2 Crumpets

[sandoval]

[The first thing that appears is a strange mark in the journals. Then, underneath it, the most elegant handwriting of the Xoan Ambassador.]

This mark and attached notice are here to alert you to great news. The news, of course, is that your journals are now the property of Mistress. She will let you look after them for the time being, as a sign of her good will. She's a very generous dictatress, you know.

Have a pleasant day!

(( ooc: Also have a matching log post for in-person interactions!

Sandoval is awful, so if you or your character(s) are uncomfortable with sexual material, please post HERE for my reference! Thank you! ))

Comments

[sandoval]

Shame - I was being perfectly serious!

She's just a peach, isn't she?

[onlyanapple]

Well, I'm not sure if 'peach' is the word I'd use...

She's...interesting.

[sandoval]

And what word would you use, my good sir?

Yes, very interesting! It's why I spend so much time with her, you see. There's never a dull moment.

[onlyanapple]

Poisonous Apple, perhaps?

Try not to strain anything, and remember to drink lots of water.

[sandoval]

I take it you've been on Mistress' bad side, then?

Water? Boring. Wine is much better.

[onlyanapple]

Not especially. Probably not, anyway.

Ahhh now you're a man after my own tastes.

Sorry for the lateness! December's been really busy.

[sandoval]

Then you must be a rather perceptive one. Or you've known the Mistress too long. Either way, if she accepts you, then I'm happy to as well. One can never have enough acquaintances and friends.

Indeed! The only true pleasures in life are good wine and good company. Though a few pastries never hurt either!

tis cool!

[onlyanapple]

I'd go for the first one, more than anything. Still, truer words were never spoken.

Pastries, hmm?

[sandoval]

Pity. Mistress is always fun to be around! Perhaps you should spend more time with her.

I do like to think I say some very true things - at least once in a while.

Yes, pastries! Have you never heard of them? They're these sweet, delectable, flaky little things, filled with all sorts of delicious fillings. They're quite seductive, too, the naughty little things.

[onlyanapple]

I'm sure that would be extremely interesting for both of us.

[There's a delicate pause here] You mean...like eating pastries off people and suchlike, right? Not the...pastries themselves.

[sandoval]

And then I could certainly meet you in person! Oh, wouldn't that be grand?

Oh, well, I suppose there's that, too. But I meant the pastries themselves! Though you do bring up a good point...

[onlyanapple]

...Sure, why not?

[Pause] That's quite the kink you have there.

[sandoval]

I'll be expecting to meet you soon, then. Don't leave me waiting too long!

Mm, I know, but I simply just can't help myself. But most of the time, the little tarts deserve it.

[onlyanapple]

I wouldn't dream of it.

You're a very special guy, you know that, Sandoval?

[sandoval]

So I've been told! I would hate to think otherwise, myself.

[onlyanapple]

So long as you're aware.

[sandoval]

Oh, I am, to be sure! There's a reason the Mistress keeps me around as her pet ambassador, after all. But I wouldn't have it any other way, I don't think. If I did, then I'd be stuck entertaining Prince Cyrron of Aub or some dreadful thing like that.

[onlyanapple]

Oh what a poor life you would have led.

[sandoval]

Indeed! He's really no fun - hopefully one of those scorpions stung him when he opened the box Mistress sent him, but, that may just be my opinion.

[onlyanapple]

...Scorpions, huh? Romantic.

[sandoval]

Well, he did try to poison her with a slave's cock first. It's only fair.

[onlyanapple]

...

Right. That's normal and...fair?

[sandoval]

I'm so glad you agree with me! He could have been polite and sent an assassin, but nooo, he had to be sneaky about it.

[onlyanapple]

Well that's just not fair, not in such a....serious business venture as this? [He worries about your life sometimes, Sandoval. He really does]

[sandoval]

[You should see him when he's drunk.]

All is fair in love and war - and "gifts" for "ambassadorial" purposes. He sends her a slave with a poisoned cock - she sent the ambassador's head back in a box with scorpions. Fair trade, I think.