1/012: We are frienemies. [Dated back to a day before Larry's date kk]

[wheatdos]

[Wheatley and GLaDOS would be in the kitchen, conversing casually on the first day of their one week truce. That's right everyone, these two psychopaths are actually on a truce. Meaning that they are not going to kill each other or endanger any of the residents of Paradisa.

Wheatley and GlaDOS would be digging through one of the cabinets, looking for a pan... this place really needed to be labeled out. This truce wasn't even a forced one. Spirits would be content, and would even hold an air of amusement.]

"Hmmm... let's see- let's see. Gonna need a pan. Those are important, and... and some eggs. You need eggs to make eggs... oh and some of that... that yellow stuff."

"Of course you need eggs to make eggs, moron."

"Not a moron."

[She would bite back "moron"; that word came too easily. After searching through the cabinets, GLaDOS would eventually find some butter in the fridge, taking it out and offering it to Wheatley.]

"H-how about those little round cakes? Those can't be that difficult to make..."


[Shocked friends of GLaDOS and Wheatley, feel free to barge in on this and ask what the heck is going on!]

Comments

[sawadeertoday]

[ GLaDOS would sigh. ]

Maybe a cookbook would be a good idea. So we could actually make something without an estimate at the ingredients, and end up ruining the meal. [ Considering how they were both unaware of the specifics of cooking, it would be a better idea. ]

[wheatdos]

[He set the pan on the stove, and takes the butter from her.]

"Right! A book! A book always has all the answers. Undoubtedly. If you need an answer, look in a book- Is there a book anywhere around?"

[So... time to turn on the stove. He kind've... just stares at the stove, and then clears his throat, wandering around the kitchen. Play it smooth!]

"Ca-can you turn on the stove? ...I'llllllllll look for it."

[sawadeertoday]

[ Yep, this was definitely a tactic to make her do something he had no clue how to do.

She just raised an eyebrow at him. ]

I'll need the butter, first.

[ She was trying to recall how it had been used again. How had that man made those eggs again...? ]

[wheatdos]

"Oh-oh right."

[He tossed her the butter, and proceeded to look around for some... sort of cookbook. Eventually he'd find one...]

"H-hey love?"

[He'd pull it out, reading the title. He struggled a little... to read it... what kind of word is that?]

"What's Kay...june food?"

[sawadeertoday]

[ She barely caught the butter, placing it next to the stove on the counter as she thought. She was pretty sure he had made it melt in the pan, but she wasn't sure what to do next. Put the eggs?

It was about then when Wheatley interrupted her train of thought. ]

I have no idea. [ She walked over, half-behind him so she could attempt to glimpse inside the book. ] Are there any pictures in it?

[wheatdos]

"Um..."

[He turns to her, and opens the book, flipping through it in front of her. He'd eventually stop at: CAJAN SPICY PANCAKES.]

"Spicy pancakes...! Right, those are what those are called. Pancakes. Pancakes. There we go. Huh...What's spicy? Probably just a name."

[Wheatley has never tasted "spicy" before. He had no idea... ]

[sawadeertoday]

[ Hm. Spicy pancakes. It sounded harmless enough. Unfortunately for the both of them, GLaDOS also had no clue what this would entail... ]

Alright. Let's see what the ingredients are...

[ She would start to pore over them, not really recognizing half of the names of things. Hm. They would have to improvise, then... ]

[wheatdos]

"Let's seeee...."

[Skim. skim. skim. He read off the parts of pancake ingredients that all pancakes had... and proceeded to read:

"T-table salt, cayenne pepper, uh... black pepper, red pepper... green pepper... bell peppers, jalapeno peppers...uh, um wow, there's alot of peppers here... haha, anyway... and finally chili!"

[He lowers the book.]

"Uh... wow. Wasn't expecting that much, I can tell you that. Uh, please tell me you know at least half of what those things are..."

[sawadeertoday]

[ Most of the pancake ingredients were understandable.

But all of the different kinds of peppers confused her. Hm. ]

I know most of it. But I wonder if this place even has all of these kinds of peppers. [ she muses, heading for the fridge. If said peppers weren't there, how could they replace them? ]

... I see red and green peppers; that's a start. [ She removes them from the fridge, placing them on the counter before rummaging in there again. ] I'm not sure if black peppers even exist. Maybe they're chemically modified?

[wheatdos]

"If...we burn them. They will be black."

[sawadeertoday]

... [ She considers this. She actually considers this. ] Hm, but why would the recipe call for burnt peppers?

[ Well, she was finding some of the generic pancake stuff, at least, which she was adding to the ingredients on the counter. ]

[wheatdos]

"I... Y' know, I honestly don't know! But! It is what the book says."

[He holds up the book again, though he sets it down to help her collect some of the things.]

"This isn't so bad. Being friends. Making spicy pancakes. Interesting right? Different, definitely different.

