1/012: We are frienemies. [Dated back to a day before Larry's date kk]

[wheatdos]

[Wheatley and GLaDOS would be in the kitchen, conversing casually on the first day of their one week truce. That's right everyone, these two psychopaths are actually on a truce. Meaning that they are not going to kill each other or endanger any of the residents of Paradisa.

Wheatley and GlaDOS would be digging through one of the cabinets, looking for a pan... this place really needed to be labeled out. This truce wasn't even a forced one. Spirits would be content, and would even hold an air of amusement.]

"Hmmm... let's see- let's see. Gonna need a pan. Those are important, and... and some eggs. You need eggs to make eggs... oh and some of that... that yellow stuff."

"Of course you need eggs to make eggs, moron."

"Not a moron."

[She would bite back "moron"; that word came too easily. After searching through the cabinets, GLaDOS would eventually find some butter in the fridge, taking it out and offering it to Wheatley.]

"H-how about those little round cakes? Those can't be that difficult to make..."


[Shocked friends of GLaDOS and Wheatley, feel free to barge in on this and ask what the heck is going on!]

Comments

[sawadeertoday]

... [ She considers this. She actually considers this. ] Hm, but why would the recipe call for burnt peppers?

[ Well, she was finding some of the generic pancake stuff, at least, which she was adding to the ingredients on the counter. ]

[wheatdos]

"I... Y' know, I honestly don't know! But! It is what the book says."

[He holds up the book again, though he sets it down to help her collect some of the things.]

"This isn't so bad. Being friends. Making spicy pancakes. Interesting right? Different, definitely different.

[sawadeertoday]

Hm, I guess we'll at least try your theory. [ Hm. Did it matter what color the peppers were prior to being burnt? Hopefully not, because then they'd be going off of a fifty-fifty gamble.

Her thoughts concerning peppers were pushed to the side momentarily, though, as she glanced at him. Then back at the latest ingredients she was putting on the counter. ] ... It could be a lot worse.

[ she admitted. It was only because they had promised not to kill each other that they weren't on edge and snappy at each other as usual... but it was pleasant in its own right. ]

[wheatdos]

"Huuuh... let's seeeeeee. Someone should really label these things. Makes it alot easier to actually TELL what it is that's going on here. Really unthoughtful. I bet they didn't even think of the AI in this place."

[He IS NOT LETTING GO OF THE AI THING. It's what makes him feel superior to anything alive in the castle. Wheatley started looking at the tools that would be needed... a knife, a bowl... he knew what those were at least.]

"By any chance... did you get a certain letter? A mysterious letter, Written- written by, someone that you don't know?"

[sawadeertoday]

[ GLaDOS noticed how he clung onto the title. She had also been doing so since she had gotten here, but now, less so. She was kind of in an in between stage, feeling rather worthless without her extensive knowledge back in the chassis.

But the question about the letter makes her furrow her brow in confusion. How would he know about it? ] And why are you asking that?

[ Before remembering that was way too suspicious a tone. ] ... Yes, I did.

[wheatdos]

"Funny you ask! Because-because I was getting to that. Obviously."

[He avoids eye contact... just gonna collect those plates kk...]

"Practically obsessed with you. Even asked me what I knew. Didn't say anything... obviously. None of my business. I'm not going to put my nose where it doesn't belong. B-But I was just wondering..."

[Fuck yeah! Ommitting information!]

[sawadeertoday]

[ The lack of eye contact makes her already more suspicious, but she tries to hold it in as she leans on a free wall, watching him. ]

What is it? [ she asked, supposing Wheatley had told him a thing or two from his behavior. It was kind of funny, actually, how they still wanted her to visit, then. ]

[wheatdos]

"D-do you know what he wants?"

[He swings around to look at her, setting those pots on the table.

This is a legitimate question. He actually isn't 100% of what Larry is actually getting at, want-wise. He just knew it was stupid. He's not good at this at allll. Certainly GLaDOS would be able to see the genuine confusion on his face.]

"I mean it! I'm not even asking because of some... grand scheme or anything."

[Haha. No but he really isn't. Larry is too dumb and can't help him with his genius schemey schemes. No ill intentions. He adjusted to this truce well.]

[sawadeertoday]

[ She shrugs, noting that despite his suspicious behavior, he seemed genuinely confused on this point. So he pushed this random guy towards her, unknowing of what he wanted?

GLaDOS could think of a few things. She wasn't an expert, but quite frankly, she knew that humans had to have a useless emotional attachment before continuing their legacy. The stupidly-written letter proved fhat much, at least, what with the awkward compliments. ]

Simply put, he likely wants to pursue "romantic" endeavors. Which likely include continuing the line of humans at the end. [ Notice how her nose wrinkles there? She finds it disgusting. ]

[wheatdos]

"Huh? Oh...oh...Pfftgnh... OhThat'sGross."

[He stifles a laugh. Oh god what.
HE DIDN'T LAUGH AT YOU, HE SWEARS. He is quick to add, saying it abnormally loud.]

"And... absolutely... appalling! Definitely!"

[Just gonna save himself...]

[sawadeertoday]

[ She just wears this disgusted expression, frowning. ]

Good job. You pushed him at me, and now I'm going to have to deal with the disgusting fact that he will likely want to reproduce with me. [ She can't help but find it funny in a way, that a former AI had pushed a human towards another AI without any ideas of his intentions, though, so she covers her mouth, which curls up in a large, amused smile. ]

[wheatdos]

[He slouches a little. Oh so she knew.]

