paradisa | 1/001

Entry tags:

wheatley

1/001

[Oh god, now who is this guy? He's new, and he looks pretty mad. He's pacing the lobby like a mad freak. Fists clenched, hair ruffled and glasses broken, he's pretty hard to ignore because of the fact he's yelling out at the top of his lungs. Someone's gotta hear this guy.]

"Hello!? Helloooooo~
I said hello! Ca-can anybody hear me?
This is a joke... this is a joke right?
Someone-Someone want to tell me what's going on?"

[He pauses, and messes up his newly found hair, and then has a minor freakout. There he goes, talking to himself...]

"Ohhh my god, ahaha... oh this is ridiculous. THIS IS ridiculous, truly and utterly ridiculous!
I can't even conceive how ridiculous this is... this... this is like the epitome of ridiculous right here, right here in one place. It's-"

[He turns around, and trips over his footing, knocking over a vase. Oop.]

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[HIS HEART. IS BREAKING. WHY DID SHE HAVE TO SAY THAT. Wheatley lets out a whimper and sighs. He tries to not look affected, but he cant, his voice cracks too much.]

"Okay, okay okay fine! Just. Fine, I'll do it. I'll, I'll i'm going!"

[He removes his clothes, and stumbles rather clumsily into the water, splashing water everywhere.]

"Ommmmnngfghhf.. IM DROwnngkggggningg... mmhng..."

[no pity here, but she'll use her magic to sit him upright in the tub]

Try to keep thy face above the surface of the water. Now close thy eyes whilst I work on thy mane.

[shampooing that rat's nest right now] And what does the castle do to ensure that we are kept away from...?

[He shuts his eyes. But he's FROWNING the entire time]

"We-well. Anything that includes a threat to this castle. But As I study further into the ghosts, I wonder... perhaps I could get their attention, or whatever it is that is the consciousness of this house. Figure out the real intention behind this castle. They cant just want to pluck random individuals out of their lives for the hell of it? There's... no goal to that, and there always has to be an intent... because if that does happen to be true, which- which it isn't! That would be... really... really stupid."

[rinsing off the shampoo and getting conditioner into his hair now]

Sometimes, one does not have a greater goal in mind. Sometimes, one may just cause chaos for the sake of chaos.

[He is quiet for a long time. It's as if he's thinking.]

"Then... I guess I'd have to return the favor."

[That sounded... a bit... dark, Wheatley. He didn't say it in his usual fast, content tone. It was slow, almost worrisome.]

[satisfied he's clean, she finally drains the water and rinses the soap off of him. She floats a couple of towels over. One goes in his hands while she uses the other to dry off his hair.]

One eradicates chaos by restoring order. Adding chaos on top of chaos hardly helps.

Did thy books mention what sort of punishment was meted out for attempting to burn down the castle?

[He takes the towel and shakes his head]

"Th-that's just it. It just states SEVERE PUNISHMENT, in big boldly letters and everything, for- for the emphasis. I think- I think I'm going to ask around."

[He looks at her.]

"I'm beginning to wonder what I'm gonna get myself into, to be honest."

That would be best. The library is not known for information on Paradisa itself.

[she takes a look at his smelly clothes and teleports them elsewhere. And quietly asks the castle for a new set of clothes.]

"I may of... eh..."

[He laughed nervously]

"Scoped the place out for other books once the library was cleared. You'd be surprised at the horrible grammar some people in this castle have."

[He wraps the towel around himself and stands up.]

[assuming it was other people's non-magical-castle-journals; 'cause their journals just reads like yours.

Holding out the clothes to him and frowning:] That was rude of thee.

"Rude yes! But also practical And Very. very. very. useful."

[He takes the clothes, and begins putting them on. His arms and legs are covered in scratches and cuts. There also looks like a part on his shoulder is burned. He looks just as bad as his old clothes- only cleaner.In fact- what has he been doing?]

"I promise you though, it won't happen again if the chance doesn't arrive again, though. So there you go. Hehehehe."