[sawadeertoday]

Hm, I guess we'll at least try your theory. [ Hm. Did it matter what color the peppers were prior to being burnt? Hopefully not, because then they'd be going off of a fifty-fifty gamble.

Her thoughts concerning peppers were pushed to the side momentarily, though, as she glanced at him. Then back at the latest ingredients she was putting on the counter. ] ... It could be a lot worse.

[ she admitted. It was only because they had promised not to kill each other that they weren't on edge and snappy at each other as usual... but it was pleasant in its own right. ]

[wheatdos]

"Huuuh... let's seeeeeee. Someone should really label these things. Makes it alot easier to actually TELL what it is that's going on here. Really unthoughtful. I bet they didn't even think of the AI in this place."

[He IS NOT LETTING GO OF THE AI THING. It's what makes him feel superior to anything alive in the castle. Wheatley started looking at the tools that would be needed... a knife, a bowl... he knew what those were at least.]

"By any chance... did you get a certain letter? A mysterious letter, Written- written by, someone that you don't know?"

[sawadeertoday]

[ GLaDOS noticed how he clung onto the title. She had also been doing so since she had gotten here, but now, less so. She was kind of in an in between stage, feeling rather worthless without her extensive knowledge back in the chassis.

But the question about the letter makes her furrow her brow in confusion. How would he know about it? ] And why are you asking that?

[ Before remembering that was way too suspicious a tone. ] ... Yes, I did.

[wheatdos]

"Funny you ask! Because-because I was getting to that. Obviously."

[He avoids eye contact... just gonna collect those plates kk...]

"Practically obsessed with you. Even asked me what I knew. Didn't say anything... obviously. None of my business. I'm not going to put my nose where it doesn't belong. B-But I was just wondering..."

[Fuck yeah! Ommitting information!]

[sawadeertoday]

[ The lack of eye contact makes her already more suspicious, but she tries to hold it in as she leans on a free wall, watching him. ]

What is it? [ she asked, supposing Wheatley had told him a thing or two from his behavior. It was kind of funny, actually, how they still wanted her to visit, then. ]

[wheatdos]

"D-do you know what he wants?"

[He swings around to look at her, setting those pots on the table.

This is a legitimate question. He actually isn't 100% of what Larry is actually getting at, want-wise. He just knew it was stupid. He's not good at this at allll. Certainly GLaDOS would be able to see the genuine confusion on his face.]

"I mean it! I'm not even asking because of some... grand scheme or anything."

[Haha. No but he really isn't. Larry is too dumb and can't help him with his genius schemey schemes. No ill intentions. He adjusted to this truce well.]

[sawadeertoday]

[ She shrugs, noting that despite his suspicious behavior, he seemed genuinely confused on this point. So he pushed this random guy towards her, unknowing of what he wanted?

GLaDOS could think of a few things. She wasn't an expert, but quite frankly, she knew that humans had to have a useless emotional attachment before continuing their legacy. The stupidly-written letter proved fhat much, at least, what with the awkward compliments. ]

Simply put, he likely wants to pursue "romantic" endeavors. Which likely include continuing the line of humans at the end. [ Notice how her nose wrinkles there? She finds it disgusting. ]

[wheatdos]

"Huh? Oh...oh...Pfftgnh... OhThat'sGross."

[He stifles a laugh. Oh god what.
HE DIDN'T LAUGH AT YOU, HE SWEARS. He is quick to add, saying it abnormally loud.]

"And... absolutely... appalling! Definitely!"

[Just gonna save himself...]

[sawadeertoday]

[ She just wears this disgusted expression, frowning. ]

Good job. You pushed him at me, and now I'm going to have to deal with the disgusting fact that he will likely want to reproduce with me. [ She can't help but find it funny in a way, that a former AI had pushed a human towards another AI without any ideas of his intentions, though, so she covers her mouth, which curls up in a large, amused smile. ]

[wheatdos]

[He slouches a little. Oh so she knew.]

"Weeelllll. Could be worse.... Could be much much worse....

[He looks away, rubbing the back of his neck, nervously.]

"..Uh, so...ummm...how did you know?"

[sawadeertoday]

[ She uncovers her mouth after she makes sure her smile is under check and is less wide. ]

Well, from the way you were acting, it was easy to guess. Especially knowing about the letter. You probably helped him with it.

[ She looks over the wide amount of ingredients and tools littering the counters. ] I think we're about done.

[wheatdos]

"Yeah! Alright... so it says here we have to chop them up. No problem! Gonna get right on that."

[He gets the knife and starts chopping... then he thought about that..."You probably helped him with it.".]

"What... what makes y-you think I'd help him with that??"

[sawadeertoday]

[ She supposes she'll get started on burning a part of all of the pepper, so she grabs another knife to awkwardly chop the pepper that he wasn't currently on in half. ]

Well, who knows. He likely knew nothing about me, and you helped him fill in the blanks. [ To be honest, she wondered if Wheatley had written the letter, what with the idioticness of it all. ]