"Weeelllll. Could be worse.... Could be much much worse....

[He looks away, rubbing the back of his neck, nervously.]

"..Uh, so...ummm...how did you know?"

[sawadeertoday]

[ She uncovers her mouth after she makes sure her smile is under check and is less wide. ]

Well, from the way you were acting, it was easy to guess. Especially knowing about the letter. You probably helped him with it.

[ She looks over the wide amount of ingredients and tools littering the counters. ] I think we're about done.

[wheatdos]

"Yeah! Alright... so it says here we have to chop them up. No problem! Gonna get right on that."

[He gets the knife and starts chopping... then he thought about that..."You probably helped him with it.".]

"What... what makes y-you think I'd help him with that??"

[sawadeertoday]

[ She supposes she'll get started on burning a part of all of the pepper, so she grabs another knife to awkwardly chop the pepper that he wasn't currently on in half. ]

Well, who knows. He likely knew nothing about me, and you helped him fill in the blanks. [ To be honest, she wondered if Wheatley had written the letter, what with the idioticness of it all. ]

[wheatdos]

"..."

[He chuckles...]

"Ahhh, nonono. You know, I-if you say it like that, it sounds like I know you well. Which-- when I think about it, I don't. Nope! Not at all. You could be an axe murderer, or one of those polygamists... no wait that's not right... Eitherway! Wouldn't know the difference."

[He raises his head to look at her. Once he finishes chopping stuff up, he starts to make the pancake mix...]

"Admit it. Admit it. You don't know all that much about me neither."

[sawadeertoday]

[ GLaDOS snorts at his description. She supposed he really didn't know anything, but then again, there was not much to her.

When all that mattered was science, and nothing stupidly human. ]

I know enough. You were made to attach to me, to slow me down. You were the ID sphere.

[ By now, she put the half of the pepper in the pan and put it over the flame, having fiddled with the knobs until she found the proper one. ]

[1/2]

[wheatdos]

[oh... uh...]

[2/2]

[wheatdos]

[Just... gonna be quiet and crack open those eggs... in a really awkward silence.]

"..."

[sawadeertoday]

[ She hesitates as she lets the half of a pepper burn on the stove. ]

... But besides your primary function, I suppose I don't know anything else. [ she concedes, supposing friends were supposed to have more pleasant conversation. So she adds awkwardly: ] So... tell me about yourself.

[wheatdos]

[He raises his head, looking surprised. Okay, that caught him off guard. He looks a little... excited. Oh, god... he's always wanted to tell someon about himself.]

"W-wait... really?"

[sawadeertoday]

Don't make me say it again. [ she says, averting her eyes as she watched the pepper finally start burning, and she carefully lowered the flame level.

What had she just gotten herself into? ]

[wheatdos]

"Weeeeelllllll...."

[He sets the eggs down, and laughs, approaching her, all slow-like.]

"Wow... I neveeeeeer expected anyone to ever ask me this, you know. Just out of the blue. I wish I had a way to prepare before hand... but... about me.. about me... about me..."

[Are you really ready for this?]

[sawadeertoday]

[ She's kind of put on-edge by the way he suddenly laughs and approaches her, so she ends up looking at him, if only to keep an eye on him. ]

Go ahead. [ she urges casually, before turning off the stove to let the now burnt half of pepper cool off. ]

[wheatdos]

"Okay... Wellllllllllll.... I love tea for one. Ohhhhhh, that stuff is gooooooooood. Love it. Best thing that the humans made in my opinion. Aside from us, but you probably know that... black and green tea happen to be my favorite... I'll tell you what... if you ever want to try some, I'll be glad to give you some. You'll love it. Uhhh, what else? Hmmm....what else, what else, what else... Oh! I love to dance too... Ballroom, classical stuff... and maybe some tango. Never really got into the modern day stuff. It’s a bit... not for me. Tried it. Didn’t think much of it. Oh! and Classical music! Yehehes, classical music is definitely one of my favorites. Gotta love that. Most intellectuals do. There's this one in particular... Beethoven? He’s a real talented guy. Made all sorts of things. Really, I never knew that he could play all those instruments either. And then recorded them by himself. Impressive. Still don’t know how he did that.

On.. on uh, on my free time, When I’m not doing science... cause, you know, I do science a lot, I guess I love to read a good book. Read almost all the books. ‘Cept for the romance novels. Those aren’t particularly... interesting. Human romance, ugh. I’d rather die than read that. Vomit on a page s’what it is. Vomit on a page. Sometimes, I just go outside and lie on the grass and read the good books though. It’s really relaxing. Invigorating, allows me to really clear my mind when I wasn’t trying to kill you. You know, before this truce and all.

...

You know I really did enjoy that. Figuring out how I’d kill you. But I really am enjoying this more. I guess being your friend is something that I really... like doing. Being. Relatively new, but I think it still counts. I think I might miss it when this is all over and done with. Shouldn’t have told you that one, but, ehhh what can you do?
I’m a real builder too love. Bet you wouldn’t think that. You know... uh, with the crap turrets. Shouldn’t have mentioned those either. Just going to... push that back in the past... but! I’ve made loads of things. My core for one. Still working on that. Other stuff too... The castle’s giving me real difficulty with it. V’got my partner though. She’s really helpful with that, so... not as much of a problem.
What else... huh.

Oh! Favorite color! Favorite color’s blue. Right. Blue. Like me.”

[He takes a breath. Looks like he's going to continue-- STOP HIM.]