[notices the cuts - now that the dirt is washed off. Dryly] Can I assume they have not been welcoming of thy intrusion? Why art thou hurt?

"Huh? Oh this? Haha, um some of them... I think. Some of them are from those awful awful awful stairs, others are from... um experiments I have been working on up in my apartment. It's rather spacey up there. I like it."

[Spacey. No pun intended. hahaha.]

"I wouldn't mind if you didn't just come up and I'd show you. Interesting things indeed, you'd be amazed."

[a sigh. She didn't think she'd become a babysitter.] I know thou art not familiar with a blood and flesh body. However, thou shouldst take care of thyself lest an infection takes thee.

Sit and take off thy shirt. [she nods towards the ledge of the bathtub and then floats down a first aid kit]

Before that, I wish to ask thee something of import. How is it that an inanimate object can be sentient?

[He sits down at the edge of the bathtub and slicks his wet hair back.He almost didn't realize that she was talking about him]

"M-me? Are you talking about me?"

[He pauses for a moment]

"You- you know I wondered that before. You know. It's like, it's like... they told me it was impossible... for me to feel and... actually have... well be living and things like that. But. I feel so real. Even back when I was a core. I thought for myself and- and things. I didn't repeat myself or anything, and I mean...

[He pinches himself]

"Ow! Y-you you see that? I flinched! Because- well, because it hurt. I mean if I weren't real I wouldn't felt that right? So that's- that's possible... I have to be right?"

[It's like he's asking, more than answering the question.]

Thou art most certainly real. I only wish I understood the concept behind it.

[though this might be karma after all that scoffing when faced with the "ponies can talk???" reaction.

Unscrewing the disinfectant.]

This may sting. Hold still. [applying it to any still open cuts!]

"I'm sure it won't be that bad It's just a little cu- OH AGHHFGNNGH.GHHGJNDGJNDKGNKNG...>GNNHHHNNG... AGGGHH... AGHHHH.... AGHHH... AHHH. AHHH. AHHH. OH, GOD FSHHHHT.

[He's all crying and tearing like a baby. My god he can't take anything, can he?]

"Wh...WHAT IS THAT..!?!?!."

[He pulls away from her, blowing on the cuts, then waving his arms around like a crazy person]

[she just sits there, entirely unimpressed and just waiting for him to shut up]

'Tis disinfectant. Does it still hurt?

"GNNNNNGH... hnnnhnnhnnnhnnghh..."

[Is that whimpering I hear?]

"n...no."

Very well, then.

[she sticks a band-aid on the cut and then starts swabbing the next one with the alcohol.]

What hast thou been experimenting on?

[With each one, he flinches, but as she continues, he seems to react less and less dramatically.]

"Things really. Everything that I can get my hands on. Getting out of here is just one. I need to get my consciousness out of this body. I've been trying to build things like my core... but... it just doesn't seem to work. Other thing's... are for the sake of science... like... like you ponies. I had never seen anything like you before until now. So-so... I guess... I decided to study you too."

[He laughs nervously. She didn't want her to freak out or make him drink clorox with that weird magic of hers.]

[there is a pause as she mulls over this.]

I do not mind if such studies are restricted to books or interviews. However, [the shadows in the corners of the room might be lengthening] if thou shouldst hurt any of my little ponies, then thou may assumest that our friendship will be terminated.

[terminated in a really bad way]

[...]

"..."

[He sounds nervous]

"Ehehe, don't worry about that. I didn't mean anything... of that sort. It's just your magic is... really very... fascinating!"

[Then he stops]

"Friendship?"

[He laughs a little.]

"I didn't think you liked me all that much."

As long as we understand each other.

[and the room is nice and bright again]

There are many humans here with magic as well. And if I did not at least tolerate thee, I would not be babysitting thee.

[floats his shirt over now that she's done with the bandaids]

[Sunnnnshiiiinnneeeee]

"Ba-babysitting? I am not a baby! I'm- I'm an intelligence sphere!"

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doublethefun - 2012-02-21 18:27 (UTC) - Expand

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