershy! I am so glad to hear from thee.

[...]

Yea, thou speakest truly; I highly doubt any of that is good for anypony's digestive system. Either this cow has extraordinary stomachs or this 'feeding' is metaphorical.

[3_butterflies]

The cow looks normal to me, but then I haven't spoken to her too much. But whatever it takes, we'll do what we have to in order to get you free. I promise!

[doublethefun]

With thee on the case, I am not overly worried. [woo, reassurance.]

More important is thy well-being. How art thou, dear Fluttershy?

[huffythedragon]

[...What is this even? What is wrong with you ponies?

Well, he's not going to be involved with this silly girly game. Nope. He's got really manly stuff to do.

Like bake Conan a cheesecake]

...Cow laying an egg. Okay.

[doublethefun]

[while wearing a manly apron?]

I certainly did not formulate these instructions - I am merely relaying them.

[huffythedragon]

[Hey his apron is the manliest thing]

Right. For that princess game you and the rest of the girls are playing.

Isn't it kind of weird for a princess to pretend she is a princess?

[doublethefun]

[you would be getting such a look right now, if she wasn't trapped in some stupid dream labyrinth]

However ridiculous the motif may be, this is hardly a game, young Spike.

[someoneto_carry]

...[Wow]

We'll get her too, I'm sure.

[doublethefun]

[a bit of a wince. Sorta wondering if she just inspired a round of ungulate cruelty.]

I am not sure how thou wilt go about doing so. Most of these items seem unpalatable at best and downright dangerous at worst. [swallowing glass? No thanks.]

[someoneto_carry]

I know, but if it's some sorta fairytale thing? I'm sure those rules of logic are gonna be overlooked by the cow's stomach.

[rarities]

Princess! You're safe as well?

I must say, it's been an absolute nightmare trying to get all the items we were asked to get. [ ... she didn't do anything, except sit there and fret over everything] I do hope what you've said will make the Egg!

[doublethefun]

[good ole' Rarity]

'Tis wonderful to hear from thee as well, fair Rarity!

Hath it? I am certainly sorry; it soundeth like quite a long list of items. [Fluttershy seemed perfectly content, but then again, Fluttershy is better equipped to deal with bears than Rarity is.]

[rarities]

[yeah, well. rarity is just a whinybutt mcdramaqueen]

It's not so much long as it is the people who have them aren't so willing to give them up!

[perfectisnteasy]

... Correct me if I'm wrong, but eating a glass shoe doesn't sound like it makes a whole lot of sense.

[doublethefun]

These were the instructions we received; I am merely the messenger.

Either thou hast an extraordinary cow upon thy hooves or the instructions were not to be taken literally.

[perfectisnteasy]

[but princess, literal is the only way CLU takes directions]

What's that supposed to mean?